I am heartless
because I have yet to find love.
Not even a relationship but,
the feeling of being loved in general.
So how can I love someone else
if love does not know my face?
So I am selfish.
Because if it seems no one else can
love me,
I will love myself.
I will be my own rock.

And Jesus is supposed to be this
"example of love,"
but it is so abstract.
How can I know he died
so I can live,
when I'm here anyway?
I wasn't put here by choice.
I'm just here waiting on this example of love to appear.
Forcing myself to believe in
something or someone
I'm not even sure exists
because it's my only thread.
The only line that gives me hope
that something has to be
better than the tears I crey
every night from feeling nothing but loneliness and emptiness in a world surrounded by blank countenances.

And it seems the closest feeling to it,
is what they tell me is the farthest.
When someone takes time
to take care of every cell of my skin,
until I feel nothing
but peace and a heartbea tpumping throughout,
that is telling me I am alive,
telling me I am wanted.
When someone lightly strokes each strand of my hair,
and touches my lipslike a feather with his.
When he tells me in that moment,
he needs me.
And I am all his mind.
How can this not be love,
when is the only time I don't think?
I just feel.
Because love is a feeling right?