Twas the night before christmas, and all through the house.
The washer was stirring and washing the blouse.
The clock struck midnight, and the bell went off.
The baby was crying, then farted, and coughed.
My mom was putting ornaments on our tree.
Then, she got up and had to go pee.
Theres a bottle of eggnog left on our stoop.
She grabbed it, and drank it, then had to go poop.
She went to the attic to grab the gift.
The child got up, she had to be swift.
The child asked if santa had arrived.
But, in this weather he unlikely survived.
The child went to bed after grabbing a drink.
My mom was so stressed she puked in the sink.
Some time later.....
Its soon time for the children to wake.
When my mom realized she had made a mistake.
She opened the oven, as her face started to clam.
She said to herself "I forgot the christmas ham!"
She preheated the oven, and threw it all in.
She walked out the back door, with an upset kind of grin.
"Gifts, and stockings, and presents galore!"
"That is not what christmas is for!"
"If christmas is so merry, then why is it so poor?"
She went inside and opened the stuff.
She said "Hey! This isn't so tough"
We went down the hill in our snowy sleds.
The we went home to rest our sleepy heads.
This holiday season's filled with joy and cheer!
So have a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!