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Who I Really Am
May 1, 2009
Thoughts of you
Keep running through
My weary head
Like a river
Do you see me
Sanding near you
The answer is no
Your arms are wrapped
Around her neck
In a sickening way
With love and tenderness
In your deep dangerous eyes
I wish you would see
What you mean to me
But that is just a fantasy
Unravel your arms
From round her neck
And see who I really am
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 21 comments.
bookworm75 SILVER said...
on Dec. 31 2009 at 10:00 am
I loved it, so great, Thanks for the comment on one of the articles i wrote. The dad I never knew. Your a greatg writer. btw
Katie_Potatie PLATINUM said...
on Aug. 10 2009 at 9:19 pm
Omg!! This is amazing. It's fantastic. Your fantastic. I love it so much. and thanks for commenting on mine. im glad u liked it.
jennee21_ann GOLD said...
on Aug. 4 2009 at 9:40 pm
hey this is really really good! i love how you wrote this short, sweet but with HEART!! would you mind checking out my work and commenting?
great job!
great job!
pinksage33 BRONZE said...
on Jun. 30 2009 at 4:33 pm
Joanna said...
on Jun. 28 2009 at 8:51 pm
I love the way you used short lines to write your poem. I think it would work well if you seperated the line, "The answer is no" from the rest of the verse (it helps to sort out the events). My, it is wonderful. You certainly have talent Pinksage33. Nicely done!
amyxu said...
on Jun. 25 2009 at 11:46 pm
Hey, nice poem. I like the flow of it a lot, the words flow so naturally. One suggestion, in the last stanza the word "round" seemed a little bit out of place compared to the formal tone of the rest of the poem. So maybe it cold be changed to "around." This is of course your decision entirely. Good job and keep writing!
GinaThompson01 SILVER said...
on Jun. 24 2009 at 10:28 pm
this is really good!!
thanks for reading my essay .
:)
thanks for reading my essay .
:)
pinksage33 BRONZE said...
on Jun. 23 2009 at 10:38 pm
JamminJos23 GOLD said...
on Jun. 23 2009 at 7:56 pm
this poem is really good and i cant wait to read more of ur work...
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND said...
on Jun. 23 2009 at 6:27 pm
totally worth clicking on! ITS AWESOME!
Lonleydandy said...
on Jun. 21 2009 at 4:37 pm
It was REALLY good. I can totally relate!!!!
pinksage33 BRONZE said...
on Jun. 16 2009 at 2:18 pm
i submitted 2 more articals and i will b wrighting more. so keep your eyes open. thanks for the comments ppl.
rokie101 said...
on Jun. 16 2009 at 2:13 am
wow i love it!!!! its really deep!!!
SmileyRiley PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 14 2009 at 4:01 am
i love it. you commented on my article called Knock off Jeans and boots with the faux (thanks btw) and so i thought i would check out your poem. this is wonderful!
11 articles 0 photos 378 comments
Favorite Quote:
Now Cinderella don't you go to sleep, it's such a bitter form of refuge, oh don't you know the kingdom's under siege, and everbody needs you. - The Killers
I really like this and I think it's so relatable and true. Great work and really well written, I was a bit weary of it at first, but then I started reading it and it was just great!
Think you could check out my work sometime? My poem Broken Barbie Doll is kinda similar to this.