The next morning crashed into Stephen like a snow plow. He crawled out of bed in his dark room to get the light. It was 5:30, so he had half an hour to get himself together and ready to go before his friends arrived. His room had converted to a nest of clothes, chip bags, ice cream pints, and a looming stink of weed and beer. A nest of depression, as his friends called it. None of his friends could understand why he felt the way he did. All they did was tolerate it. He was still obsessed with her.

Stephen was sitting on the porch of his apartment building by 6, his duffel bag supported between his legs and his ski bag rested against the pillar of the porch. After a few minutes, a black Mercedes Benz Sprinter van pulled up in front of the building. Morgan rolled down the window from shotgun and yelled “Let’s go! Come on.” After shoving his bags into the van and putting his ski bag into the cargo box on top of the van, he slithered into the back seat. Josh was sound asleep in the seat next to him with his laptop cradled in his arms. Morgan was up front scrolling through his phone. Harrison was glazed eyed in the driver’s seat.

“Harrison, where did you even get this van?” Stephen asked.

“Oh. I rented it.” Harrison said. 

“Didn’t your parents cut you off last week?”

“They didn’t cut me off.”

“I could have sworn they did! You said that after your fight they drained your joint account and left you on your own.” Morgan said.

“Whatever. We have the van, and we have all the jackasses that are meant to be in it. Shall we?” 

“Yeah, why don’t we,” Morgan smiled. Stephen could hear his smile through his voice. Harrison started to drive. Stephen was still quite worried where Harrison got the van from, because they all knew that Harrison’s father stopped giving him money after he decided not to transfer to University of Chicago Law School.. So where did he get the money for the van? Stephen thought. 

“So Morgan, how’s the music coming?” Stephen asked.

“You want me to turn some on?” Morgan said.

“No, I mean how is your music coming along?” Morgan had started making his own music a few years ago when he was at Brown.

“I mean, I am hoping that Yellowstone will help get me some inspiration.”

“Do you have writer’s block or something?” Harrison asked.

“I just haven’t been able to write anything for a while. I haven’t had anything in my life to write about lately.”

“So you have writer’s block,” Stephen said. 

“You could say that, I guess. I just need a change of atmosphere, a new vibe, you know?” 

“I think Steph needs some too, haha,” said Harrison.

“What about you, Harrison?” Stephen asked. He was a little unsettled by the reminder.

“What do you mean?”

“Why are you coming? Do you need a change of atmosphere?”

“I mean not necessarily,” Harrison explained, “I just want to have some fun with the boys. Make some memories. Get some skiing in.” 

“Yeah me too,” Josh added with a yawn.

“Shut up, Josh. You didn’t even want to go,” Harrison said.

“I want to go.”

“Just go back to sleep so you will have enough energy for your  school work.”

“Hey, I actually want to go, just not for too long.” 

“That’s not what you told me last week,” Stephen said.

“I changed my mind. I think it will be a good time, like what Harrison said.”

“Okay buddy, so no complaining then?” Morgan chimed in.

“No complaining, haha.”

“Good vibes only on this trip.” 

* * *

Stephen woke up to bright daylight shining in his bloodshot, dry eyes. The light was invasive to him; he felt molested by just the presence of the sun. He knew it shouldn’t have bothered him, yet it did. Everyone was also awake and unnaturally lively, which also bothered Stephen. It was unbelievable how anyone could be so wide awake at eight o’ clock in the morning. The Lumineers were playing presumingly from Morgan’s aux cord, which set the mood for the drive. Morgan would say that, at least.

“Morgan, how could you listen to that melancholy so early in the morning?” Stephen blurted.

“I need an influence for the new material. The Lumineers is a good match for the geography. It’s like the soundtrack to a sad Western.” 

“So you’re telling us that you want your new, profound music to be the soundtrack to a sad Western?” Harrison asked. 

“No, but that kind of influence could be productive.”

“Where are we?” Josh said from behind his laptop screen.

“Cheyenne,” Harrison said. “Maybe if you would look up from that computer then you would know that. Jesus Christ, man.”

“Sorry for asking a simple question.”

“You said it yourself, it is a simple question that could be answered simply. That’s something that laptop of yours could answer.” 

“Maybe we should trade you in for a computer then. At least the computer is useful.”

“Do you want to drive? Do you? I will pull over,” Harrison started to heat up.

“Would you guys do the rest of us a favor and please shut the fuck up,” Morgan said. Stephen opened up his backpack to get a joint.

“Anything for you, Morgan. I wouldn’t want to set a bad influence for your music, now would I?” Stephen cracked a window and lit up.

“Stephen, do you have to smoke your weed now? It’s eight in the morning dude,” Josh said, his laptop still wide open. 

Stephen didn’t reply for a moment. “Could we pull over and get some breakfast?”

“Denny’s sound good?” Morgan asked.

Stephen smiled and said “Yeah man.” He was already glazed. Just then the daylight didn’t bother him much anymore.

“You are going to get us pulled over,” Josh said.

“Whatever. Denny’s Harrison?”

“Of course,” he beamed.

Next thing Stephen knew, they were sitting in a booth at a Perkins. Perkins are scattered around every interstate in the country. Slightly better quality than Denny’s. Harrison decided that Perkin’s was what he wanted instead. No one bothered to argue; it would have been a waste of effort. Stephen didn’t even think of arguing; he was feeling settled finally. He looked across to Josh, who was probably sitting behind the laptop. Morgan and Harrison were on their phones. Harrison was probably looking on Snapchat going through his hundreds of snaps, while Morgan was probably making a road trip playlist. Stephen was probably going to blow his brains out if his food wasn’t served in the next two minutes. “God I am so hungry,” Stephen said.

“Well I’m not very surprised. You’ve been high for the past three weeks,” Josh said, poking his head out to the side so Stephen could see his face.

“So?”

No one responded. Once the food came, Josh put his computer away, Harrison and Morgan put their phones away, and Stephen opened his eyes. They then ate in silence. After their meal, they hit the road. They left Cheyenne taking nothing from it but a full stomach. 

The drive mostly resembled the breakfast they had; it was silent. Morgan was playing calm, rhythmic music, which let Stephen’s mind wander as he looked out the window. Thoughts of Laura hijacked his mind, but one specific memory came to him. He thought about their first date. Late last April, after talking to her in his constitutional law class for a month or so, he wanted to ask her to do something interesting, something she would remember. No coffee shop, no dinner and a movie, nothing boring. He asked her to go hiking with him to the Royal Arch, a popular trail outside Boulder. She didn’t hesitate to say yes, and the next day they were hiking together. Stephen picked hiking to make it interesting, but his subconscious had an influence on the decision. He wanted to show off. He put on his expensive hiking clothes, bought a new pair of hiking boots, and packed everything he could possibly need in his little Patagonia backpack. Laura just put on simple athletic clothes and carried a little water bottle. She spent most of the hike making fun of him and how excessive he was, but it made him feel more relaxed. They talked more than they have ever talked before, which was a lot considering they were both law students.

By the time they reached the top, they were already holding hands. Stephen was convinced that his choice for the date was the right one. They had hours to talk, the view set a good background, and he felt at ease with the fresh air. On the way down, it wasn’t perfect anymore. They ended up getting lost, and they added on another two miles to the hike. Laura was exhausted and became quiet. Stephen was smart and kissed her at the bottom, a sort of thank you and apology at the same time. She was  still interested, so she asked him to go get coffee the next day.

The memory made Stephen cry. He turned towards the window so no one else could see, and felt his hot tears slowly trickle down his face. He felt something for the first time in a few days, and just feeling something overwhelmed him. He looked out at the yellow light over the brown fields. The mountains in the distance comforted him a little with their beauty.

“Stephen. Are you crying?” Josh asked.

Stephen wiped his eyes and turned from the window and said “I don’t know.”

“What do you mean you don’t know? Are you or are you not?” Harrison said.

“Don’t worry about it.”

“F Laura. She messed you up so bad.”

“Shut up, Harrison,” Morgan said.

“Why do I have to shut up? I’m just saying what we are all thinking.”

“No, you’re saying what you are thinking,” Josh said.

“And what are you thinking, huh?”

“I am thinking you should be quiet and leave Stephen alone.”

“Whatever. I’m gonna stop for gas soon. We are almost halfway to Jackson Hole.” 

After a few more minutes, Harrison pulled off the highway into a large gas station. Harrison was filling the tank, Morgan went inside to pee and get some snacks, and Josh sat in his seat texting his girlfriend while Stephen stared off into space. Stephen remembered he was sober again, so he pulled out another joint from his backpack and lit up. 

“Ugh, do you have to smoke in here?” Josh asked, turning off his phone.

“Do you have to talk right now?”

“Your weed smells so bad. I wish you wouldn’t smoke it so much.” Josh sighed and turned to his window. “Dude, a police car just pulled in. Put your joint out!”

Stephen didn’t hear what he said. “What?”

“A police officer just pulled into the gas station. Put your weed out now!” The police officer drove the car up to the other side of the gas pump on Josh’s side of the van. He didn’t get out of the car yet. 

Stephen licked his fingers and pinched the lit end of the joint. “Ow!” He burned himself, but the joint was put out. The cop got out of his car, and looked around through his cliche aviators probably bought at a gas station just like the one they were at. Stephen shakily shoved the joint to the bottom of his backpack, and slid the backpack under his seat. The cop was visibly sniffing while he was setting up his pump. He tilted his head behind the gas pump, looking over to the van through his reflective aviators. Josh was sweating in his seat, looking down at his phone. “What the f, Stephen. I told you.” They sat in silence until Harrison got back into the van.

“Stephen, what is wrong with you. Why the f are you smoking bud while there is a cop right next to us? Do you want to get arrested before we even get to Jackson Hole?” Harrison exclaimed.

“Just be quiet. He hasn’t said anything yet,” Josh said. Stephen nodded in agreement.

“He gave me the look, Josh!” Harrison hissed. Harrison looked out the window towards the cop, who was filling his tank. “He’s gonna come over once he’s done. I bet he’s contemplating talking to us right now.We need to go. If we get pulled over-” 

The front door opened and Morgan got into his seat. “Why the hell does it smell like weed in here while there’s a cop right next to us?”

“Let’s go.” Harrison started the van and slowly drove out of the gas station. He looked into the rear view mirror. The cop just watched them leave, shaking his head. His hands were shaking on the wheel.

“Okay. What the f

,” Morgan said.

“What?” Stephen said. He was looking out the window at the rolling hills. It was overcast.

“Steph. Why did we almost get arrested? Why can’t you even go two hours without smoking?”

Stephen was still looking out the window. He was conflicted with why he couldn’t reply. Was he afraid to say something? Was it worth saying anything? He sat there in silence as if he didn’t hear him. The rest of them also sat in silence. Stephen opened his bag and pulled out the half smoked joint from before to finish it off. He cracked the window, and got his lighter out. Josh was glaring at him, but he said nothing. Stephen looked out the window again, watching the smoke float out of his mouth and out of the window. Once Harrison could smell it, Stephen heard him muttering choppily to himself. The muttering did not bother him. Josh’s glaring did not bother him. When Stephen was finished with his smoke, nothing bothered him.

Stephen was unsure why he agreed to go in the first place at this point. He intended to go so he could stop thinking about her, but he couldn’t think about anything, anyway. All he wanted to do is look out that window and think about how brown the grass was, or how grey the sky was. He wanted to think about the small brick colored cliffs scattered on the horizon like inverted craters. He liked to picture himself as a pioneer, sitting in the hooded wagon looking out on the new frontier. He thought about the past quite often.

“You know how we always go skiing, right guys?” Morgan said.

“Yes,” said Harrison.

“We always do alpine skiing. Have any of you tried cross country skiing?”

“What even is that?” Josh asked.

“It’s just skiing but instead of using the gravity of the slope you are going down, you use your body to move across the snow.”

“Have you done that before?” 

“No, but I just learned about it from Jake in class. His family goes to West Yellowstone every winter to go cross country skiing there. It made me curious if any of you have done it.”

“I used to go all the time back in Vermont,” Stephen said quietly.

“You did?” You could hear the surprise in Morgan’s voice.

“Yes.”

“Do you like it?”

Stephen let a pause pass. He turned his face from the window  towards Morgan. “Yeah I liked it. I don’t think you guys would though. It’s very different from alpine.”

“Why wouldn’t we like it?” Harrison inquired. Harrison never liked to be told about himself. Even if it was a guess.

“Cross country skiing demands hard work. Instead of having gravity to pull you along, you have to push yourself. You have to will yourself, not go with the flow. It’s exhausting, demotivating, and boring at times. Sometimes you get a nice hill to slide down. But for every hill you get to slide down, there is another one you have to climb. And you guys aren’t the type to do anything like that.”

“Why don’t you cross country ski anymore?” Josh asked.

“I’m worn out from it.”

“Well maybe you can teach us once we get to West Yellowstone. We can rent skis for a day.” Morgan said.

“Maybe. I’m going to sleep now. Try not to wake me up.”

“You’re really going to sleep?”

“Yes.” Stephen put in his ear buds and closed his eyes. He thought about his winters in Vermont. His great uncle practically owned a mountain outside of Manchester. His family would always pick him up from school on the Fridays he got on winter break and they would drive from his hometown of Scarsdale, New York to Manchester. The years that they had snow, he was mesmerized by it. The thick white quilt of powder covered every inch of ground, stacked on every twig of the branches on the dark, barren trees. He would get to enjoy that for the last hour of daylight, but damn was that a good time to see that. The blood red from the sunset would get deeper and darker until it would fade into black. Some years they drove through blizzards to get there. Christmas was an important family gathering in his family, and due to his great uncle’s success as a well known corporate lawyer early into his retirement, his money mountain was a beacon.

Stephen loved the first day of every winter break. He woke up inside one of the rooms at the guest house of his great uncle’s estate, pull on his ski clothes, and run through the deep snow to the cellar under the white and red-bricked mansion to grab the skis. He would ski through the statue garden to get to the woods. Although the ski was a tough workout, he didn’t mind. He was distracted by the deep forest of thousands of grey and brown trees sticking out like pillars over the white snow and dead bushes. Being out in the woods away from the commotion, away from his family, left him with a sense of relief. The grey sky would sometimes emit rushes of snowflakes in the afternoon, veiling him in whiteness. He liked being in that purgatory. It wiped any emotion from his mind.

Stephen opened his eyes after a deep sleep. The weed really put him out. He looked out the window and could barely see through the blowing snow. They were getting dumped on. It was late afternoon, as it was dim but not dark. I looked ahead to the windshield and although I couldn’t see Harrison and Morgan’s faces from behind them, I knew that they were scared for their lives. I turned to see Josh’s face, and his reinforced that idea. “When did it start snowing?”

“How have you been asleep through all of this?” Harrison asked very loudly. I could hear the panic in his voice.

“I don’t know. What’s going on?”

“Well, first of all, a f'ing blizzard started, and then it started getting dark, and now the roads are getting worse and worse. We don’t know what to do.”

“Where are we?”

“A couple hours to Jackson Hole. We had to slow down to thirty an hour ago since the roads are pretty shitty.”

“Are we gonna make it?” Stephen was getting nervous. He was too sober for this.

“If it keeps getting worse, we might have to stop,” Josh said.

“We aren’t going to stop! This isn’t even that bad,” Morgan said, “I’ve seen much worse than this. Much worse. We can get through it, no problem.”

“Yeah, I’m not sure about that one, buddy,” Harrison said. Stephen realized that Harrison was scared. The last time that he could tell that Harrison was scared was when someone almost died of alcohol poisoning at one of his parties their sophomore year at Boulder. Otherwise, Harrison was really good at bundling up all of his emotions like the presents on Santa’s sleigh.

“We should keep going. What’s the worst that could happen?” Morgan said.

“We crash and die would definitely be the worst that could happen,” Josh said.

“Awe come on guys. Seriously. Do you want me to drive?”

“Fine,” Harrison pulled over to the side of the road, “You can drive.” They both got out of the car and switched seats. 

Morgan grinned as he started the van and hit the gas. Morgan was driving fifty miles per hour within two minutes. They knew that he couldn’t see, we knew that the road was slippery, but we also knew that there was nothing that we could have done to stop him. Stephen checked the Maps app on my phone, and they were thirty miles away from Jackson Hole. Thirty miles of winding mountain road on a layer of ice and snow. It seemed like Josh was shitting his pants, and Harrison was gripping the door handle. Morgan still had that stupid grin on his face. He was a child playing pretend in the backyard, scooting his little toy truck along the lawn. 

Meanwhile, Stephen couldn’t bear the stress that he was being forced into. He lit up a joint and huffed and puffed away. After it kicked in a bit, he did feel a bit better. Stephen saw a sign saying we had ten miles until we hit Jackson Hole. It was about thirty seconds after they passed that sign until we spun out. Josh was screaming his head off, Harrison was still holding onto the door handle, and Stephen saw Morgan’s grin was wiped off his face when he turned around to look at him. He saw the apology in his eyes. After the van stopped moving, Harrison just sighed. “You know what! I’m so sick of your shit, Morgan.”

“I’m sorry. But what’s the difference if we are stranded on the side of the road fifty miles from Jackson Hole or ten miles. If anything, this is better than if we didn’t keep driving.”

“You are so deluded! We are in a way worse situation! We are in the f'ing ditch!”

“Well, partly. It won’t be too hard to push it a couple feet back onto the road.”

“Okay then, asshole. You can go push.” No one else said anything. Josh was still in silent panic, and Stephen was out of it. The crash did not register in his mind. He felt like he was watching a movie, not playing a part in it. Morgan didn’t get out of the car. They all sat in the van, their slow burning rage leaving fog on the windows. After a few minutes, Stephen decided to pull his coat on and slide out of the van. He couldn’t bear the situation that he was in. He slowly walked out towards the woods. He stepped into the deep snow and waded through it, looking through the tall, dark trees at the soft white ground. He found a familiar peace with it. 

“Hey, Stephen. Are you seriously that high? Where the hell are you going?” he heard Harrison call from the open van window. Stephen didn’t answer. He continued to walk away from the disaster into the comfort of the wild.

Stephen soon found himself at a pond in those woods. Despite being frozen over, the ice had a blue glow radiating from it. The trees around the banks had branches that were curved over the pond, creating a crown of prickly twigs and branches over the pond. Stephen walked a few feet out on the pond and stood there, looking underneath his feet at the ice. The ice was so clear that he could see down to the bottom. He could see the little bubbles of air that never made it to the top. There was a fish that was frozen mid-swim. It looked like it was made of silver. He sat there for an hour trying his best not to think about anything. He just wanted to be in the moment, to immerse himself in it, not in his thoughts and memories. The silence became its own orchestra; a score for the moment. It was so soft, so slight, so ambient, but it was there. He felt a buzzing throughout his entire body. The buzzing turned into shivering. He was emotionless, numb, and blank. 

* * *

After Stephen was on the pond for over an hour, he saw Morgan appear between the dark pillars of trees. Morgan slowly approached the shore, his feet sinking into the snow and softly crunching it under his brown leather boots. He looked across the pond at Stephen for a few long seconds, and interrupted the silence. “Hey, buddy. We got the van out of the ditch. The snow just stopped too.”

Stephen looked at him with a melancholic face. He slowly exhaled before saying “Okay.”

“What are you doing out on the pond?” he asked carefully.

“I just wanted to have a moment of peace.”

“Do you think you’re ready to get going? I still want to make it to Jackson Hole tonight.”

Stephen nodded. He lifted himself onto his feet and trotted across the pond to Morgan. They started walking back in the direction that Morgan came from. 

“So, that was a nice looking pond, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah, I guess. Maybe you should write a song about it.” Stephen looked back at it.

“I haven’t actually been able to think of anything yet. The ideas aren’t coming.”

“Why not?”

“Well, you see, I can’t think of anything through all of this. I can’t focus.” Morgan started swinging his leg slowly.

“What do you mean?” 

“I mean that even though there is so much going on around me, I am missing all of the inspiration. I can’t find any substance yet,” Morgan said, “And you know what? I think you’re having a similar problem too.”

“Morgan, I’m not seeking substance or inspiration.” Stephen crossed his arms.

“Maybe that’s your problem. I want to find it and can’t, but you have the same opportunity to do so as I do, but you are avoiding it. You smoke all day until you pass out. When you wake up, you smoke some more. Don’t you think you’re missing substance too?”

“Whatever, man. I don’t know what to tell you.” Stephen paused. “Let’s just go back to the van.”

“You know what your problem is? You aren’t living. You’re living a life of silent struggle and desperation. There’s a tree falling in the woods of your own soul and there won’t be anyone around to hear the thud when it hits the ground. You’re on the run to nowhere but away from where you are now,” Morgan pleaded, his body buzzing with passion, “Listen, I know you are lonely and heartbroken, but you are surrounded by your friends on a vacation to experience something. How about you experience it? That’s what this is all about anyway. The experience. Once you can truly comprehend the experience, you will find some substance to it.” 

“Some experiences leave me with substance that is just pain. I’m not ready to experience anything more, yet.” Stephen was shivering as if a shadow crept up his back and breathed on his neck.

“If you’re not willing to move on and experience something new, then you’re a coward.” Morgan started walking back towards the van. Stephen trailed behind. They walked that way for the whole way back to the van. After their walk of silence between the dark trees tripping over dead bushes and fallen branches, they saw the white headlights of the van, which had all four wheels on the road again. They also saw red and blue flashing lights behind the van. They approached the van and opened one of the doors, and there wasn’t a single person in there. “Hey! Put your hands up. Now!” Stephen shot his arms to the sky as quickly as he possibly could. Morgan tossed his up slowly with disdain. A tall, slim police officer approached them both with his gun pointed in front of him. Another shorter one walked around them and pressed them against the van, one at a time, to search their pockets. He took their phones, Stephen’s lighter, and wallets. He proceeded to handcuff them and radio for another police car to come. Stephen was surprised that they were out during the blizzard, but as he thought about it, he guessed that they were out helping people out of the ditch.

When they arrived at the police station, they were brought to the same cell. The four friends sat across the room from each other, all looking at Harrison. Harrison was looking around the empty room, avoiding their eyes as much as possible, Finally, Morgan spoke up. “Why are we here?”

“I’m sorry guys. I’m really sorry. I feel bad,” Harrison began, “I didn’t exactly rent the van. I couldn’t afford to.”

“What did you do?” Josh asked.

“Well, I stole it,” he whispered.

“You stole the f'ing van!” Morgan yelled. 

“Can you shut your f'ing mouth before you incriminate us! You’re in law school, out of anyone, you should know not to say anything like that!” he hissed.

“Why did you do that?” Stephen asked calmly.

“I was sick of being useless. My parents left me broke and I wanted to contribute to the trip without going even further into debt. I took the van from the ski team at school.” He cracked his knuckles.

“Why. Why did you feel the need to do that?” Morgan yelled.

“I wanted to feel like I was still worth something.”

“That is so self centered. Unbelievable!”

Harrison didn’t reply.

“How did we get caught?” Stephen asked.

“The cops came in to help us out of the ditch. They ran the plates for kicks, I guess. They saw that it was reported stolen,” Josh explained.

They heard the lock on the door turning and a cop popped into the room. “You all each get one phone call. Make them count.” 

Once he closed the door again, Morgan turned to Stephen. “Steph, you should call her.”

“Why would she help us out of this?” Stephen’s eyes squinted at Morgan.

“I can call someone else to help us. You need to call her and tell her how you feel. You need closure. You can’t keep running from this. You’re running to nowhere.” 

Harrison and Josh both nodded. They smiled at Stephen. “You should,” Josh said.

Stephen sighed, looking to all of his friends. “Okay.” 

He stood up and knocked on the cell door. “Officer, I would like to make my call.” The police man opened the door and walked him over to the phone. 

He slowly pushed in the numbers, her numbers, and it started to ring. One ring. Two rings. Three. Four. “Hello. Who is this and why are you calling so late?” the voice from the phone asked. 

“H-hey. It’s me.” Stephen could feel his throat tighten.

“Stephen? Oh! Why are you calling me?” Stephen could hear that she was startled. 

“I need to tell you something. Could you just listen, Laura? That’s all I want.”

“Stephen, if this is an apology, don’t waste our time.” 

“It’s not. Do you think you could just listen to what I have to say?”

“Okay.”

Stephen took a deep breath. His heart was fluttering as the musty air of the police station slipped into his lungs. “Laura, I have some confessions to make to you. It has been over three weeks since you broke up with me, and I have been trying to avoid addressing it to myself, so I thought I would address it to you. After you left, my whole world fell apart. I quickly fell dependent on being high to get through my day. I needed it to forget about you, even if I didn’t want to. I decided to go on this road trip with Morgan, Josh, and Harrison to try to get over you. In reality, it was just an escape. I was running away from my feelings, away from my memories, and away from life itself. I’ve decided to stop running. I’m sick of my world crumbling apart. I’m sick of the flashbacks that I interrupt with a joint. I just needed to tell you this. If anyone would understand, maybe you would.” 

“I’m sorry, Stephen. I didn’t mean to do all of that to you. I just know that we can’t work and I’ve accepted that. I hope you will too.”

Stephen was starting to feel relieved. “I think I will be able to now. Is there anything else you want to say?” 

“To be honest, no. It’s too late and I’m tired. I just want you to know that you’re a good person and I wish the best.” 

“Okay. I hope the best for you too.” And he really did. He hung up and walked back into the cell, smiling faintly to his friends. Stephen freed himself. He was released from all of the bottled up thoughts, the haze, the numbness. He was ready to move forward. He was done running to stand still.