Bright frilly shirts, long flowing skirts, flower topped sandals I hated giving up for boots in winter.
                            Long Native American dark brown hair tied into braids.
                 Big brown eyes that earn compliments, never understanding why.

                                                 This is who I am.
                                            This is where I am from.
                                                     I am Sonja. 

                  I am from Grandma’s flourishing, pink, red, and white tulip garden,
  the imaginary fairy garden my childish mind created as I swung from my rope bound red swing,
                 I am the flower child my Woodstock era parents brought into this world.
                            
                          I am from melodic brass instruments I heard as a child,
                 the booming symphonies I watched big brother play trombone in,
                                         I am the musician I dreamt of.

                         I am from the lonely, isolated, melancholy homeschooling,
                              the fright felt in the crowded public school hallways,
                              I am the “normal” person I dreamt of being.

                                          I am from the eating disorder,
              the tears standing on the old bathroom scale seeing false images in the mirror,
                   I am the girl who overcame an acidic, catastrophic, fatal addiction.

                                   I am from the mind crippling alzheimer's,
                       Mother’s frustrated tears and her mentally unstable father,
                           I am the granddaughter who lost her last grandparent.

                                     I am from father’s terminal illness,
           the watching daddy’s face get paler, his body more feeble and not understanding why,
                 I am the daughter weeping over the collapsing end of her father’s life.

                                  I am from newborn nieces and nephews,
             watching them grow from chubby cheeked infants to intelligent young adults,
                                                    I am auntie Sonja.

                                     I am from the honors choir audition,
                    the screaming joy when was accepted and the fear after,
                                                  I am accomplished.

                                             I am from the family home,
          the “Good Mornin’ Sunshine” and “Smile Darlin’, the whole world will smile with you.”,
                                                       I am loved.

                       Dark oversized sweaters, skinny jeans, sandals year round.
                       Long Native American dark brown hair swung off to one side.
                         Big brown eyes that earn compliments, I understand why.

                                                  This is who I am
                                            This is where I am from.
                                                     I am Sonja.