My brain is full of memories
Memories are like a museum
And a gym
Museums of your memories
In every corner and crevices of my head
Hangs a frame of a moving picture
Of a memory I once lived
Next to some of those pictures
Lay a treadmill
9 year old me running from
The fear that still haunts me
The darkest inching closer just to watch myself
Run faster almost falling into the black abyss
Museum of your memories
Unable to escape.
Haven’t left in years
Not sure if I want to
Got stuck in childhood dreams
Lifting weights of what I once thought I could hold
Now knowing I’m crushing under the weight of this
Long lost child dream to know
What loves like
My first love is trapped in there
Knowing it or not
Just floating in the pool as older memories
Swim around what I thought I knew best
I never really met you but once I finally did
You were with my best friend
It took me over 3 months to realize you were a coward
Yet I still whisper I’m sorry
I wish I could control my own memories
I’m stuck in this museum that keeps haunting me
I’m trying to pause the memories they keep spinning around me
But the past keeps screaming at me
Trapped in this museum we aren’t living,
We are watching ourselves live.
It’s like a stopped watch unable to tick
It’s easy to get trapped here but there’s an exit in each room.
Living in a life full of past memories,
But it’s harder and harder to get near them.
When you don’t know what could be on the other side for you.