“A Fraction of My Life” by Hawksfollow 

Age 16, I wish that I was smart, oh what I’d give to be clever.

Oh what a stupid wish if only my mind from body I could sever. 

Age 16, I wrote a poem about a girl in a lake

Some may say it’s so profound, to me it’s average give or take.

Age 13, “how to write a poem” when do rhymes end and stanzas fall?

I can never find a rhythm, before I finish, I’ll withdraw. 

Right now this poem isn’t going how I expected it at all,

I wanted to write about my trauma, or give tribute to my dog.

Age around 10 I found a book of poetry I think that moment changed my life,

Now I write to, “shape my future?” no I write to save my life.

At age 14, I just can’t stand it

There is just too much commotion, 

All I want to do is die and just call it a self remotion. 

I get beaten and abused, every single option, 

I am scared because my mind is facing evil thought corruption.

Age 13 I’m now in 8th grade and my mind begins to race

Memories flood back to me and not at my own pace. 

Thank God for a sweet lady who to her I give away,

All my secrets and what I remember in an attempt to escape this state.

Age 12, I seek God for help and I think I found some faith,

I know to live is Christ so when I die I’ll surely gain. 

And I know that if I kill myself I’ll be nothing but a coward, 

But it’s silly to ever think like that because for my pain he gives me power. 

Age 15, I’m at my lowest lows, I try to take my life, 

After that I’m under watch. It’s not my fault there’s too much strife.

Now I can’t go to the bathroom without being scanned for a knife.

Age 11 I write more seriously, this is what I want to be. 

I finish my first book even though the ending is rushed and sort of crappy. 

Everybody loves it, it even made them weep, 

I am so very excited, on the road to an author-to-be.

I think age 9 I move again. It’s alright ‘cuz it’s a house

Yesterday I caught some birds, so today I’ll catch a mouse. 

We got a little puppy, he is so cute and fluffy.

His name is Augustus McCrae but I just call him Gussy. 

He’ll be with us forever and we’ll make eachother very happy.

I am 8. The divorce was finalized some time ago. 

I feel empty and lonely because I finally said “no”. 

Age 7, I saw a cow for the first time and really want a horse,

I did want to live in the country but did not want a divorce.

Age 5, My mother cries in her room sometimes, because father makes her sad

Everyone thinks I am sleeping but I hear everything, sometimes it’s really bad. 

But not as bad as nine years from now everything has turned to ash. 

At least my wounds begin to heal, no longer an open gash. 

Age 10 take away 6, first time I am raped. 

Shortly after came addiction that my eyes could not escape.

Yes I am so addicted that I just can’t look away, 

And I can never go a single day without getting a taste. 

And at school I can not focus, my mind is so deranged,

When I try to make new friends they always think that I am strange. 

Age 3, last night I snuck to read,

In the morning I come to  realize that those books have made me dream. 

My mom taught me to ride a bike, I never needed training wheels,

When my brother runs away I get him, kicking up my heels. 

Age 2, I meet my sister, she’s cute and all of that,

14 years from now I’ll take it back, “I’d rather have a hat.” 

Before age 1, my brother drops me,

I fly into the door,

I’m alright but he is crying, the doorknob wasn’t where it was before.

An October evening,

They get to greet me,

I’m finally at age o. 

16 years from now, my sister will say

Someday I’ll save us all. 

Age 16, I wrote a poem about a fraction of my life

I see now how I’ve become adapted to the times. 

If all I learned is all I know, I’ll be grateful till I die,

I think it’s time to stop this number poem until it gets too dry.

Even if I’m not a hero or a martyr or a saint and I might not save us all,

But in a fraction of my time.

Here is a fraction of my life.