All Nonfiction
- Bullying
- Books
- Academic
- Author Interviews
- Celebrity interviews
- College Articles
- College Essays
- Educator of the Year
- Heroes
- Interviews
- Memoir
- Personal Experience
- Sports
- Travel & Culture
All Opinions
- Bullying
- Current Events / Politics
- Discrimination
- Drugs / Alcohol / Smoking
- Entertainment / Celebrities
- Environment
- Love / Relationships
- Movies / Music / TV
- Pop Culture / Trends
- School / College
- Social Issues / Civics
- Spirituality / Religion
- Sports / Hobbies
All Hot Topics
- Bullying
- Community Service
- Environment
- Health
- Letters to the Editor
- Pride & Prejudice
- What Matters
- Back
Summer Guide
- Program Links
- Program Reviews
- Back
College Guide
- College Links
- College Reviews
- College Essays
- College Articles
- Back
Unsteady
March 7, 2017
go, go, go on,
go leave me,
when I'm a little unsteady,
a little unsteady.
mama,
she left,
no approach,
disappeared.
daddy, I'm alone,
this house never felt like home
you don't love me,
you let go
you don't love me,
you let go.
you don't love me,
you let go,
when I felt lost,
helpless,
unsteady.
go, go, go on,
go leave me
because i'm a little unsteady
a little unsteady
mother, I know,
that you're tired of being my mom
dad I know your trying
to fly because I feel like dying
you don't love me you let go
you don't love me you let go
go,go
go on
go leave me
when im going unsteady
going unsteady
© Melinda M., Phoenix, AZ
Similar Articles
Previous Next
JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 5 comments.
makeupartist16 BRONZE said...
on Apr. 14 2017 at 2:51 pm
I like the emotion you put into. The repetition of 'go,go,go on' is great, but some of the repetitious phrases could be edited. It is more of a stylistic preference. You also add some lines about how it feels to be unsteady. You say why you feel unsteady,but you never elaborate on what that feeling is. overall, great job!
Thisisreal_life PLATINUM said...
on Mar. 16 2017 at 10:50 am
@ tigerlilyorange I have edited this poem. i hope you enjoy the newer version when it comes out. thanks so much for your feed back! that is the type i am looking for!!!!
Thisisreal_life PLATINUM said...
on Mar. 16 2017 at 10:49 am
!!!!!!!!!!!
Thisisreal_life PLATINUM said...
on Mar. 15 2017 at 8:28 pm
Wow... Thank you for the great critique and feedback. I will definitely work in that. Thanks so much!!!
tigerlilyorange SILVER said...
on Mar. 14 2017 at 6:46 pm
You said in the forum you wanted some critique... Just a few technicalities first: you spelled you're wrong as your. Also sometimes you capitalize and sometimes not. I think you could make it more powerful if you didn't, as that is how most of the poem is written. I like the repetition of go go on, but it varies how you say it. Maybe consider having one phrase you consistently bring back. Also, it is a little unclear as to what you mean by "unsteady." Maybe put in a line or two describing why you need them so much, even though you are telling them to go on.
This song has the most impact if you listen to a kareoke version of unsteady by the X ambassadors and use these lyrics