when I see them
they remind me of my life.
They, like me, can swim
with the grace of a three legged elephant.
They also, like me, fly
X-22 Fighter Spacecrafts,
the standard space assault vehicles
before the war even began.
they attack enemy Pterodactyl Fighters,
which are giant Bi-Planes
with a fissionary chamber at the back
allowing them to reach tremendous speeds.
If we ever hit that,
their ship blows up
with the force of a micro super nova.
It’s blinding
with its voice of destruction.
I can feel the light sing to my eyes,
it calls to my soul.

I later join forces with Samuel L. Jackson
during the battle on Normandy Beach
in France.
Our job is to
take out the Nazi Dinosaurs
which are mostly carnivores,
the desired habit for German dinosaurs.
I lied earlier,
the narwhals don’t fly X-22s
they actually fly Z-31s
which are upgraded with hyperspace engines,
with fully automatic laser cannons,
they can also turn invisible
to both eyes and radar.
They were ordered by Rainbow Pony Space Command,
the military center for the Mystical Animal Allies,
who are enemies of the Realistic Axis Animals.
The narwhals mowed down the Dinosaurs
using the twin laser cannons
to turn the Dinosaurs into ash.

Apatosaurus Hitler tried to kill us
using his epic banana launcher,
which is known to blow up
anything magical.
Before he could,
one of the Mystic Animal Allies spies snuck behind him
and shouted out,
“Bang-bang skit-skit.”
Our spy ran off after that and
he was never seen again,
presumed to be caught by the Nazis.
Hitler called in his allied forces,
the Kami-Kaze Flying Squirrels of Japan,
they tried to crash into the Twin Towers of Puniness.
I did an insane
72,000 degree kick flip
sending them back to the moon
in which they created
the image we know today
as the man on the moon.
They were met up with crazy karate moves
from both Feel My-Arm’s-Strong
and Fuzzed All-In.

Afterwards the Giants of Tininess
were greeting Adamus Prime with applause.
I never knew they were about to betray me,
but it was too late for that information.
I was told that
the Midgets of Tallness would soon invade my homeland
with the Giants of Tininess.
When I arrived there to stop them,
the Giants of Tininess
held me back and tried to kill me.
I soon shouted,
“Why are you doing this?!”
They replied with,
“Raust mit du!” (away with you)
which made no sense,
but they all began to fire on me and Samuel.
My trusty stapler,
named Staple My-Papers-Much
he would save our lives
by being insanely awesome and
doing a backwards spin kick
into the leader,
Sudam Who-Said?!’s groin.
He blew up with the force of a trillion nukes,
flying approximately 2.7 Billion Kilometers Per Hour,
until he hit his head
on the surface of pluto,
knocking it out of it orbit,
giving it that strange orbit
we know today.
Then both
Yo-Mama Been Laughin
and
Kim’s Gone Ill
both looked at each other
and tried to run away.
We stopped them
and punted them into the sun.
we would later call this day,
Easter,
because we kicked them so hard,
Jesus was reborn.
And he would help us on our next journey,
my life as a narwhal.