I have such conflicting thoughts in
my mind.
All they want to do is
break out and shout.
I can't believe I've let these things
take control.
They've been seeping away into
my skin,
dragging nails among my wrist.
I've been scratching and tearing
away myself;
piece by piece.
Just so I can be heard.

But even though,
I am screaming loud,
screaming and shrieking
for my life,
these thoughts and feelings
wrap their ghostly boney fingers
around my mouth.
Not allowing any sound
make it's way out.

How am I supposed to be okay
When I can't even express the way
that I am feeling?
I want to tear my skin off my bones.
Pick my ligaments and throw them
away.
& Cause destruction to any part of my soul.
Because these thoughts...
these thoughts...
make me hate the why
I perceive myself.