Love Hurts | Teen Ink

Love Hurts

January 27, 2019
By rachelmazur, Amherst, New Hampshire
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rachelmazur, Amherst, New Hampshire
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Author's note:

This story is about a girl in an abusive relationship. She has a hard time making friends and opening up to others because she doesn't want to upset her love. After reading this story I hope people realize what others can go through. People aren't all good and all bad, there is a mix in everyone and sometimes it is hard to realize what is best for us, and that courage can be found when everything seems lost.

The sound of the front door slamming shut is what jolts Eleanor awake. It’s not like she isn’t used to this, but it still startles her every time. Groaning as she starts to stretch her limbs, Eleanor slowly gets out of bed with a sore body. Knowing that a hot shower will help her start moving at a regular pace, she limps into the bathroom to turn on the water. The droplets hitting the floor sound like rain, which makes for a calming and peaceful way to start the day. Steam billows out when the glass door is opened, and the mirrors and windows become foggy in seconds. The morning sunlight cascading into the house casts a golden glow around the room. Eleanor gingerly washes her body, scrubbing away the dirt and grime from yesterday. Grazing over the blemishes on her skin as the memories of what caused this pain flow down her skin with the water, down onto the shower floor, and into the drain.

After a small breakfast of a fried egg and toast, Eleanor got dressed and headed to work. When she was in school, she would spend the nights doing homework at the local cafe near her house, now she works there. Eleanor wanted to be a writer. She went to school to learn all kinds of techniques to implement in her stories. Such as certain words that can convey feelings and experiences, how putting such fine details into the paragraphs makes them jump off the pages and into pictures. She learned everything she could have ever wished, but she wasn’t able to put any of it to use, all because Brendon thought being a writer was a stupid job. It wasn’t that her boyfriend didn’t support her, because she knew he loved her, but Brendon had very strong feelings about certain things, and Eleanor being a writer was one of them. But Brendon was right, he always was, and that is why Eleanor doesn’t share her journal with anyone. She loved her boyfriend so she did what he asked of her, and he loved her in return.

Entering the small cafe, The Cup of Tea, Eleanor walked behind the counter to clock in for work. There weren’t many people inside so she knew it wouldn’t be a very busy day.

“Hello dear, how are you doing today?” Barbara, the lovely woman who owned the shop asked.

“Morning B, I’m doing pretty good so far, how about you?” Eleanor replied and waited for Barbara’s answer before heading to the break room to drop off her things. When she returned, there was a Hibiscus Passion Fruit tea waiting with Barbara.

“How is Brendon?” She asked, “Are you okay?”

“I’m doing okay, he has been busy with work recently so I haven’t had much time with him,” murmured Eleanor. The one person she trusted the most in the world was Barbara. Barbara treated Eleanor like her own daughter and in turn, she knew everything about Eleanor. Everything including the reason for the bruises littering her skin, or the aches in her limbs. As Eleanor reached for her tea, her sleeve shifted and a yellowing bruise poked out from underneath.

“This is new,” Barbara whispered, “how busy has he been?”

“Oh that was from a few weeks ago, should be healed by now,” Eleanor winces as she runs her fingers over the sensitive skin. This was something that Eleanor never spoke about to anyone because it scared her. She was worried that people would think she did things that led Brendon to hurting her, and that she wasn’t a good girlfriend. She was worried that Brendon might find out that she told someone and hurt her more. Most of all she was scared.

“Darling you know you are always welcome here or at my house whenever you need anything, okay?” Barbara promised. Eleanor knew this. She also knew that Brendon loved her so much that she would never want to leave.

“Thank you Barbara, I know,” Eleanor whispered as the elder woman held her in a tight hug, “but I’m fine, he loves me, and I love him.”

“Oh sweetheart I hope you can achieve what your heart wants,” Barbara sighed. Wanting to change the subject, Eleanor asked about the history of The Cup of Tea.

“Barbara, how come I’m the only other staff member here?” she wondered.

“Oh darling, I have had many employees come and go, they were all too rowdy for my small shop,” Barbara answered, “the only good one I had was a young boy named Chris, but he’s grown up now with his fancy job that pays more than this.”

“I see… well, I’ve gotta finish this order,” concluded Eleanor.

When she got home it was 4:00. Eleanor knew that she had to start dinner right away, no matter how much she wanted to change into her comfy PJ’s. She got out all the ingredients and utensils to make tacos for her and Brendon. Using the seasoning that he likes, and preparing the toppings he always uses, Eleanor made dinner quickly and was able to change her clothes before the front door opened.

Brendon saunters into the dining room after discarding his shoes and work items.

“Hey baby, smells good,” He said while wrapping his arms around Eleanor’s waist.

“Thanks, it’s tacos. Just how you like it,” She replied, “I thought it would be fun since it’s Tuesday and we haven’t had them in a while.” She loved moments like these. The times where the two of them would just hold one another and smile. She wished they could have more.

“Yeah, sounds good babe. Hey, I gotta go put my stuff in the room and I’ll be right out,” Brendon told her while walking in the direction of their bedroom. Eleanor sat down at the table and prepared a plate for the two of them. “Eleanor, what is this?” Brendon yelled from the other room.

Fearing his anger, Eleanor timidly replied, “What is what?” She heard his footsteps travel across the floor towards her. Afraid of what was to come, Eleanor waited for Brendon to continue.

“Why are you writing? I thought I told you that being a writer was a stupid job!” Brendon bellowed.

“I-I’m sorry I only did it when I was stressed,” stammered Eleanor, “I wasn’t going to do anything with it I swear!” Knowing that it was only a matter of time before Brendon destroyed her journal or her body, Eleanor mentally prepared herself for the pain to ensue.

“I don’t understand! I treat you so well; I care for you, I give you what you want, and I love you, yet you still disobey me and I don’t know what more I should do!” Brendon exploded, “You go out, and you do things I tell you not to! I bet you don’t even work at that bakery do you? You probably made that up to distract me from the fact that you have been writing behind my back all this time. Some devoted girlfriend I have.” Swears and degrading words were thrown in Eleanor’s face, only an introduction of what was to follow. “You should know not to argue with me! I only gave you a few rules and you ignore every single one. It’s as if you don’t even listen to me! Are you even listening to me?”

The first blow was only a slap. It came after Eleanor tried to speak up and reason with Brendon. Telling him that she did, in fact, work at the coffee shop and bakery, then Brendon’s hand cut through the air. The palm of his right hand meeting her cheek in an angry crossing. The sound resonating throughout the room while her cheek stung from the impact. After that, he didn’t hold back. Punch after punch, kicks and slaps followed by more destructive words spit at her, all of them directed at the poor girl, limp on the floor. Tears never had the chance to form in her eyes, after three years, Eleanor only felt numb.

After he deemed it enough, Brendon left for the bathroom to wash his now bruised and bloodied hands. Seeing her chance, Eleanor grabbed her phone from her back pocket and debated with herself for a few minutes before she pressed the call button.

“H-hello?” She choked out after the fifth ring, “I need help, he-he did - it was so much wor-se - I don’t know if I can - Agh!” Eleanor was cut off by her own yelp. Brendon had heard her speaking and returned to the room she was in. After delivering a kick to her back, he took her phone, hung up the call, and then tossed it across the room.

“You idiot! I can’t believe you, you are the world’s worst girlfriend! You will never be loved by anyone else ever again, you are worthless. I am your only chance at love, why can’t you understand that? I only want what’s best for you because I love you,” sneered Brendon, “Whoever that was on the phone doesn’t love you, and they won’t help you because everyone knows that you are mine and you only love me.”

“I don’t love you, Brendon, an-and you don’t love me either. If you did, you would never hurt me. I-I’m, sorry,” Standing up to the person you thought you loved is something Eleanor never thought she would have to do, and it was heartbreaking. She was exhausted emotionally and physically, and she just wanted to leave. The problem was, Brendon wasn’t finished.

“You think I don’t love you?” Brendon’s voice softened. Maybe Eleanor was wrong, maybe he would change after this and be the same person she fell in love with. “That’s where you’re wrong. I do this because I love you! Everything I do is for you. That foolish little act of courage, however, will get you punished.” Brendon raised his arm, ready to strike Eleanor’s face.

As Eleanor started to slowly slip out of consciousness, the door swung open and there was yelling.

“Police, hands up!” There were so many voices that Eleanor moved to cover her ears. Everything was so sensitive and sore, the feet around her were starting to become blurry and it was getting harder to keep her eyes open. “Miss hold on! We are bringing you to the emergency room. We just need you to keep your eyes open for a few more seconds!” Someone urged her to stay awake while hands grabbed her and lifted her into the air. Eleanor felt her body being placed onto something soft and a mask placed over her nose and mouth, and then everything went dark.


~~~


When Eleanor woke up to bright lights, the first voice she heard was Barbara’s.

“Oh my gosh! I am so glad you’re okay dear,” she gasped, “I got so worried when your call ended last night! I’m so glad the police got there when they did. A neighbor called 911, if I had called it would have given Brendon more time to hurt you.” Barbara soothed Eleanor as she explained the situation. Brendon would be going to jail with charges of domestic violence, and Barbara invited Eleanor to live with her while she got back on her feet. The corner of the room coughed, and Eleanor became aware that there was someone else in the room with them.

“Mom, I think I’m gonna go stop by the cafeteria, do you ladies want anything?” The unnamed male voice in Eleanor’s room questioned.  

“Sure hun, I’ll just have whatever looks good,” Barbara answered, “what about you El?”

“Um, I’ll have a salad I guess. Uh, thank you?” Eleanor still didn’t know who the faceless man was, so she didn’t hesitate to ask the moment the door clicked shut. “Who was that?”

“Oh that was just my son Chris, you know, the only boy who I ever enjoyed as my employee,” Barbara giggled, “He’s such a sweetheart. He agreed to help you get back into the swing of things while you stay with us.” Eleanor hummed, and spent next couple of days recovering in the hospital with Barbara and Chris at her side.


~~~


After living with Chris and Barbara for 6 months, Eleanor felt loved by the family they had created. Barbara was the mother figure she needed. She would advise her against decisions that could be mistakes, and Chris was the best friend that would convince her to make those decisions and then laugh with her for hours on end.

Eleanor had learned a lot about others and herself in the past few months. The most important things however, were knowing that the past is in the past, and that the future can only get better. Family is what matters most in life, and Barbara, Chris, and Eleanor made the perfect one.



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