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growing pains .
walked down the same long hallway full of so many people
my anxiety always forced me to keep a forward momentum, keep my head down
one day i had the nerve to look up and meet your wandering eyes
our entire friendship flashed before my eyes as if it were a trailer to the movie of our lives
i gave up many things in my life for you that caused me to lose focus
my grades and attendance slipped but i didn't care because i was happy
i was where i wanted to be with the one person i thought cared
the end of school was nearing and every second we spent, he was always there
like the flea on a dog, he never left your side
for a while i was overjoyed to see you finally living out your dreams with a boy
until the summer days came and you became distant
making any and every excuse to avoid me
even when we did get to hangout, he was there or you were always on your phone texting him
i always felt selfish wishing for my best friend back
but now i realize you weren't my best friend
you were just a terrible influence
manipulated me into thinking certain things were okay
but a best friend would never trade me for a boy
i pushed away so many people that were real friends all for you
i bought you things
posted you
talked about you
prayed for you
i put my entire soul into making sure you felt cared for
because i knew what it was like to not feel loved at all for you
you were my best friend, you deserved the world
how silly i was
i wish in all these growing pains, that this would've been the one thing someone prepared me for
i lost a part of myself, because i assumed you became distant because of me
of something i did or said
in all honesty, i hope he ends up breaking your heart
so you feel the emptiness
the loneliness
i felt for 4 months of my life
i had no one
and you even didn't bat an eye
because you never cared
i hope you realize how much your life sucks without me in it
realize that you will never have a friend as good as me
realize that ive never hurt you the way others have
realize
i did you right, yet you still did me wrong
never. ever. make a promise you cannot keep.
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