Rain began to pour as we sat in the grass and we jumped up squealing, rushing to get to the house before we got soaked. As soon as we got into the house we quickly stopped, voices silenced and just the sound of rain beating on the rooftop could be heard. Dad had a headache, again.

My childhood was full of silence but didn’t lack joy. The absence of sound was rather out of worry and love for my dad, he has chronic migraines. With each migraine it is a war that he is fighting; some days he is victorious, but most of these battles, he looses. Each loss results in closed dark rooms as he stays away from the light and sound. His body cannot endure the pain as he vomits, trying to get better. This didn’t just start in my early years, all of my six older siblings grew up with our father being sick. We learned that being quiet was the best way to live around the house; some of us better at this than others. All of our voices hush when in the presence of our dad; any loud sound able to trigger his migraines. My mother had to return to work to support the family because my dad couldn’t work full time. Dad would stay at home to help raise the kids and recover from his daily headaches. This struggle would result in us having to live paycheck-to-paycheck trying to save in any way we could. Our family continues to fight these battles today, but we live a happy life. Being the last of seven kids isn’t easy, especially with a sick dad and full time working mom, but I am able to gain an understanding that makes me forever grateful. My dad isn’t just a sick man; he is a lot more than that. He is a teacher to college students with the use of his PhD in Chemistry, but also to us. He teaches us kindness, laughter, and love. He is a quiet man that shows us love through actions and is always making us happy. On the days his migraine get the best of him we show him that love back, helping in any way we can. Learning to love someone more than myself started with my dad, for all of us.

Last week, I arrived at the doctor’s office with many questions about the sickness I get when I go in the ocean. As I explained the chills and the pounding feelings I get she told me that I get migraines triggered by the cold, like my dad. The fear of the future started to creep up on me and for my future family. But an overwhelming sense of peace came over me as I thought of what an imperfectly perfect childhood I had. My parents made a hard situation bring so much joy and I hope I can teach my children the type of love they taught me.