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If I fall

May 2, 2013
By Desiraay GOLD, Billerica, Massachusetts
More by this author
Desiraay GOLD, Billerica, Massachusetts
13 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
It&#039;s sad to think how many people are shocked by honesty and so few by lies<br /> (Changed it up a little from a book I read)

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If I fall
I will get back up
If I fall
I will stand up and
brush myself off
If I fall
I will ask for help
For everyone falls
and
this fall is called life...

© Rachel B., Rome, NY

The author's comments:
Just came too me(:
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 4 comments.

Desiraay GOLD said...
on May. 8 2013 at 7:20 pm
Desiraay GOLD, Billerica, Massachusetts
13 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
It&#039;s sad to think how many people are shocked by honesty and so few by lies<br /> (Changed it up a little from a book I read)

View profile
thanks for the advice i did have more but i forget it somewherer so im still looking for it(:
Desiraay GOLD said...
on May. 8 2013 at 7:19 pm
Desiraay GOLD, Billerica, Massachusetts
13 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
It&#039;s sad to think how many people are shocked by honesty and so few by lies<br /> (Changed it up a little from a book I read)

View profile
thanks alot(: tell me if you want me to comment/read anything!
Trace.C.Schuelke PLATINUM said...
on May. 8 2013 at 7:11 pm
Trace.C.Schuelke PLATINUM, Oshkosh, Wisconsin
26 articles 0 photos 22 comments

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&quot;Secrets are secrets for a reason, and some do not wish to see them uncovered. Especially when the secrets are particularly unseemly...&quot;

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This poem seems to emphasize simplicity built around a short and sweet style. While I do like the message and the metaphor you use at the end, I feel as though you could have given a vast number more of imagery, detail, and overall description, while still maintaining a shotened structure. Still, the shortness of it does make it easily readable, and I liked what I read.
Pusheen612 said...
on May. 8 2013 at 7:09 pm
Pusheen612, Lake Oswego, Oregon
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This is a very well written poem and it has a little moral hidden in there. I like it. Keep it up!!