I am a pushover
I never yell
I listen to too much too often
sometimes I laugh too much,
and sometimes, I don't laugh enough
sometimes I hear things I shouldn't.
I am dramatic
sometimes everything everyone says changes the world
little pebbles tossed into a lake
I guess I'm just waiting for enough strength
to pick up enough pebbles,
or gather enough people,
to make a splash so large
it rocks the boat out in the middle of a large ocean
I am a descendant
of unspoken laws.
there is not a rule I don't follow
and when I'm in trouble,
I argue my way back out.
I want to be a teacher
(I've always liked bossing people around)
but I'm not sure I have the patience.
I want to be a singer
but I'm not positive I'm up for the job.
I am a writer
no matter what
even when someone else,
even when it seems everyone else,
is better than me,
I am a writer
and I will never stop
because writing is not a competition
Writing is the hallowed out truth
that waits to spring itself on you.
Writing is a rant everyone will listen to
writing is peace
anger, grief, and joy
Writing is a messy and complicated,
but writing is me.
I am pushover
I don't always like to yell
and I don't break rules
but one day I'm sure I'll wonder; "What the hell?"
I don't swear often (I swear all the time)
people call me an angel
and I guess I am
an angel
and a heart-breaker
and a worn out
plain old girl
I am ugly
and I am beautiful
and for stupid reasons
call myself fat.
I am modest and vain
I'm not quite sure who I am yet
but I know
I am a writer
and a girl
who just wants to change the world.
I am a pushover
and I don't make bets
but if I did?
I'd tell you if I have yet to touch your life,
wait for me.
because I will.