When I grow up, I’ll make a strong emotional connection with my kids. When I grow up, I’ll listen to my children and give them validation. When I grow up, I’ll be as open as I can, accepting new ideas. When I grow up, I’ll be sure to never mimic the mistakes my parents did.

Parents do the best they can, and it seems as generations pass, parents become more aware of what to do and what not to do. While this is beneficial and inspiring, certain trends just stay like the red lipstick, a white shirt, or the little black dress that are harmful to all ages.

The generation who raised us forgot that we have emotions. Most Baby Boomers and Generation X brush off that we’re people who simply can’t suck it up or wish it away. The people who raised us forgot that they were once raised the same way by people who were taught the same thing. And it doesn’t make sense why they wouldn’t see our perspective nor will it ever be acceptable to deny these problems. Because a problem is a problem despite what circumstances. Empathy should not be given exclusively, but for everyone who feels pained. Suffering is not a contest, but a common event in a human’s life. So tell me why credibility plunges when I am a teenager. Tell me why the moment I disclaim I am a suffering teen, I’m told it’s nothing but hormones or some unrelated event. Because that’s what causes suicide rates and other mental diseases. Environmental factors. Things that can be controlled.

It seems that as we get older, saying your feelings is just plain stigma. Kids are the most honest because of their innocence. That’s why we laugh when we hear their opinions because it’s so rare for anyone older to be that blunt. It’s funny after you realize that young kids experience this unfortunate event of holding back. After a while when that kid grows a bit older, their feelings become irrelevant. If they’re being teased, it’s brushed off as affectionate. If a child makes a fuss about being hurt, they’re overreacting. Maybe this is why some children crave attention, why some people in this world need attention. Because they’re just neglected from the care they need and deserve. This is possibly why we as teenagers and adults have no real emotional connection to our parents. If you really had one, why are you so afraid to tell them what you feel?

I think from all these experiences, the stigma just develops people who grow disgust to sensitivity. That being emotional is weak, frail, and feeble. But what I think is completely opposite. Being in touch with your feelings and having someone that will listen is beautiful. It’s that pure bliss of knowing you as a person matter, that you as a person are perceived as important. Parents need to start listening to their children. They need to understand that feelings aren’t something to be toyed with, but to be delicate with. The adult has more knowledge, and that’s just logical. But, the younger people deserve what the older generations deserved and wanted too; a trusted person who would not judge your problems. In order to get rid of this vicious cycle, we must agree upon this idea. We must get rid of the stigma behind the subject. We must promise ourselves to learn from our parents mistakes. We must be the person our younger selves wanted around.