The music world. It is the industry where dreams are made, and, if not dreams, at least stars. More popular than writers, more famous than politicians, who wouldn’t want to be a pop star? The only issue with this is that, of course, an incredible amount of luck is involved in gaining that stardom, and it is not possible to write an essay on how to be lucky. It is much less luck-reliant, however, to be able to write songs like the mega-hits of today, and today you’ll learn to do just that. In only a few simple steps - a beat, melody, lyrics, and image, you can make a song that will be a smash hit… or at least resemble one.

Most pop songs can be quickly recognized by those who have heard them a few times from their beats. Almost every radio hit is at least somewhat dependant on a beat that is appealing for whatever reason, often its ability to be danced to and the exciting qualities of the rhythm. This is one of the most difficult steps to accomplish, as it requires at least some modicum of musical know-how. There are a few tricks to make creating a beat easier, however. The first is repetitiveness. Rather than come up with a whole new beat for the chorus, or bother with a different sounding bridge, you can simply reuse the same exact 2-4 bars of music for the entire song. Another solution is to use, for the 15 billionth time, The Four Chords. These chords, used in everything from Pachabel’s Cannon to Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey to With or Without You by U2 and still today, are extremely simple but still effective. Just listen to any of the songs I mentioned previously to hear them.

Sometimes, it can also be difficult to decide exactly what instruments to use on the beat. There’s a great variety of them out there, from strings to brass to exotic instruments like the didgeridoo or what not. The simplest route is to pick low percussion instruments and either piano or strings for the top of the beat. Interesting instruments, like trumpet, flute, etc., can be used, but are best selected for playing bits of the melody. Creating a complex, intricate backing track and relying on the vocals of the singer is unnecessarily difficult and risky.

If all of this beat work sounds too difficult, don’t fret. You have a powerful ally, and that ally is a producer. They have the skills and training to make even the most boring of club dance beats, although some expend unneeded effort on creating something people can think about. These men and women are responsible for creating the framework of the song, unlike in the days when bands played actually instruments and the producer was more for cleaning up and organizing the track. Strangely, they receive little recognition from the public, which explains why some of the more efficient, less energy - wasting producers like to put sound clips over the start of the song, which is an excellent way to get a reputation without bothering with quality.

The beat, of course, is secondary to the melody of your song. The melody is the aspect of the song that the most people will remember, and therefore it is important to make sure it is memorable. Specifically, the song must be catchy, so that it gets stuck in listeners’ heads and they are forced to seek it out again and again. It is difficult to explain in writing what makes a melody good, as I can hardly sing you examples through the paper, but there are still some guidelines to keep in mind. As I said, the melody should be catchy, which means it should be simple. Try various collections of notes in simple patterns, and see which ones lodge firmly in your brain. It’s much more important that the melody be catchy than emotionally evocative or intricate. Of course, the melody also has to fit with the beat, which should be relatively simple if you followed my beat creation guidelines, especially with the four chords. The placement of the melody is also important. By this I mean how high or low it is in the singer’s range. This is especially important with men. The melody should be extremely high, as having anyone with a semblance of bass in their voice suggests age, and we hardly want to remind our audience that one day they will be old. All this is despite the fact that many young men do actually have rather low voices - convention says pop songs for males should be high, and challenging convention is exactly that: far too challenging. Sometimes, if you really want to use a low voice, just pitch-shift one of the performers, so as to avoid the terror of the bass singer. With women, it is less important whether the melody is high or low, although it is good to avoid being too extreme with either of these, as it makes it difficult to sing along. It is surprisingly not important to find a way to fit the melody to your singer’s vocal range, as studio correction can fix mistakes and make shaky notes sound just fine.

As for lyrics, there are multiple different approaches that can be taken, largely dependant on the style of music in question and the personality and appearance of the singer. The first approach is to make the lyrics safe and unthreatening. This is an ancient tradition, dating all the way back to the 1920s or even earlier. This approach works especially well with younger performers, like boy bands, teen idols, or former child actors, whose audiences are similarly young. It also makes your song more appealing to middle-aged and older listeners, as it doesn’t have any of that dangerous interestingness. Often, these are love songs, but without any of the sexual or unpleasant aspects of love. The second approach is to be shocking and provocative. This approach works well with older performers, as well as those younger performers who have outgrown their target audience and need something to make them relevant again. Shocking and provocative, however, need not truly be threatening or thought-provoking, however. Rather than discussing important, divisive issues like race or politics, simply throw in lots of references to violence, sex, alcohol, or drugs. Again, these need not be new thoughts on these topics, or really thoughts at all, but simply references to them. There is a third option, of course, which is to write a truly heartfelt, deep song. This has occasionally brought people fame, notably singer-songwriters or rappers who actually write their own lyrics and use them to illustrate their lives and experiences or philosophies. However, it is hardly required, and there’s no reason to waste your time trying to be Bob Dylan when, let’s be honest, there’s no way he could get a song on the hit parade today.

Speaking of rappers, it’s worth briefly mentioning rap lyrics here, in case the song you’re trying to write is of that genre. Here, only the second two categories work, as hip-hop has never been a genre known for its family-friendly, non-threatening lyrics. Mostly, the second choice will be your go-to option, as trying to tell a story or make a point while rhyming and fitting a meter is just too much effort, and the violence-alcohol-drugs school of writing is actually strongly influenced by rap in the first place. Of course, originally those topics were discussed by rappers from areas where those were prevalent, dangerous parts of their lives and their songs dealt with how that affected them, but that level of depth is no longer necessary now that they can simply be glorified in order to be shocking.

As important as any of this may seem to be, it all fades away when compared with the glorious emperor of pop, the Image. This section will deal with choosing a performer and grooming them to sell your song. All art, really, benefits somewhat from image - Beethoven is extra famous for being an irritable, mostly deaf man, Edgar Allan Poe’s popularity was bolstered by his almost rockstar-esque life (creepy romance, alcohol, and depressing Romantic poetry), and Van Gogh took the art world by the ear and dragged it along.

In order to create the desired image, you’ll need to find someone with the right appearance, name, personality, and differentiating quirk. Appearance is extremely important in today’s pop world, which of course is only logical in an auditory medium. Usually, the performer should be very physically attractive and fit the standard for conventional modern beauty. If you have any questions about what that means, simply watch almost any given music video made recently (although avoid a few notable exceptions, such as Adele or Ce Lo Green, as well as any older star who returned for a song or two). If this appearance factor is not attainable, this can potentially be used in the differentiating quirk category, which will be discussed later. As for a name, the actual legal name of the performer is fairly unimportant, but the one on their singles, albums, etc., is vital to success. Flashy is the name of the game here, if you will forgive me the pun. The stage name of the performer need not be overly outlandish, but it should have some kind of sparkle that makes it stick out. For example, a name that formerly made it in music, Ralph Vaughan Williams, would never fly today. Obviously, the Ralph has to go. As some sort of European dance producer, Vaughan could probably work, and R.V. Williams wouldn’t be horrible as a pop singer’s name. Sometimes, however, the name should just go entirely, and be replaced with something entirely new, like Lady Gaga, Sting, Prince, or Slash. With rap names, creativity could be used, but it’s easier just to slap an adjective like ‘young’, ‘big’, ‘lil’’, ‘cool’, etc., on to a word like ‘thug’ or ‘gangster’ and call it good. Personality, similarly, can be controlled, as, if the performer is a reasonably good actor, they can put on a facade at public events like press releases or concerts. It is also not important that their personality be particularly agreeable, as outbursts or disrespectful conduct can be a fame builder. Mostly, the personality should fit with the previously mentioned lyric types - nonthreatening lyrics go well with friendly, cute personalities, threatening lyrics with rude or dangerous personalities, and personal, well-written lyrics with real people (which is a dangerous choice, as listeners experience real people every day, so how interesting can they be?) The final component of image is to find a differentiating quirk for your performer. It doesn’t actually have to be anything at all to do with their music, just something to attract attention. As I said earlier, it could be an outside-the-mold body, although for this to best work it should be played up like some kind of shocking discovery rather than the fact that people come in various shapes. It can also be some sort of legal drama, romantic scandal, secret backstory, racist tweets… use your imagination. As long as the performer has something to make people talk about them, positively or negatively, you’re in good shape.

You are now prepared to begin the creation of your own smash hit. I cannot guarantee the results, as it is impossible to know when the public will suddenly be stricken with a hunger for some kind of substance in their music, but that is a danger that is truly impossible to be prepared for. The bottom line is this: long as your music can generate interest and/or controversy without being truly thought-provoking, you should be alright in today’s industry.