When we got to the man, my dad shook his hand. He also shook mine. He tried to shake my moms, but she is pretty much mute right now. She was too in shock to even blink. It was kind of scary actually. The man tried to talk to me, but I was in no mood to have a casual conversation. I was blocking his voice out, but all I heard was that his name is Dev.
We got in his trashy van and he drove us down empty streets for half an hour. We finally arrived at a tiny shack. There were no other houses around it. There isn’t even a street that leads to it. You have to go off the road and just drive on the dirt and hope to arrive at the shack. It was one story tall and hardly even had a platform to it. It was about 8 feet tall including the roof. It had barely any shape to it. It was two squares, one big one small, and a little hallway connecting them. The roof was also flat. The whole thing was so dull and disgusting. I could already feel the rats crawling over my feet. Dev said, “This is where you will be staying. It’s very quiet and there is no chance of anyone finding you. I suggest if you want to leave, the only place that you go is the market down the street, better safe than sorry.”
We all got out of the car and Dev drove away before we could even get in the house. We walked up to the front door and the wood floors creaked. The house was filled with cracked glass windows, ripped couches, chairs, and beds, damaged and scratched furniture, cobwebs, and dust. It looked completely like a cliche haunted house from a horror movie, so I was very nervous to stay there. There was one bedroom so I’m assuming that I will have to sleep in the living room on the couch. It’s the smallest house I’ve ever seen and the most dangerous. There is a power plant about a mile away. I could see it out of the window through all the tall weeds and dirty air.
My dad walked inside and lay on his bed without even thinking about all of the bed bugs and parasites that it could be filled with. He probably doesn’t even know the man that gave us this house that well. I think he is too grateful to not have to run anymore to the point where he doesn’t care about where he is. “Get your stuff and get comfortable. We might be here for a while,” he stated. “This is our new home.”
“Don’t ever call this trash bag a home,” I replied. “It’s repulsive.” And he just rolled his eyes at me. This day has been gone by so fast. It’s exactly 12 hours from when the cops were driving up to our house and within those 12 hours, we hopped our neighbor’s fences, took a plane to India, got a ride from some strange guy in a gross van, and moved into a nasty shack. Although I couldn’t stop thinking about Hailey. She was the only person that understood me. I don’t have internet or reception or even electricity. I pulled out my notebook and a pen and started writing.
“Hey Hailey,
It’s Brooke. I just want to let you know what has happened in the past day. To sum it up the police found my dad and we had to run away to India. Haha it’s kind of funny actually. Even though I’m scared to death. I don’t know how long we will be here, but it might be a while. My dad is passed out and my mom is sitting on the kitchen chair just staring off into the distance. Wish me luck. I miss you.”
I wrapped it up in an envelope and put it in my bag. Maybe they’ll have a mailbox at the market that Dev was talking about. I just realized something. I haven’t eaten at all today. It’s a perfect time to got to the market because we have no food. My dad and mom were both in shock still so I have to go by myself. That shouldn’t be a problem. I’m seventeen. I grabbed my bag and head out the door without even telling my parents that I was leaving.
Dev said that the market was down the street, which is true, but it took five minutes to get to the street from my house. It only took about ten minutes to get there from the street. I’m finally there and I’m feeling the most uncomfortable that I’ve ever felt. No one speaks English, it’s very unsanitary, and all the people looked at me like I just moved here from Jupiter. I didn’t belong here. I am still wearing pajamas and haven’t gotten ready at all today and I still look cleaner that just about everything and everyone here.
The first thing I did was look for a mailbox to put the letter in. There was one at the end of the street. After I put it in the box, I turned around and accidentally walked into a man. We made very awkward eye contact and then he squinted his eyes in anger a little bit. He looked like he was in his late twenties. I went around him and saw his whole crew squinting at me. Then, one of their eyes bugged out. He turned to the rest of his gang and whispered to them and looked at me. All of their eyes widened with shock and they all looked at me. I started fast walking away from them.
Once I got far enough away, I looked for some food stands. They had all sorts of food from all categories of the food triangle. I couldn’t even talk to the people that were there so I just kind of pointed at what I wanted. I bought this thing called Khichdi which is just rice, sauteed and cooked with daal and veggies. It was actually pretty good. I also brought home some basic things just to have at the house like fruits, vegetables, and grains. I realized that my whole family has had a really tough day so I bought some desserts for them too.
I continued to walk around the market because it was much more interesting than that old, disgusting house that made me depressed to think about. There were so many stands. I got to an area that had a bunch of little handmade toys and decorations. Even though I hate this place, the environment here kind of reminded me of the farmers markets back home. I always used to go to those to get fruit because the food there was always the best. I’d come home with three bags of different fruits and eat all of it in within the week and then go to the farmers market and get more. They had it once a week.
The food at this market has been really good, but I still don’t feel comfortable here. I can’t really talk to anyone because hardly anyone speaks English. I’d be lucky if I even found anyone who speaks Spanish. It’s going to be lonely here. I think the part of India that we are in is a really poor part. I remember learning about the system that they use here in history during school last year. It’s called the caste system and they use it to show the importance of people. It’s illegal to use, but they use it anyway. The lowest level is the Untouchables, and I think that’s what this town is.
I’ve decided that my parents are probably worried about me and I should start heading home. I started walking down the street of the market, then the empty road that had nothing but dead plants surrounding it. I was lugging a heavy bag of food and my backpack back to my house and I was moving so slow; it was taking twice as long to get there. I heard a branch break in the bush and I dropped my bag of food. “Great!” I shouted sarcastically. I picked them all up and continued walking. I heard another sound in the bush and started moving a little bit faster.
I am kind of nervous now because there isn’t anybody or even any animals around me. I’ll just keep an eye out. I continued to look around, but then lost track because I started thinking about Hailey. In those few minutes someone jumped out behind me and covered my head with a woven bag. He kicked the back of my knees and I fell to the ground. I kicked and screamed and two other men came over and grabbed my arms and legs.
I heard a car pull up to the curb and they opened the door and threw me into the back and tied my hands and feet, closed the door and took the bag off of my head. I still tried to squirm away and then my eyes focused and I saw who it was. The gang from the market, and Dev.

I closed my eyes for a few seconds to relax myself. When I opened them, the four guys were staring at me. "So this is Marcus's daughter?" asked one of the men.
"Yes it is," replied Dev. "She's going to tell us where our money is."
"What money?" I sternly asked.
"Don't play stupid. We know you're a smart girl and we know that you know that your dad owes us money from the bank robbery."
I told you that he probably robbed the bank. And now I know it's true. "Listen, I'm not surprised about what he did, but I was not involved," I answered.
“Okay girl, we will give you one more chance to tell us or you or we will have to kill," Dev stated.
"I don't know!" I shouted. I had a mean look in my eye. The men grabbed me once again and I kicked and screamed. I punched one in the face and his nose started bleeding so Dev slapped my face and that was too far. I twisted all of my limbs and pounced out of the moving van then tumbled on the floor. I saw the van back up and they followed me. I kept running until I saw the street that my house was on.
I hid in the tall weeds near my house so they couldn't find me. I just had to pray that they wouldn't pass where I was. They drove through the grass for about five minutes then realized I was long gone. Even though I wasn't. But they left and I ran to my house as quick as I could. My parents were sitting next to each other on the couch. They looked at me for a second then looked away and didn't even bother asking where I was. "I'm home," I announced.
"That's great sweetie. You're dad and I were just trying to get comfortable in our new home," my mom told me. This is not a home, this is a house. I'd never call this piece of trash a home. She still didn't ask me where I was. My dad had a drink in his hand and he already looked buzzed.
"Did you get us food? I’m so hungry, I could eat mom," my dad stated to me.
"I did, but then your good friend Dev and the rest of his gang kidnapped me and I dropped it all. They want their money, they said they would kill for it," I didn't expect much of a response because he was so zoned out. He just started giggling, but my mom replied.
"Oh my God that's crazy!" She got up and headed over to me. "Are you okay? Did they hurt you?" She inspected me and saw the red on my face and rest of my body and gave me a huge hug. "I'm so sorry honey; this wasn’t supposed to happen to you. Your dad needs to figure this out," she said to me sympathetically. "We can't live here anymore. Dev knows where we are and he is untrustable," she stated to my dad.
"Calm down! I'll figure it out!" My dad yelled at her. My mom was silent. She is too humble to do anything about my dad. My parents love each other, they really do. My dad is not abusive or anything, but he has a remote drinking problem which causes him to get angry quite easily.
    “Dad you need to chill,” I commented. “Mom, we will just talk to him about this tomorrow. He’s too messed up right now,” I told her.
    A few minutes later, she came up with an idea. “Let’s throw his beer off the roof,” she smirked. I giggled. It made me glad to see that she was coming back to normal and not as silent. She is all about revenge. She does it secretly though, like, she wants my dad to know that she threw it off the roof, but doesn’t want him to catch her do it. I like how she is like that. She is really good at being sneaky with it too.
    The sun has gone down and we could see just about every star in the sky. There were no lights around us and the ones in the house were very dim. My mom and I laid on the roof with a bag of my dad’s beer. He was passed out on the couch/my bed so he didn’t see us take it. My mom and I just lay there and watched the sky full of stars. It was pretty amazing. I’ve never seen so many stars at once. During that time we just appreciated life, even though it was very tough right then. I pulled out my notebook and started writing.
    “Hailey,
It’s Brooke again. My mom and I are lying on the roof and looking at all the stars. There are so many right now; it’s so beautiful. I wish you could be here with me. This man named Dev and his gang took me and threatened me and my family, but I got away, and as of right now, I’m okay. I will keep you updated on anything else that happens.”
    “What are you writing?” my mom questioned.
    “I’m just writing to Hailey, I sent her a letter earlier today. I really miss her,” I replied.
    “I know you do. Don’t worry, we’ll get out of here soon,” She said sympathetically. “Now let’s chuck these bottles!” She yelled excitedly. It was pretty entertaining. Throwing them with all the force I could and watching the glass and beer explode on the thin dirt really soothed my anger and tension. I guess you could say I’m calm, but in my head I can get really frustrated, I’m just good at hiding it.
It was now 11:34 pm and I needed to go to bed knowing how early I woke up. I still haven’t gotten dressed today and that disgusts me. I am a very clean person and I can’t see myself like this. I took a freezing cold shower because there isn’t hot water here. Then I brushed my teeth for about 5 minutes because I felt so dirty and then put on sweat pants and a tank top and headed to bed. My dad was still passed out on the couch so I asked my mom to help me move him. He was too heavy so we just carefully put him on the floor and dragged him into his and my mom’s room. We put a blanket over him and called it a night.
The couch was so uncomfortable. I didn’t fall asleep for three hours after I got in bed. I only slept for a half an hour at a time and then woke up about fifteen minutes in between. It was a terrible night.
I also had a very bad dream. The men came for me again. They took my whole family. We were all locked in separate rooms in a lab. I could see my mom in her cell and my dad in his. They came in my mom’s room and took her to a chair and injected her with something. They went into my room and held my eyes open so I had to watch her suffer. She was screaming in pain for a few minutes and then passed out, dead.
I looked over to my dad and they were tying his arms and legs and then took his arms and tied it to a pole on the sealing. They took a whip and whipped him so hard and he couldn’t even clutch where he was hurting for comfort. After they did that they tied the whip around his neck and hung him. They were torturing my family.
I started to scream and cry and kick, but the men in the black tarps had a hold of my arms and legs. Dev came into the room and held my mouth open. He poured a liquid down my throat. He plugged my nose then held my mouth shut until I swallowed it. He then let go and I started to cough and soon enough I couldn’t breathe. It felt like he was grabbing onto my neck and choking me, but he wasn’t. He just sat back and watched me suffocate.

Then, I woke up, coughing and hyperventilating. I think I actually choked myself in my sleep. I got up and got some water and walked into my parents’ room just to make sure they were okay. I knew they would be because it was only a dream, but I felt the need to check anyway. I peeked over the corner and smiled because I was happy to be reminded that it was just a dream. It was 3:23 am and I was exhausted still. I think I will sleep a little bit better now that the bad dream was over and everything is okay.
Strolling back to the couch, I heard a noise from outside. It kind of sounded like a rock being crushed. The only reason I got paranoid by this is because of our location. It’s an abandoned shack in the middle of nowhere. Nobody knows where we are other than the gang. I looked outside to see what it was. All I saw was headlights speeding away from my house. They probably knew that they made a noise so they sprinted off. I wonder what they were going to do. I just went back to sleep.
In the morning my mom made eggs. I don’t know how she even got them. She probably went to the market really quick or something. They weren’t bad so that’s probably what she did. After that, I cleaned up. I have no one to impress so why put on makeup and dress nice. I just threw on a big band shirt and yoga pants and I put my hair up in a messy bun. My family woke up really early because none of us could sleep, so I climbed to the roof and watched the sun rise.
Later, I had to go to the market to send Hailey my newest letter. I informed my parents just so they didn’t worry and then I headed off. I kept a super close eye out for Dev and the others. I even brought a knife with me just to be safe. The air was really thick today. I could see dirt particles flying around and it was hard for me to breathe. I could feel the dead skin and dirt going into my nose and mouth as I inhaled. I could even smell the smoke from the power plant around me. It smelt of burning oil. There was also a ton of trash scattered on the floor such as papers that they serve you food in from the market and shattered bottles.
When I got to the market I bought a bunch of water for my family. I even bought a cart to carry them in because they were so heavy. I also stocked up on food in hope that I wouldn’t see the gang again. I took my time at the market today. I’m not sure why, I just really liked the environment.
I was walking down the street and a lady stopped me. “You don’t look like you belong here,” she commented. “You’re much too pretty and white to be with us untouchables.”
“Thank you?” I questioned.
“What are you doing here?” she asked me. “Do you even speak Hindi?”
“That isn’t your business and no I don’t,” I replied. “Why?”
“I’m just curious that’s all,” she smiled. “Would you like to learn?”
“Not right now, thanks. I’ll find you when I need to learn.”
Now that I think about it I do need to learn. I have picked up a little bit off the street, but not enough. It’s not like I’ll be going to school here or anything, but it’s nice to learn.
I peered across the street to the other stand and saw someone. He was buying homemade beer from some random man. “Dad!” I shouted. “What are you doing?” He stared at me with bug eyes and kind of tried to hide his face, but it was too late.
“Don’t tell mom!” He jokingly demanded.
I persuaded him to not buy the beer and so we left the market and started walking home. I still had the cart filled with food and water and other things and we just talked. It was nice to have a conversation with my dad. He was actually somewhat sober which I am very proud of him for.
We were so close to home. We almost made it without any distractions or interruptions. But no, something had to get in the way. In the far distance I could see the headlights of a van; Dev’s van. I couldn’t see anything but the headlights for a while, but then I saw a man poking his body out the window with a gun.
“Brooke, run!” my dad screamed as he took my cart and ran into the cloud of dirt surrounding my house. I sprinted with him and the van followed. We charged to my house and ran in with the cart and slammed the door. We jumped to the floor and ran into the bedroom to get my mom and my dad’s gun. We all stayed on the ground.
I hid under the bed while my mom and dad discussed what was happening. There was complete silence coming from outside, but who knew what that meant. They could be trying to break in or waiting for us to come out. About 10 minutes has passed and we were still panicking on the ground. I peeked my head looking out the window and they were sitting on the roof of the van with guns and what looked like a grenade then I ducked down instantly.
Right after that I heard and saw bullets go through the windows. They were from a machine gun. They shot through our front door and all the windows in our house. One of them got an axe and came up to my parents’ bedroom window, he looked at us through the window, squinted, and smashed it with the axe.
Then he threw the grenade inside. My whole family screamed and huddled close. My dad got his gun and shot and the man. He hit him in the arm and the man fell down, but did not die. Dev and the other two came and picked up the third guy then ran to the van and drove off.
The grenade ticked for a few seconds and the ticking got faster and faster. My family tried to get up and out of the house, but my mom wouldn’t move, she was in shock.
“Kelly! Get up! We’re going to die!” my dad screamed. She just laid there shaking with her hands over her ears. The ticking was super fast and then it stopped. The grenade let off smoke and I couldn’t see anything but it. There was so much smoke that I couldn’t breathe. I started choking and had to hold my breath. I could feel my dad grab my wrist and pull me out of the house. I could finally see.
My dad took a big gasp of air and ran inside to get my mom. I couldn’t see anything inside, but I waited at the bottom of the stairs and listened to my dad screaming at her to get up and both of them coughing. Then I only heard one person coughing. My dad had to drag my mom through the house and out the front door. And there she was lying on the porch.

He dragged her out the door and fell to the floor. He quickly put his hands over her heart and started giving her CPR. She was knocked out. Her eyes were closed and she wasn’t breathing and didn’t have a pulse. I ran up to her and laid my head on her chest and started bawling.
She was long gone, it has been 5 minutes of her not breathing and she is not coming back. I grasped my dad so tight. I needed this comfort right now. My heart was pounding so fast. It doesn’t feel real. I feel so weak. I fell to the floor and just cried into the porch. My dad kissed her on the forehead and I saw a tear fall from his eye. He never cries. I clutched her hand and knew I would have to leave her soon. I didn’t want to. I never wanted to.
Two hours have passed and I am still crying. There is nothing here that I can use to get my mind off of what happened. I have to eat out of pity and that might just make me a little bit happier. I grabbed some fruits and climbed to my roof. I just sat there and looked off into the distance. Time has been going by so slow. I can’t handle this.
I feel the need to talk to my dad. He’s all that I have left for comfort. I went inside and he was lying on his bed, looking up at the ceiling. I lied next to him and did the same thing. “Dev needs to go. We came here to escape. Not to get chased by a new group,” my dad stated.
“What happened between you and him? I mean like what did you do?” I asked. My dad paused for a few seconds and took a deep breath. “It’s okay dad. I know the things you do. I’m used to it, just tell me.” I told him.
He said under his breath, “Robbed a bank.” He looked like he was about to cry again. That’s what I assumed he did so I’m not surprised. “Dev and the rest of them helped me and I promised I would pay them.”
“Well why haven’t you?” I questioned.
“I don’t have it. I felt guilty and threw it into the lake…” he answered. That, I was shocked about. I was actually pretty proud of him, but I don’t know what to do about Dev.
“Well what do we do?” Wow I was full of questions.
“I don’t know,” my dad responded. After that he said nothing else. I think he was contemplating what to do. The silence made me cry. There is no music or TV or anything so I have no choice but to think about everything that has happened. It’s getting late so I’m just going to go to bed. I didn’t even get into pajamas or anything. There is no point.
The next couple of weeks I’ve been doing the same things. Moping around, going to the market, eating, writing letters to Hailey. I’ve been so depressed. I haven’t talked to an actual person other than my dad in about a week. It has only been a few weeks, but it feels like it has been years. I’m so bored of this life. Every day is either bad or neutral. Nothing good happens, ever.
Today my dad and I wanted to do something kind of fun. We went to the market around 11:30 pm and it was a nice change. My dad and I bonded a lot. It was still not enough to boost my spirit by much. We got some dessert and just walked around and looked at the stars. There were many shops and stands still open because it is hard to make money here. We have quite a bit of money left though from my dad’s past robberies of stores and things like that.
We got back at around 1:00pm and still weren’t tired so we just lay on the roof and watched the stars. The roof is my favorite place right now. It makes me relaxed, especially at night. I write all my letters to Hailey up there. I still haven’t gotten any back from her, but I feel like I will soon. She would write me back no matter what.
I had a dream about my mom last night. It was kind of a dream. It was more like pictures; kind of like my life in pictures. It was a montage of me and my family and at one point my mom was gone. It continued farther than that though. It went into the future. Soon after my mom, my dad was gone. Then it was just me. I woke up right after and couldn’t sleep the rest of the night.
Later in the day when I went to my daily shopping at the market, there was an envelope on the sidewalk kind of close to my house. It supposed to go to my house. Guess who it was from. Hailey! She wrote me back! I rushed inside my house forgetting about the market. I jumped on my dad to wake him up and yelled, “Hailey wrote me back!”
He woke up and grabbed the envelope, “Oh my God! She did! Open it up!” He shouted with excitement. What I like about my dad is that he feels the same feelings as me. That’s just how much he cares about me. He gets upset from seeing me upset. And if I’m happy, he’s happy. I read what she wrote out loud so my dad could hear.
“Brooke, I love you so much. I hope you’re okay. Knowing your family I’m not too surprised this happened, but still be careful. I’ll make sure to tell everyone that you had to move, but don’t worry, I won’t give out any secret stuff. Be safe and keep me updated! I love you! Bye!” Is what she wrote. She also wrote other things, but I couldn’t say it out loud because my dad was right next to me.
“That was sweet,” my dad smiled. He was proud of me for making the best out of this terrible thing. I’m proud of myself too. When I got this letter back I felt less alone. The last couple of weeks I felt like I was in another universe, but now I’m realizing we are all on the same planet. I’ve left my state, but not my world.
I went down to the market much happier today. I deeply breathed the dirty air and gave a little smile. I tried to have conversations with people at the market with the Hindi I picked up. I saw that lady that wanted to teach me Hindi again. I smiled and waved and asked for a short lesson. We went into a little bakery and sat down as she tried to teach me.
I caught on pretty quick. About an hour later I thanked her and bought her some sweet bread and coffee in return. It was pretty bad quality, but it was better than nothing.
I walked out of the bakery doors and saw one of the men from Dev’s gang, but he was alone. That’s weird; I thought they went everywhere together. He was strolling down the street with a suitcase about to explode from being so full. He looked depressed. I was deciding whether to talk to him or not. I’m just going to leave it alone. He did try to kill me and my family...
We were walking the opposite ways so we eventually had to pass each other. We made very awkward eye contact. I was shaking of fear as I passed him. A few steps after we passed he stopped and turned around.

He headed toward me. It was more like a stroll. He didn’t seem upset with me or anything, but I was still scared. Why wouldn’t I be? I slowly backed up because I didn’t want him too close to me, but I still wanted to give him a chance to talk to me. “I’m not going to hurt you,” he stated. “Why would I. It’s not like you matter anymore.”
“I still can’t trust you. What do you want? Where are the rest of them?” I questioned.
“I was kicked out of the gang. ‘I’m useless’ they said.” he replied as he showed me the stump left from his arm. Then I remembered; he’s the man my dad shot. They must have had to remove his arm or something. Now he can’t help them.
“It got infected so they had to cut it off. Then, they sent me away. I’ve been living on the street for 3 days now.” he told me.
“Why are you telling me this?” I asked him.
“Because I want to help you. I know where they are and everything about them. There is no catch, I just want to destroy them.” he answered.
I don’t think my dad and I were planning on doing anything to them. We haven’t heard from them since the incident with my mom.
“They are planning on kidnapping your dad. Then you.” he added.
“I’ll talk to my dad. I’ll come back here tomorrow and let you know,” I said. Now I’m paranoid. I went and bought a little pocket knife before I went home just in case.
The whole walk home I was thinking about the man. I don’t even know if he was telling the truth. But what do I have to lose I guess. I couldn’t get this out of my head. I can’t think about anything else. I have so many questions. When? Why, we don’t even have the money? Where are they? How can we avoid the attack? It’s just crawling around in my brain and it’s giving me a headache.
When I got home I instantly talked to my dad. I let him know that I saw the guy from the gang and before I could even tell him what he said; my dad looked at me with bug eyes and firmly said, “Never talk to him.” That kind of made me scared to tell him that I did, but I knew I had to. So I told him everything.
“We are never allowing him to ‘help’ us. He tried to kill you and me and did kill mom. We can’t ever trust any of them,” he responded.
    Honestly, I want to give him a chance, but my dad made a good point. I don’t even know the guys’ name. But I can feel in my gut that I can trust him.
    “You don’t even want to give him a chance?” I asked my dad.
    “Never,” he replied.
    I just accepted it and left the room. This made me mad. I want to give him a chance. My mom would, but only if my dad said it was okay. If he said no, she would do it secretly. I guess that’s what I’ll do. Wow I miss my mom. She would support me so much right now and be such a big help.
    I just left and went into the living room to write to Hailey. I haven’t told her about my mom yet. I don’t know what she’ll say about that. She thought of my mom as her own mom since we were so close. I wrote exactly this.
    “Hi Hailey... Something terrible has happened to my family. The gang attacked us. They left off a bomb in my house that makes you unable to breathe. My dad and I got out in time, but not my mom... She didn’t make it. I just thought you should know this. Please write back.”
Then I went to bed. I cried myself to sleep that night. Just writing about my mom made me remember her and it just hurts me because she was such a great person. This shouldn’t have happened. I really want that guy to help us. If we somehow got rid of the gang then maybe I would be able to sleep at night. I’m just confusing myself when I say get rid of them though. Am I going to kill them? I would like to, but that’s still illegal. I guess we will see what happens.
I woke up again at 2:00 am and instantly thought of my problem. I can’t think about anything else. I don’t know what my dad has in mind to keep us safe. If he can’t trust that guy, there is no chance we will ever be free from the gang. What do we have to lose? I’d rather die than live in fear. I just need to get all this stress off my mind for one second. I got up off the couch and went into the kitchen. I need something to distract me. Anything. I hate this lifestyle of no internet or cable. I can’t even listen to music which is what I spend most of my time doing. This is terrible.
I sat at the kitchen table for 2 hours playing with fruit. This is what my desperation for distraction has come to. I think I’m kind of becoming crazy. I need a friend or someone to talk to. I know that my dad is around, but he doesn’t understand. This is more than me being scared. Now it’s how scared I am and how lonely I am. This is getting bad. Now that I think about I honestly don’t know what I’m feeling. I’ve never felt like this before. It’s a terrible feeling of loneliness. I feel like I’m on a separate planet. All by myself. This feels never-ending.
I started to cry. I want someone to cry on. I flung on the couch and grabbed and pillow and started bawling. I closed my eyes and pretended the pillow was Hailey. I wish it was her. She would make me feel so much better. I couldn’t stop myself from crying. It’s been an hour. It is now 5:00 am and I’m still crying. I don’t know how this is even possible.
I was tossing and turning on the couch with my head in the pillow. I couldn’t get comfortable whatsoever. I threw the pillow across the room and broke a candle stand. It felt good to hear the clay candle holder break. The shattering noise it made helped my anger. I looked around and saw that there were more holders. I got up and flung them across the room without thinking twice about it.
“Brooke!” my dad shouted. I didn’t respond. “Brooke! What was that!?” he yelled again. I still didn’t respond. I continued throwing and breaking things around the room. It felt good. I knocked paintings off the walls and grabbed at bat and smashed the windows. I heard my dad’s footsteps sprinting down the hall. I completely ignored them. I didn’t even look at my dad when he got in the living room. I just felt hands come up behind me and grab my arms. I kicked and screamed loose.
I threw the chairs from the kitchen table at the door and broke it open. I ran outside with my bat and smashed the walls. My dad followed me out and pounced on me, knocking me to the ground. I was on my back and he was sitting on my stomach. He held my arms and legs down and I tried to get out, but I couldn’t. I even tried spitting in his face. I started to hyperventilate for a few seconds and then I just saw black. It’s all I saw. I couldn’t hear anything either. But I think I am awake. I feel awake.
After what felt like about 30 seconds. I could see and hear again. Once I could, I opened my eyes and my mom was tapping on me and telling me to wake up.

“Honey, wake up,” she softly said. “We’ve got to get to the airport for our vacation.”
    “Vacation? What vacation?” I asked. I don’t even know where I am right now. I was in India a few minutes ago and my mom sure wasn’t around.
    “Are you serious? You’ve been so excited to go for months. We’re going to Florida!” She stated. Now I know exactly what vacation she was talking about. When I was in 8th grade we won a huge trip to Florida. I now know this this is a flashback. Or a dream. Actually, I think it kind of is both because I am seeing it in my point of view yet it is of something that has happened before.
    Now that I think about it, I hope this dream never ends. We were about to go on the best vacation of our lives and the best part is that my mom was still here. I know that when I wake up, I will go back to the terrible life that I have with only my dad in some weird, abandoned, disgusting house in India. I thought why not take advantage of the situation, so I did.
    I got out of bed and grabbed my mom. I gave her the biggest hug I’ve ever gave anyone. She hugged me back of course, but she was still confused.
    “What’s this?” she asked sweetly.
    “I’m thankful for this moment. I love you mom,” I stated.
    “I love you too sweetie,” she replied.
    I continuously hugged her for as long as I could. I closed my eyes and prayed that this would last forever. I opened my eyes the slightest bit and realized that everything around me was starting to swirl. My mom let go of me and started to wave.
    “Goodbye sweetie. I love you,” she told me. I started being pulled back by I don’t even know what.
    “What!? No!? What’s happening!?” I screamed. I tried to pull forward and go back to my mom, but I couldn’t. My mom was just waving goodbye. “No! No!” I repeatedly yelled. Everything around me was getting darker and darker, and then everything around me was pitch black. I see nothing but black. I squirmed and yelled and still tried to get out of the mysterious things grabbing me, but there was no luck. The dream was over and now I’m going back to my depressing life.
    I slowly opened my eyes. My dad was shaking me to wake me up. “Brooke!” Wake up!” he was yelling as I opened my eyes. He saw that I was awake and gasped in relief. I noticed that my dream was over and I was back to normal and it scared me because of how terrible my normal life is. I once again started to hyperventilate and squeal and cry.
    “Shhh,” my dad whispered as he held my face. He looked like he was about to cry. “I already lost mom, I can’t lose you too. Sweetie, please calm down,” he whispered. I tried to relax. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths. “That’s good honey, just relax,” he told me.
    After I stopped having a panic attack he slowly walked me into the living room and laid me on the couch. He brought me a glass of water and sat with me. I was still crying a little bit, but I am not freaking out anymore. It’s hard to get my mind though because there is nothing here to distract me. “Dad. What’s happening to me?” I asked.
“I’m not sure. I know that you had a panic attack, but I don’t know why. Do you know what that was about?” he replied.
“Well… Yeah… I just feel lonely. I miss Hailey. I miss mom. All the crazy things that have been happening are building up and I cracked.” I replied. I’m still freaking out on the inside. I’m just controlling it right now. If anything else happens. I’ll explode. I can’t stand this stress.
“This is my fault. I was never mature enough with you. I need to fix myself,” he sighed. “I’m so sorry. I can never forgive myself. I’m now realizing that I am the reason for all of this. I’m also realizing how bad I want to go home. I just am not free enough to go home and feel safe.”
“It’s not safe here either,” I responded. I feel terrible that he thinks that this is all his fault. It’s not; people are just getting in the way of things and it is causing issues. “And Dad, it’s not your fault. Don’t blame yourself,” I couldn’t stand to see him like this. This family has already fallen apart and it’s just getting worse.
My dad decided to lay on the couch next to me. He started to breath heavily and try to relax. My dad and I both looked like we were in shock. We can only care for each other yet we are both in need. This needs to be solved. I jolted off the couch and rummaged through the drawers to find a piece of paper. I found a small notepad. I flipped to a clean page and labeled it “Plan”.
I wrote exactly what we needed to do. Find the guy from the gang and have him help us. Find where the gang is and take over their shelter.