I am me, but me does not always mean the same thing. As I walk through life, me changes. When I was younger, me meant happy, careless, free of responsibility, and free of worry. Now being me can be terrifying. I have to get a job and make my own money. I have to go to school everyday and come home just to do homework. I have to play a sport so I do not get left out. I have to hangout with my friends on the weekends so that I am not “lame”. I have to get a boyfriend so that I can find my husband. I have to workout and stay in shape so that I look good to the boys. I have to keep good grades so that I can get into college. I have to figure out what I want to be when I grow up so that I can have a stable life. I have to stay happy so that no one sees what is really going on. All of this while dealing with depression, anxiety, a bad father, toxic relationships, getting cheated on, getting used for my body, getting taken advantage of, best friends dying, changing schools, losing friends, and getting made fun of. How do I keep a good mindset when I get judged for everything I do? How do I get everything done when all I want to do is lay in bed and cry because of broken relationships? How do I trust people when I cannot even trust my own father? How do I love myself when it seems like the only good thing guys see in me is my body? How do I live a normal life when I do not feel so normal? How am I still alive when I am not so sure I should be? The first thing I do when I wake up is check my phone to see who wanted to talk to me while I was sleeping. The first thing I do when I see a mirror is examine every little detail on my body. The first thing I do when I am having relationship issues is blame myself. The first thing I do when I get hungry is debate on whether or not I actually need the food. The first thing I do when a guy leaves me is ask why I am not good enough, but this is not a call for help. This is a call to realization. I walk through life only caring about what other people think and how other people are feeling when I have all of these problems that I am not fixing. This is just reality now. This is how everyone is because of the world we live in. Afraid of walking alone in public because you will get kidnapped or violated. Posting your edited pictures on social media so everyone will think your life is perfect. Wondering how many carbs you ate today. This is how we all are now and we just say “that is just how life works”. Today I am taking control over my life and saying “no” to life just working. Because me is going to mean strong, brave, determined, healthy, beautiful inside and out, happy, powerful, fearless, and so much more. Me is better than a calorie counting app. Me is better than questioning what I am doing wrong. Me is better than all the guys who do not want me for me. Me deserves the world and I am going to achieve that no matter what I get put through.