i’m okay, she says
and she is
if okay is standing on a
cliff, failing to
take in the view because
she can’t bear to fall


falling means life or death
and an emotional plummet
isn’t always fatal but
to her
it’s the end of the world


she allows her mind to
wander to the last thing that
made her happy
and realizes she can’t
pinpoint it


nerves clench her
consistently and if she makes
a false step she could
find herself at
the bottom of a canyon
before she notices


tears teeter at the corner of her eyes
but no, she’s okay and
they seemingly disappear
but she knows
they’re right there


she’s not numb
she’s not depressed
on the surface,
she’s perfectly fine.
she smiles and waves,
treats people with kindness
and plays her violin
dexterously, daintily,
elegantly.


others have it worse than she does
and there’s no
physical pain that’s
harming her
it’s all internal
and you can’t believe
what you can’t see


how are you?
the only truly acceptable answer
to both herself and
the rest of the world:
i’m okay.