I am tired. 

I am tired waiting around for things to be different. I am tired of the uncertainty and instability. I am tired of never knowing what is coming and hating the idea of change. I want things to be the same, and familiar. I want to feel warm and invited when I go anywhere, and know that it will still be there. Instead the idea of change swoops me up into a hurricane of emotions. Not knowing the way out, because there is only darkness. I am exhausted and overwhelmed. I am a teenager, still trying to figure who I am and only seeing who I want to be. I am too young for half of the things I want to do, and too old for the rest. I am tired of trying to tell them how I really feel, only to be shut down. I am tired of feeling like I have no control over my own life. I am tired of having so many feelings, but not a single way to express them. I am tired of being asked why I am upset, only to tell them and being pushed away. I am tired of wanting to be different, and have familiarity. I am tired…  

 But most of all,

 I am tired of shouting to be heard, only to be silenced.