CHAPTER II

*BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* Ugh! How is it already morning? As I force myself out of bed I can hear Gabby running into the room. I’m sure she’s ready for today.

“GOOD MORNING! Are you excited?” she says with lots of excitement.

“Of course. But the real question is are YOU excited?”

As she squeals in excitement I give her a big smile and give her a piggyback ride to my parents’ room. As I’m about to walk into the bathroom I realize that I forgot to get my phone and Airpods. I always need my music to get ready every morning for some reason. It just automatically makes my day better when I start it off listening to my favorite music artists - C.A.S, Stephen Sanchez, and The Strokes. After I wash my face, get dressed, and eat breakfast, I have to tackle my not so favorite part of every morning. Doing my hair. 

I’ve never really been a huge fan of my hair. I see it as a curly and frizzy ball of messiness. When I was younger all I wanted was to have long luscious hair but instead I had 2 inch long curls. I didn’t really think too much about it until I started to see more girls with long straight hair at school. My family and friends have helped me unknowingly with this though. I get compliments on my hair every once in a while. Usually the “I love your hair it’s so curly and pretty!” but don’t get me wrong I appreciate it a lot and it gives some confidence. My parents are the nicest about it, they talk fondly of my insecurities which honestly really helps me.

Well anyways now that I’m done lathering my hair with the only gel in the world that can kind of control my curls. I’m almost ready to walk out the door, but if I’m being honest I’m procrastinating it because I don’t really want to go. I always like to get to school early for the first day so I have to leave now. 

My mom was the one to drive me today since Gabby wanted Dad to take her. I was looking out my window in the passenger seat watching as cars moved with ours and the trees quickly leave where my eyesight can reach. When mom breaks the silence. 

“You seem a little less nervous this year. You know I think I might be more excited than you are Izzy haha.”

“Yeah I noticed that too,” I laughed, “I think I’m used to the whole high school thing. My freshman year I was a nervous reck.”

“I know but look at you now. I knew you would be okay.”

I smiled at her. Mom has always been really good at giving me pep talks even when I don’t realize that I’m in need for one. I truly don’t know what I would do without her - and her brownies of course haha. She’s one of the most important people in my life and always will be. 

Before my very own eyes, we’ve already made it to my school. While my mom is looking for a parking spot I’m looking around and observing the campus. I think about how the students will be. The scared Freshmen trying to find people from their middle school, Sophomores in their little groups looking excited, Juniors that are neither excited nor frantic just excited to be over half way through high school, and the Seniors. 

I’ve noticed that there are different types of Seniors: the ones that are reminiscing on their high school years not wanting to leave just yet and the ones that are tired of it, ready to go home already. I think I’ll be somewhere in the middle.

CHAPTER III

“Alright, I would love to stay with you a little longer,” my mom says with a frown, “but think it’s time for you to go now.” 

I sighed.

“ I know, I know.”

I started to gather my things like my phone and backpack. I say bye to my mom and start to look for a couple of my friends from last year.

***

The day had been going really well for a first day of school. I enjoyed my teachers and didn’t hate the people I sit by. Then fifth period rolled around… My teacher got a phone call from the front office and he looked a little concerned while he listened to the person on the phone. Naturally I was curious on what was happening or who was involved. Surprisingly, my teacher then said,

“Isabella Green, you’re going home Sweety. Take all your belongings with you please.”

“Okay.”

I felt all eyes on me, which isn’t a good feeling since I don’t like much attention. As I walk out a hear a few whispers. I’m assuming that they saw the concern in the teacher’s face as well. I finally reach the office and I see my dad there. He didn’t say anything about picking me up early today so now I have a weird feeling. I turn to look at the front desk lady, 

“Hello, you’re Isabella Green correct?” she says

“Yup.” I look at my dad and I can immediately tell that something is wrong by the worried look on his face.

“Alright!” she looks at the both of us and her smile dies down a bit, “You may leave with your father now.”

“Thank you.” I give her a small smile then go to Dad.

***

The drive was pretty quiet. I didn’t know where we were going but my dad looked sad so I was scared. Then Dad started to turn into a hospital. I’m confused. 

“Mom was in a car accident Sweety.” my dad said in a soft voice.

“Wait what?”

We’re walking into the hospital and I still don’t understand. I’m sure Mom will be okay. I know she will. She’s strong enough to survive. She has to be. 

“Come on Izzy.” my dad says interrupting my thoughts. 

We walk into the room and it immediately feels eerie. I see my mom laying there in the hospital bed. She’s covered in bandages and there’s a million cords that are all connected to machines attached to her. All I can hear are my thoughts and the beeps coming from the machines. I’ve never seen a person look this weak and lifeless before. I’ve never even been in a hospital.

Dad and I walk up to her. I hold her cold hand. I feel tears fall down my face but I feel so numb. This can’t actually be happening. This has to be a bad, bad , horrible, nightmare.

***

It’s been a couple weeks since that happened. Turns out, it wasn’t a nightmare. I wasn’t just imagining things. After being in the hospital for 5 days, Mom passed away. I still haven’t fully processed it and I don’t know if I ever will to be quite honest. She’s gone. It feels like I’ve cried rivers worth of tears, wiped my sisters’ face with a billion tissues, hugged my dad the most I ever have. Yet, nothing has made me feel better. 

Actually I take that back. Thinking of my mom has helped somewhat with the process of grieving. It’s very bitter sweet. Depending on the day, I will either poor my eyes out or smile bigger than I ever have. I miss her so insanely much. 

She never got to meet my first boyfriend, help me get ready for prom, pack my stuff with me while I get ready for college, watch me get married, have her first grandchild. She will miss out on so many things that I was so excited to experience with her. 

*10 years later*

It’s been ten years since I lost my mom. That was by far the hardest time of my life. It was so hard to push myself to finish all the goals that Mom would’ve wanted me to achieve. Fortunately, I over came that tough time.

Also I meant the most perfect guy a few years ago and he is now my husband. He has all the characteristics that Mom wanted all my future boyfriends to have. I think him and Mom would've really gotten along with each other. Now I’m with my 3 kiddo in the kitchen. They remind me so much of Mom, they look just like her. I take them to visit her grave every couple months and they love it! Anyways, I got to go now. My kids have been begging me to make double chocolate chip brownies. 

The end.