I remember when I first locked my sweet tender eyes unto yours

I got lost in those honey brown eyes

It felt safe

I remember being intimidated by your tall bulky figure

But that tension eased when I saw your beaming bright smile

It felt like home

I remember when we cuddled until we both fell asleep

Our arms locking into each other’s delicate warm embrace

It was home

These perfect prized memories live rent-free in my head

But…

They are not real

If only you were real…

I took comfort in you as I fell asleep

Like how a kind caring mother comforts her sweet innocent child

I indulged in this entirely fake reality living in my head

Consumed by your everlasting love

Where we lived a long happy life

Saw nothing but clear blue skies day in and day out

And had each other’s delicate warm embrace

But I get snapped out of my perfect little lie every time I open my tired drowsy eyes

Every time I hear that dang cursed alarm go ~RING~

Then my soft tender heart drops in sadness

I wonder what life could have been like

If you were not just some fictitious figment of my imagination 

That served as an escape from this horrible nightmarish reality

The reality that gut-punched me every day to snap me out of it 

The reality with dark gray skies 

The reality with pure chaos and stress around every corner

The reality with no one to embrace

I tread through each long day waiting till I can leave and

Go back to my truly happy place

Go back to you my charming beloved sweetheart

Go back to your delicate warm embrace

I left

I can now go back

One, Two, Three

I’m home

I take in your honey brown eyes

Your beaming bright smile

And your delicate warm embrace

Sigh… If only you were real