fear
is forgetting the friction of your lips
and palms
against my own
twice

fear
is the endless dark wall
approaching with each blissful second
casting its shadow on each
before it ends

fear
is when everything that is anything
(light, dark, beautiful, sharp)
comes to share a single
source, crevice, ground,
precipice

fear
is not swallowing anything for
a day and a half
because permanence
is out of the f***ing
question

fear
is when you stop lighting
scented candles
and washing your hands to wash out the
smell of cigarette smoke

i am afraid
that with the distance overcome,
with hand in hand
and lip to lip
with clothes shed
tongue between teeth
toes between toes
you between my thighs
that I will yearn for you
closer still
for our beings to mesh
for me to live inside your
throat and stomach