Long days

Long nights

Long afternoons that turn into long nights

Which then turn into long days


I have no one to converse with


I have no one who’d be willing to listen


Pity me

Pathetic me

No one sympathizes


I really have no reason

To want to die

But inevitably

I still want to


My head rests in the palms of my hands

I feel sweaty

I feel sticky from salty tears

Oh, and that runny nose

I can barely breathe






I can barely breathe while I sob

Mom comes in

It’s two in the morning

She has work

She thinks I’m pathetic

I know I am


I scream at her to get out

She slams the hollow door

To my room

To a terrorizing place inside my mind

Where she has just enclosed me

Forever

Maybe only for the night


But a night is like forever


I will never fall asleep now


And when I do

Well, it just means I’ll

Sleep ‘til the afternoon







And then I’ll wake up

I’ll know I have wasted most of my day

Sleeping

Sleeping because I couldn’t sleep the night before


Soon though, it’ll be night again

Soon it’ll feel like forever again

Soon I will cry and get sticky in my own tears, snot, and saliva again


Long night

Long day

Long night

Long day.