It took a couple week to fully recover but when I did, my cutting went over-the-top.

It spread to my stomach and legs. I also became depressed so much that I could barely go through my marching band practices without my knees giving out at least once.

I had joined the marching band that summer. I was a bass drum player in drum line. Our captain, Mike, was like a big brother to me from the start. Probably because we’re similar in many ways. He’s pretty tall. About half a foot taller than me. He has black hair that’s pretty long.

One day after practice, I was on the steps of the school waiting for a ride. I hadn’t said a word to anyone all day and I could tell people were suspicious of me cutting again.

Almost everyone was gone and only Mike and Aaron from drum line were there. I felt comfortable so I put my face in my hands and cried.

Mike was next to me within a second and Aaron wasn’t far behind.

“What’s wrong?” Mike asked, worried.

“Everyone hates me. Including me.” I answered, still crying with my face in my hands.

“Dude… you’re not… cutting again. Are you?” he asked. I’m assuming he caught onto my depression.

I decided to show him. I took my jacket off, rolled up my pant legs, and lifted my shirt a little.

He quickly grabbed me, pulled me to my feet, and dragged me inside and to the boy’s bathroom. Aaron followed.

“You can’t do this man! If you go for too long… you’ll die! I’m taking you to therapy or something!” he yelled, not mad but concerned.

Aaron just stared in shock.

“Maybe I want to die!” I yelled through tears.

Slap! The sting was loud and sharp. Mike had me by the shoulders so I don’t fall. Good thing because I was feeling a bit weak-kneed.

“Never say that! Never! You should never want to die! There are so many people who need you!” he yelled. Then, he breathed, relaxing himself.

Tears were pouring now my cheeks noiselessly.

“Aaron’s coming over my house now. It’d probably be good for you to come too.” he said, much more calm now.

I nodded.

I called my parents, they agreed then Mike’s parents drove all of us to his house.
________

We had a good time at his house. I smiled for the first time in a while and we just hung out.

We played video games like the bunch of nerds we are and we just kind of chilled, talked and made jokes. Guy stuff.

When I did go home, I went straight to my room, picked up my laptop and went on Skype.

I saw that Sarah was on and I smiled huge. I clicked on her name then clicked the “video call” button. I smiled bigger when I saw her face pop up on the screen.

“Hey beautiful” I said cheerfully.

“Hey handsome,” she said smiling, “why you so cheerful tonight?”

“I just realized I’m the luckiest man on earth.”

“Why is that?”

“I have you as my girlfriend.”

Her face lit up and I knew I said something right and knowing that made my face light up too.

“I love you Sarah.”

“I love you too Will”

“Could you have your parents drop you off at my house tomorrow morning? I was thinking we could sit outside then go to school together. My mom’ll drive us.”

“I’d love that” she said happily. I smiled.

“That’s great. I gotta go. Love you.”

“Love you too”

I logged off my laptop, turned it off then went to sleep, eager for tomorrow to come faster.
________

That morning, I woke up earlier than normal so that I could go outside to wait for Sarah.

I dressed warm because it is still snowing. I put on my dark brown coat with the white fur in the hood, my dark jeans and my black baseball cap.

When she came, she was dressed in a tan jacket, a colorful scarf and light jeans. She had her hair up in a bun.

I smiled when I saw her but she looked upset about something.

“You okay Sarah?”I asked her.

She shook her head as her mom drove away. She ran to me and threw her arms around my neck. She had tears in her eyes as she said, “My parents were fighting last night. I yelled at them to stop but they wouldn’t. They pushed me out of the way and I fell onto the coffee table. There was a glass cup on it and it cut my waist.”

She was crying now. Actually, it was more like sobbing. I rubbed her back but I didn’t feel like I could help her. Then I thought of something.

“You can stay at my house if you want to.”

She nodded. “I’ll run away. I’ll come home from school and act like I’m okay, but, then I’ll pack a bunch of stuff and I’ll sneak out and come to your house.”

I slowly took both her hands. “This’ll be great for both of us.” There was a slight smile on her face. “I love you Sarah.”

“I love you too Will”

I slowly leaned down and kissed her forehead. Her hands were really cold. I rubbed my thumb over them to warm them. Tears were still falling down her cheeks. I took one hand away from hers to wipe her tears away. I stroked her cheek after all the tears were gone.

I placed my palm on her cheek as she rose to her tippy toes. Our lips met and sparks flew. I could feel my body get warmer and I’m sure she was feeling the same way.

I could tell that neither of us wanted to pull away but we were interrupted by my mom clearing her throat. I didn’t even know she was out here.

“Time for school,” she said calmly, “I heard you guys talking about Sarah staying here. I’m fine with it as long as it is so that her life is better. Not because you guys want to be together more.”

We both nodded agreeing. I kept one hand on hers as we picked up our backpacks, slung them over one shoulder and got into the car.

We arrived at school happier than we have for a long time.

We went to the library as usual. But, I sat down and Sarah sat on my lap. When Katie and Christy came in, they had the most shocked faces when I was smiling. Angelina wasn’t so happy. She has had a crush on me for a while and I think she was hoping I’d ask her out soon. She just sat down, unhappy.

But, I’m in love. I’m happy for the first time in a long time. I won’t let anyone mess this up.

The five-minute bell rang and Sarah grabbed my hand and pulled me after her as she flitted out of the library. I wrapped my arm around her shoulders. People looked so surprised that I have a girlfriend. It was kind of like immunity.

I smiled very proudly as we passed the jocks and the populars.

I was ecstatic when we got to science without me getting pushed, tripped, punched, kicked or injured.

This is great.
________

About 2 months later, me and my parents and one guest were invited to my “Aunt” Elise’s marriage. She isn’t really my aunt. She’s just really good friends with my mom.

Of course, I’m taking Sarah. That would just be mean if we went and left her home by herself.

I’m renting a tuxedo for the wedding but Sarah had her heart set on buying a pretty dress for it. She got a purple dress that has a thick, black belt around the waist. It is strapless and goes to right above her knees. She looks beautiful in it.

When the day finally came, we were invited to ride in the limo. That was really cool. The roof of the limo glowed different colors and me and Sarah got to sit in the two-people seat at the short end of the limo by ourselves. That was cool too.

When we arrived at the church, Sarah and I sat at the end of the 2nd pew. We sat with my dad because my mom is the maid of honor. It’s nicely decorated but it is a traditional wedding scene. Until you see my Aunt Elise’s wedding dress. It’s multi-colored and it looks frayed at the bottom. That’s typical for her. My mom’s dress is just plain black and has spaghetti straps on it.

The ceremony was nice. But, the best part was the reception. It was like a huge party and I loved it. I could be numb even though it didn’t matter to me. I chose to not be numb. And it felt great.

Sarah and I were on the dance floor the whole time. We danced to Lady Gaga, B.O.B, Paramore, Taylor Swift, Bruno Mars, Adam Lambert and Katy Perry.

Then, a Glee song came on. Marry You by Bruno Mars. I looked at the D.J. who was smiling at me. When I looked away from him, Sarah’s arms were draped around my neck. I slowly placed my hands on her waist and suddenly, we were the only ones on the dance floor.

Hey baby, I think I wanna marry you

Then, it seemed like we were the only people in the world as we danced gracefully around the dance floor. Even when the song was over, we continued to dance to no music and everyone was still watching. Then, I bent down and kissed her softly on the lips and everyone cheered. That brought us back to reality.

All of the sudden, we weren’t alone, we were in a room with 200 other people and I felt my cheeks get red. Sarah smiled at me and brought me out to the hallway of the reception hall. It’s cooler out here. It was really warm in the reception room.

We both took a seat on the small wooden bench. I took Sarah’s hand and she looked up at me and kissed me. When I started to kiss back, her body turned towards mine and her hands were on my chest. I placed my hands on her lower back as we kissed. We’ve never been the kind of couple that just make out but, we’re making out now. We also haven’t been the kind of couple that “tongue wrestle” but, we are now.

I’ll admit, I started it but she didn’t stop me so I assumed she wanted to too. It felt natural with her. I’ve had one girl friend before but when we kissed like this, it was gross.

Is this what it feels like? To really be in love? I assume it is. But, I can’t be sure because I thought me and my other girl friend were in love but then she cheated on me. On my birthday. The worst birthday I’ve ever had. I cried for at least 5 hours.

But, that’s all behind me. I’m with Sarah now. We’re happy together. We’re in love.

The kissing was more intense now. My hands were moving across her back as she ran her fingers through my hair.

Creak. The door of the reception area opened and my cousin’s girlfriend, Danielle, came out.

“Sarah? William? Sorry to interrupt but they’re cutting the cake and they want you two there.” She said slightly embarrassed.

“O… okay. We’re coming.” Sarah said. She got up and fixed my hair that she had messed up a bit. I smiled and she smiled back at me. We walked into the room and towards the cake stand. When we got there, we were taken to the front of the crowd to watch. We held hands the whole time.

After the reception was over, my mom and dad went to a bar with my Aunt Elise and her husband. So, we were forced to go to my Cousin Jacob’s house. Sarah and I sat on the couch and watched T.V. most of the time. We were kissing for the other part. Only when Jacob’s parents weren’t watching. I can’t help it. I wish we could kiss all day. It’s just so natural and it makes me forget everything but her.
________

It seemed like a week and winter was over. Spring flew by and summer was here. Sarah and I planned a trip to the beach the week after school ended. Now, it’s the last day of school and it has been my favorite day of school for the whole year.

It’s a half day so I only have to deal with the first three periods of the day. I only have Science, Math, and Chorus. Science was okay because we watched a movie (unfortunately, it was about science and it was educational) and we got to move seats so Sarah and I sat in the back by ourselves.

In Math, we watched a movie too. The teacher brought in “Twilight” by Stephanie Meyer for us to watch but I fell asleep because the lights were off and I was really tired.

In Chorus, we just talked and hung out. Me, Sarah, Katie and a girl named Melissa hung out in the back and Melissa kept saying that Sarah and I are gross because we kiss in front of her. So of course we’re going to keep doing it.

Then, the bell rang and Sarah and I were the first ones out the door. We’re going to head to Miami, Florida tonight. We’re going to stay at a beach house for 3 weeks with my mom and dad.

I’m already packed and so is Sarah. We were both the first ones on our school bus. We sat all the way in the back for once. All we wanted to do is get home and get on the plane.

When we finally did get to the air port, we practically ran to the plane. We had our carry-on bags with us. Mine had 2 sweat shirts, band-aids, my I-pod, my cell phone, a hat, and an extra pair of jeans just in case.

Sarah’s has make up, a jacket, her I-pod and her cell phone. We sat next to each other so that we could talk and things like that. I lounged back in my seat and lowered the front of my hat so it covered my eyes.

I was asleep for most of the ride, listening to my I-pod with Sarah’s head on my shoulder because she was asleep also.

My parents woke us up when the plane landed. I can see the beach from here. I can’t wait. My parents rented a car for us to use for the time we’re here. We drove to the house and me and Sarah went straight to our room and put our bags down.

It was about 7 P.M. so we decided to go to the beach because most likely no one will be there. I decided to wear only swim trunks. Sarah wore a bikini.

When we got to the beach, the few people that were there stared. I guess they noticed my cuts. I don’t mind. I’m on the beach with the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. That’s all I care about.

I sat in the sand and Sarah sat next to me.

“How fast can you run?” She whispered in my ear playfully.

“I don’t know… Why?” I responded questioningly.

“Catch me” She whispered as she stood up and ran. Reflexively, I got up and ran after her. I laughed the whole way.

We were running across the water line. Water was splashing up our legs and our feet left marks in the sand.

I ran as fast as I could and I caught up to her. I wrapped my arms around her waist. She turned towards me, smiling, and pushed me but, I pulled her down with me.

She landed on top of me and I kissed her. She kissed back playfully. We were making out like on the bench but this is better. I felt her fingers in my hair. My hands were on her waist.

She took a breath and I took one too. I felt her bite my lip and I smiled.

“A bit frisky there?” I asked.

“A little” She said, smiling.

“I love you” She smiled bigger then.

“I love you too, Will” Then, I smiled bigger.

My life can’t get any better.

Unfortunately, I was right. The chances of my ex-girlfriend being at the beach at the same time as me? I thought it was 1,000,000 to 1. But, who walks up and says, “Will? Will Allspach?”? My ex-girlfriend.

Sarah and I looked up at her. She was in a tight bikini. We got up quickly and then something unexpected happened. She hugged me and said “I’ve missed you!”

“Who is this?” Sarah said, crossing her arms and looking annoyed.

“This is Taylor. She’s my ex-girlfriend.” I said uncomfortably.

“What are these?” Taylor asked, horrified. She was looking at my cuts.

“I… I cut myself.”

“Why?”

“I hate my life. But, Sarah made it a lot better though. She dug me out of the grave I felt like I was in.” I saw Sarah smile out of the corner of my eye.

“I guess you’ve really changed since we dated.”

“I did. A lot. Sometimes I wish I could kill myself just to stop my pain.” Sarah took my hand and I weaved my fingers between hers.

“I guess I’ll leave you two alone.” She said as she walked away.

I hate seeing people I haven’t talked to in a long time. It reminds me of my past. Suddenly, I was depressed about my life.

“Sarah… Let’s… let’s just go back to the house.” She understood and we walked back to the house in silence.

When we got back home, Sarah changed into shorts and a tank top for bed. I went in the bathroom and I just sat in the shower and thought. I pulled my knees to my chest.

We had already unpacked all of our clothes and bathroom supplies.

I brought my blade. I didn’t want to cut but it was just in case. I had put it in the bathroom in “my drawer” so Sarah wouldn’t find it. I slowly got up and got it. I sat back in the shower and cut on my chest and my arms.

Knock! Knock! Knock! The sudden sound made me jump.

“Will? You almost done? You’ve been in there for a while.” Sarah said a bit concerned.

I quickly turned on the shower to wash away the blood. But, the sound of the water made Sarah quickly open the door. I didn’t think to lock it.

“Will!” she yelled as she ran over to the shower and turned off the water. Tears were streaming down my cheeks by now and I couldn’t contain the sobs that were coming from deep within me.

I hadn’t realized where I was holding my blade now. Right by my throat.

Sarah quickly pulled it from me.

Numb. Again I’m numb. She got into the shower with me and she had her arms around me. I don’t think she even cared that she was getting water and my blood on her. She just held me and kept telling me she loves me.

Eventually, I bandaged up my fresh cuts and laid in bed.

“I have myself in pretty deep, don’t I Sarah?” I whispered as she laid next to me.

“It’s okay. I’ll help you through this. You’re not alone.” She whispered soothingly while rubbing my back. She always knows the right things to say.

After vacation, my depression sky-rocketed. I was at the limit. Whenever I tried to go on Facebook, I had to leave because of the messages I would get. I wish only my friends on Facebook could message me but no. All of the jocks and popular people can get to me. This sucks.

My life went from awesome to suicidal in 3 weeks.

I decided that this was the end. I can’t take it anymore.

I stepped into the bathroom, shaking. I slowly made my way to the closet where we keep medicine. I know my dad has antibiotics and medical steroids in there because he has been sick.

Sarah has no idea what I’m about to do. No one has an idea of what I’m about to do. Only me.

I opened the closet and reached my hand towards the bottles of medication. I took out two different bottles of steroids and one bottle of antibiotics.

My hands were shaking as I poured out five pills from each bottle. I filled a glass of water and swallowed all fifteen one-by-one.

It was about ten P.M. I went back to my bedroom and laid in my bed. Sarah went to her room which used to be the office until she moved in.

I closed my eyes and drifted to sleep. Slowly, everything became black. And I felt myself drift away.
________
SARAH

I woke up feeling happy, excited that it was Saturday and I would spend the whole day with Will.

I was wearing purple sweatpants and a black camisole. I stood up from my short bed and flitted into his room.

I jumped on his bed playfully. He was bundled up in his covers as usual. But, usually he would wake up if I pounced on him like that. But, all he did was lay there.

“Wake up sleepy head.” I said while shaking him vigorously.

Nervousness overwhelmed me. I sat still and watched his chest. No movement.

I quickly got off the bed and ran down the stairs, tears running down my cheeks. I ran to his mom and told her that he’s not breathing. She ran upstairs and called 9-1-1.

In about 15 minutes, the ambulance arrived and took us with him to the hospital. They were attaching a bunch of I.V.s into his arm and they were putting tubes down his throat. I was sobbing. I thought I was about to throw up.

I clasped my hand in his. In hope that he would know I’m there. But, deep inside, I knew he wouldn’t know.

Once we got to the hospital, they sent him straight into surgery and me, his mom and his dad were forced to sit in the waiting room.

At one point, I laid on one of the couches and fell asleep because I wished that this was all a night mare and that if I go to sleep, I’ll wake up in real life.

When I woke up, the doctor was talking to his parents.

“He’s out of surgery and he’s awake now. He’ll be in the Psychiatric Ward for about 9 weeks for his severe depression and his cutting. You can go visit him now.” He said as he gestured the direction of the Psychiatric Ward.

I slowly got up and went the direction he was showing. When I found him, I ran to his bed side and took his hand.
________
WILLIAM

I knew it was Sarah as soon her hand touched mine. She filled me with the warmth of home. Safety.

I had gotten three stomach pumps and they had to do surgery for something. I was unconscious for all of it so I don’t know what it was for.

“Getting your stomach pumped sucks.” I whispered in a voice that was barely audible and it was hoarse.

“Will… did you do this on purpose? Did you try to kill yourself?” she said in a really worried voice.

Tears poured down my cheeks silently. She took it as a yes.

She slowly and carefully laid beside me. She lightly kissed my lips. There were tears on her cheeks and she was trying to hold them back. But I gave her a look that said “just cry” as I started to cry. And then she started to cry hard. We just laid there holding each other, crying.

I was better within 6 weeks but, I was in the Psychiatric Ward for another 9 weeks. They did get me to stop wanting to cut. I made some friends while I was there. There was a boy my age with cancer that I hung out with during lunch and dinner. There was a boy that was seventeen and he was in for cutting too. He and I stayed friends because we both needed one. There was another boy that was sixteen who was in for alcohol and drug abuse but, I only knew him for 2 weeks before he died from an overdose.

Derek (the boy who cuts) and I talk to each other at least once every few days. He should be coming for a visit soon. I couldn’t sign up for marching band this year because of my therapy. I’m still going to a counselor to talk about my problems and concerns and the sessions are working. I actually look forward to them.

My life is turning around. I’m going to use this year to re create myself. Start fresh.

I slowly walked into the school (which was re built that summer) and looked around. I took in a deep breath, and then went to the new library.

I found Sarah, Katie, Christy and Angelina and sat with them. Angelina stared at me almost the whole time. Kinda creepy if you ask me.

“Hey Will… could you walk with me to my math class to get my book? I forgot it.” She asked as we walked out of the library.

“Uhh… sure,” I turned to Sarah, “I’ll see you next period okay?” She nodded.

This year, I have Algebra 2, photography, biology, English, history and gym. Of those, I have photography, biology, history and gym with Sarah.

Angelina and I went to her math class. After she got her text book, we walked out but, suddenly, she was in front of me and she kissed my lips. I quickly pulled away.

“What the heck?!” I yelled.

“I just thought… maybe you like me… like I like you.” She whispered, embarrassed.

“I’m dating Sarah. Why would you think it’s okay to kiss me?!”

“Because I really like you.”

“Yeah well no one likes you!”

I knew I said something wrong when she stared at me with wide eyes. Tears slowly fell down her cheeks.

“Ange… I didn’t mean it…” I said apologetically as she turned and ran away.

I followed her and caught her right before she went into the girl’s bathroom. I turned her to face me as I hugged her.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. If I wasn’t dating Sarah, I would’ve totally kissed back.” She looked up at me and this time, more careful, she kissed me. I didn’t want to but I let her. I even kissed back a little. But, now I feel guilty. I’m already late for 1st period, so I pulled away and just walked to the security desk to get a note. Then, I went into my class and sat down.

What have I done?
_______
SARAH

First period went okay. But, I was really excited to be with Will next period. So, once the bell rang, I practically ran out of the room and down the steps to the photo lab. When I walked in, I realized I was the first one there.

I sat at an empty table and put my stuff in the spot next to me to save it for Will.

He was the last one in. I assumed he was in a far away classroom. But, he had a guilty look on his face. I moved my stuff and he sat down without a word.

“You okay?”

He shrugged.

“What’s wrong Will?”

“Well… Ange… she kinda ummmm… kissed me.”

I looked at him, shocked.

“I’m gonna kill her after school.” I said with anger in my eyes.

He just stayed silent and the teacher started to talk.
_______

After school, I found her. She was looking the other way when I pushed her.

She whirled around to see who had shoved her. When she did this, I punched her as hard as I could in the face.

She was on the ground and I kicked her. It wasn’t until then that Will came and pulled me away. I was yelling at her. Calling her words that I know my mother would ground me for.

But I didn’t care. I never want to talk to her again. She tried to steal my boyfriend. My only love. I was not going to let her take him from me.

I took Will’s hand and walked to the bus. I’ll be getting called to the discipline office tomorrow but I don’t care. She got what she deserved.
_______
WILLIAM

I don’t think I should tell her that I kinda kissed Angelina back. But, I feel guilty not telling her. Ughhh. Why do girls have to be so complicated?

I should tell her. No, I shouldn’t. Yes, I should. I’m going to.

The bus crept to a stop as me and Sarah went to the front. And then we got off and walked to my house from the bus stop.

“S… sarah?” I asked nervously, not believing I’m actually going to do this.

“Yeah Will?” she asked as we went up the steps to our rooms.

“What if I kissed Angelina back?” At this, she stopped walking and looked at me.

“You did what?!” She asked in shock.

I looked away and she pushed me to the side and walked down the steps and I went after her.

“Sarah!” I yelled.

“Leave me alone!” SLAM! The door shut in my face.

I wish I was numb. I wish I could make the pain of the sound of the door go away. But I can’t. The heartache was too real. Too painful. I watched her run up the street and around the corner. I know where her favorite spot is. The park. When I get myself to move I’ll follow her. But, I know I screwed up. I know I hurt her. And that hurt me.

I predicted that about ten minutes went by until I got up the strength to walk out the door and up my street. Slowly, I made it to the park.

I looked over the play area and saw her on the swing. Her head was down and her hair hung over her face. I made my way to the swing next to her. When I sat down she asked, “Why are you here?”

“Because I love you” I said sincerely.

“Obviously you don’t.” She said, angry. Her words are like daggers. Plunging deeper into my chest with each syllable.

“Yes I do. I screwed up Sarah. I just need another chance. It’ll never happen again.”

“Why’d you kiss her?”

“I have no clue.”

“Because you like her more than me.” I took a hold of the chain of her swing and pulled her closer to me. I held her there and I kissed her with more love than I ever kissed her with before. And she knew that. She kissed back with the same amount of love.

“I love you.” I whispered.

“I… I love you too.” She whispered back just barely audible.

“Don’t forget that. Ever.” I whispered. She just smiled then kissed me softly. The heartache still lingered in my chest as we both stood up.

I took her hand and weaved my fingers between hers. The pain in my chest slowly dissipated and I felt better. I sighed happily and then we walked back home, smiling the whole way.

SARAH

This weekend, I’m staying over my Aunt’s house and she’s going to drop me off at school on Monday morning. I also just have to get away for a while. I’ve been having a crush on this guy at school. Alex. He’s a smart kid but he’s cute and he’s nice to me. I feel bad though. What if I hurt Will? He cheated on me and it hurt. Would I be just as bad to like someone else a lot?

I’m just going to forget about it for now. I’m with my Aunt, Uncle and two of my cousins. We’re just going to have a good time and I’ll forget about it all.

We went to fireworks that were going on at the neighbor’s house. And then we went to dinner at a nice restaurant. But, guess who’s there. Alex.

I sat at the table and from the corner of my eye, I saw him walk my way. I kept my head down until he reached me.

“Hey Sarah.” I heard him say right next to me.

“Hey.” I said, looking up at him.

“I’m just here with my sister and her boyfriend. You can join us if you want.”

“Ummm…” I looked at my Aunt for approval. When she nodded, I said, “sure.” I got up and walked to his table. He let me slide in first then he sat next to me.

“Alex got a cutie.” His sister said. I just smiled. I hadn’t told him that I have a boyfriend. I don’t think I want to tell him.

He smiled and he put his arm around my shoulders and said, “Yeah.”

I kinda leaned into him. Not wanting him to take his arm away. And we both smiled.

But, it had to end sometime. About 30 minutes later, my Aunt called me over. But, I had to say something.

“Uh… Alex… I kinda have a boyfriend”

“I won’t tell” he said with a flirty smile.

I giggled a little and walked to my aunt and we went to her car.

I was smiling the whole way to their house. But, tomorrow I’ll have to face Will. This weekend went by really fast. Suddenly, it was time to go to school. I wore grey skinny jeans and an orange shirt with a purple jacket.
_______

I walked in school and saw Will sitting on the bench in the lobby of the school. He had his hood up and his head down so I couldn’t see him well.

When he looked up and took his hood off, my jaw dropped. Instead of the amazing shine of different shades of blonde, there was a dull black with red that looked as deep as blood.

I just stared.

“I know you like guys with black hair.” He murmured sternly as he got up and walked upstairs. I quickly went after him.

“What are you talking about?” he abruptly stopped and turned to look at me.

“Don’t play dumb Sarah. You know exactly what I’m talking about! I know you were with Alex! I know you like him and he likes you back! So just go be with him!” he yelled.

“Will. I love you. But I do like Alex.” He shook his head and walked away, speechless. And I just stood there, speechless, motionless.
________
WILLIAM

Love. Yeah, I thought it was love. But really, it was just a waste of time. Just heartache. Again.

I know that she’ll be at home when I come home but that doesn’t mean that I can’t ignore her.

After school that day, I walked into my room and closed my door. I heard her go into her room. Over the past year, we found out that there is a spot in the wall that divides our rooms where we can hear through. We usually talk through there at night or we just text.

“Will? There’s a note in my room that says your parents are going to be out for the night.” She said, shyly.

“Okay.” I said in a stern tone.

Then, I heard my door open and I saw her. She was wearing black shorts and a blue tank top. She slowly walked over to my bed. She sat next to me.

I looked at her.

“You shouldn’t have done that to your hair.” She said while ruffling my hair.

“I wanted to.” I barely finished when her lips were on mine, her tongue in my mouth.

“What are you doing?” I whispered, not sure of what to do.

“Saying sorry Will. For everything” she whispered as she untied my sweatpants.
I gave in and I was on my back and she was on top of me with her knees on either side of my waist.

Slowly, one by one, each article of clothing began to come off and ended up where ever we threw them. I took out protection that we got when we had “the talk” at school. Both of us kinda got nervous but we didn’t stop. We were both sweating and we just couldn’t contain this feeling. And it was just like that. In 20 minutes, it was over. We didn’t know what to do so we just laid there. Motionless. It was great, don’t get me wrong, but I was shocked.

I felt I should do something. I leaned over to Sarah and kissed her. She looked… different. Not herself. But, even more beautiful. We had a greater bond. We’re in love. I couldn’t think of anything else. Just her.

I slowly rolled so that I was on top of her. It still felt awkward because we were still naked but we didn’t care. I kissed her. Slowly, I kissed to her neck. I bit down just hard enough to make her gasp a little. But, to my surprise, she bit my neck too. I smiled then I was kissing her neck. Picking my next spot. I bit hard. I knew we were getting hickies, but neither of us care. We bit each other’s arms and necks and it felt good even though it kinda hurt. I didn’t mind.

We just made out for the next 20 minutes and it was great.

I just held her. My lips found hers and after about 30 minutes, Sarah fell asleep.
I slowly got up and slipped my sweatpants on. I laid the blanket over her and then, I went into the bathroom.
I looked in the mirror. My black hair was hanging in my face with only a couple of the red streaks along with them. My skin seemed a bit paler and I felt different. It didn’t seem real. I felt so weird. About a year ago, I didn’t even think I’d find love. And now, I’m not a virgin anymore.
“Whoa,” I whispered in shock.
I put my hand on my cheek and looked at myself.
There were red welts all over my neck and some of them were already turning the deep purple of a bruise. There were others on my arms.
These same welts were on Sarah’s body. I just imagined her brown and green eyes locked on my light blue eyes. I imagined our bodies pressed together and then I thought about what we did, the feeling, the love.
I slowly went into my bedroom and sat at the edge of my bed. I watched her breathe slowly and shallowly. I made my way to the spot next to her and kissed her fore head lightly.