As I sit beside you,

Catching the words rolling from your tongue

I feel the arms of your mouth wrap around me,

I am not alone

Your words line up to make a long thin stick,

It pokes the fat on my stomach

which pushes my laughter up and out,

The stick goes to my mouth,

It extends my lips on each end to create a crescent moon,

It then goes down and touches my hand,

It disappears,

Its your hand,

You place your fingers in the space between mine,

We create a lock, complicated to see, and to break apart,

I never move away,

I have no reason to leave the grasp you have on me,

But I can’t help thinking, what if?

Me and loneliness are from the same side of the magnet,

We cannot attach,

I’ve never been with myself at brunch, lunch, class,

I avoid that state,

But only because everyone around me has the negative to their positive

I can be alone, 

but not here, 

When my feet walk the elevated stage,

With a long red gown dragging behind my legs,

I will touch the folder that transports me out,

I’ll never see her again, 

Or her best friend that torments me of her lingering,

While everyone has a stack of magnets at their tail,

And they attract the best objects that scratch at laughter and tears

I have none, 

but what if I stop looking?

I won’t compare if there’s no one to compare to,

I won’t get the green and purple bruises on my flesh

because the magnets are attaching themselves to everyone but me,

That edged stone won’t penetrate my head,

if I stop screaming at the magnets of what I can provide

Either way I don’t have the strength for them to connect to

Drowned in thoughts that crowd my throat,

I don’t have the positive to my negative, 

I don’t have someone to attach to

If I let go, I’ll find a new set of magnets that can be my opposite,

Ones that let me roam but also follow,

I need to breach out of this imprisoning magnetic field, 

But that means,

I have to leave you too

                                                                                        – Leylani M