Connect The Dots | Teen Ink

Connect The Dots

January 5, 2014
By EmmaClaire0823 GOLD, Bay Minette, Alabama
EmmaClaire0823 GOLD, Bay Minette, Alabama
13 articles 0 photos 102 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be the change you wish to see in the world."


Point One
My parent's gifts of bitter resentment
opened behind locked doors in the form of words
Point Two
oil bubbling up from beneath
spilling into sight on the surface of my skin
Point Three
beaten down with clubs of laughter
stabs of isolation
and fists of neglect
Point Four
my innocence stolen in the night
lost under the pressure of heavy flesh
Point Five
cerebral black smoke crawling down my throat
into my heart poisoning the remainder of my life
These are the dots that line my wrist
I connect them with a knife



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This article has 8 comments.


JRaye PLATINUM said...
on Sep. 24 2014 at 7:00 pm
JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
43 articles 10 photos 523 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;If you build your house far enough away from Trouble, then Trouble will never find you.&quot;<br /> <br /> &quot;Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, &#039;I just don&#039;t care.&#039;?&quot;

Holy...I don't even have words...amazing. Truly.

on Sep. 24 2014 at 12:08 pm
AprilNicoleJones BRONZE, New Castle, Indiana
4 articles 0 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I write only because<br /> there is a voice within me<br /> that will not be still.&quot;<br /> ~ SYLVIA PLATH<br /> <br /> (MY FORMER ACCOUNTS: Icantwrite &amp; Punk.Snowflake)<br /> Published poems from my former accounts:<br /> - FRAIL HOPE (Icantwrite)<br /> - YOURSELF (Punk.Snowflake)

Wow...what can I say. This is one of those poems that when I finish reading it I have to sit back and think for a minute, because it left me with such a deep emotional impact. I just kinda had to process it for a second...Anyway, the word I think of when I read this is: anger. There's a lot of anger behind this poem, and I think you did an excellent job of channeling that. I love the metaphor of connect the dots - connecting all of the tragedies and depression of life. I relate to it on a very deep and personal level (I've gone through some similar things mentioned in this poem). This is very emotionally charged and I love how you connected so many large emotions into one poem while keeping it short and yet vividly descriptive. Well done! :)

on Mar. 29 2014 at 11:55 am
SaphiraBrightscales DIAMOND, Islamabad, Other
75 articles 16 photos 1136 comments

Favorite Quote:
I&#039;ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. <br /> - Maya Angelou <br /> When i was little/I used to point a chubby finger toward the dark sky/And ask my father/why some stars moved and others didn&rsquo;t/He would laugh and explain that some were airplanes/I still wish on them today ~ Laugh-It-Out<br /> The feathers of a crow are black/The ink of my pen is blacker/The pain of my heart is blackest~ Mckay<br /> If love produced a blossom/I&rsquo;d take it in my palm/What a blessing, the bright color!/How soothing, such a balm!/I&rsquo;d keep a petal for my own/The rest, drop from my hands/For such a flower would multiply/And populate the lands~ thesilentraven<br /> And I began to rival legends/Long entombed before my birth./But for all my much envied fame/The lust for more would not abate./The plaques and prizes with my name/Will, like all things, disintegrate. ~ TheEpic95 now known as Helena_Noel

And you say you need help with your writing.

on Mar. 29 2014 at 11:54 am
SaphiraBrightscales DIAMOND, Islamabad, Other
75 articles 16 photos 1136 comments

Favorite Quote:
I&#039;ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. <br /> - Maya Angelou <br /> When i was little/I used to point a chubby finger toward the dark sky/And ask my father/why some stars moved and others didn&rsquo;t/He would laugh and explain that some were airplanes/I still wish on them today ~ Laugh-It-Out<br /> The feathers of a crow are black/The ink of my pen is blacker/The pain of my heart is blackest~ Mckay<br /> If love produced a blossom/I&rsquo;d take it in my palm/What a blessing, the bright color!/How soothing, such a balm!/I&rsquo;d keep a petal for my own/The rest, drop from my hands/For such a flower would multiply/And populate the lands~ thesilentraven<br /> And I began to rival legends/Long entombed before my birth./But for all my much envied fame/The lust for more would not abate./The plaques and prizes with my name/Will, like all things, disintegrate. ~ TheEpic95 now known as Helena_Noel

I agree with lifeaccordingtoawallflower, though it is an utter tragedy the poem describes, it is most definitely not one itself. I have never written such a poem myself and always find it incredibly difficult to convey such emotions hence this stands out to me even more. And then as you said you wrote it from someone else's perspective, that just makes it all the more amazing. just wow. Also, The structure worked brilliantly! 

on Jan. 10 2014 at 9:59 am
EmmaClaire0823 GOLD, Bay Minette, Alabama
13 articles 0 photos 102 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Be the change you wish to see in the world.&quot;

It isn't based on myself, but a person I talked out of suicide a few weeks ago. She had gone through hell, I had never written a dark poem, and I felt inspired. Thank you. 

on Jan. 10 2014 at 9:04 am
lifeaccordingtoawallflower BRONZE, Somewhere, Indiana
4 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;So, I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we&#039;ll never know most of them. But even if we don&#039;t have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from there.&quot;

This is tragic, yet beautiful. It flows very smoothly, and is contradictory to the message being sent, which is an amazing thing to accomplish. I find nothing wrong with this poem, you are a brilliant writer!

on Jan. 9 2014 at 6:18 pm
RoyalCorona SILVER, Grand Rapids, Michigan
7 articles 0 photos 290 comments

Favorite Quote:
All of us fave failed to match our dream of perfection. I rate us on the basis of our splendid failure to do the impossible. -William Faulkner

Sorry, typo there. I meant bring not what I had put! Sorry! :)

on Jan. 9 2014 at 6:17 pm
RoyalCorona SILVER, Grand Rapids, Michigan
7 articles 0 photos 290 comments

Favorite Quote:
All of us fave failed to match our dream of perfection. I rate us on the basis of our splendid failure to do the impossible. -William Faulkner

Wow! This was really powerful and I hope that it was not based on real life experiences because that would make it even more terrifying than it already is in my head. If it is based on a real life experience, I am sorry that you have had that happen to you and want to tell you that you matter. You beingg light into the world with your words and don't you ever forget that.