The Canadians have been watching us for too long, they just sit above us, watching, waiting, judging. The Canadians must be planning something, just look at them up there, they are waiting for us to become weak enough for their army to take, so they can be the country that took the great America. These people from the not so great white north must be taken care of soon, or else everyone in America will be finishing their sentences with an “eh?”, like a bunch of Fonzie wannabes! It has become clear that actions must be taken against Canada, in the form of a preemptive nuclear strike, one the Canadians will not see coming. It will not make America popular in the eyes of the world, but since when does America care about the other world?
To clarify all of this, to simplify this into one simple, easy sentence; Get Canada before Canada gets America.