I'm sixteen years old, and my family tells me I need to hide my story, my life and my pain. I am ready to share my story and give hope to others.

Growing up was hard for me, My Father left when i was 3 and my mom tried her hardest but I always felt alone, and not worth it. My mom dated this one guy who hit me and hurt her, and she left that relationship, Thank Gosh!

Then I heard about God and of course like any other six year old on earth. I thought wow! I can be safe and happy and protected so I went to church with my Grandpa and Grandma.

When I was eight my mom got with this new guy, we all thought he was sweet and kind. He moved in with us, my mom got pregnant and they were married. During that hell broke lose, he believed in hitting as punishment so my little sisters the two older ones were hit. I was molested for 4 years, and was too scared to tell anyone due to him telling me I would get taken away and never see my family again, that scared me to death. Right before I turned 12 I was raped by him 2 or 3 times a day for a year. I thought it was normal. It tore me apart I could not believe there was a God I was getting hurt so much.

Two weeks before my 13th birthday he was killed. I swore it was my fault. Sometimes i still do.

November of that year I was hospitalized because I tried to kill myself. I thought I was fine for a while then I started cutting. I even thought about alcohol and drugs to cover the pain.

I was in and out of my moms house, and my lying, cutting and depression was effect school, family, and relationships.

I went back to the hospital for hallucinations a year later, I was put on medication, and right when I got out I tried bulimia.

A year later I went back to the hospital for being bullied but I was going to church and I thought I was saved but I wasn't.

May 2013 I was hospitalized for trying to overdose due to being bullied nonstop by my family,I almost died.I was saved in the hospital, and that saved me.

I still have thoughts of cutting and sometimes I break and cut a little but I am getting there. I realize that my life effects everyone around me. I'm ready to move on to live a happy life.

I hope you can gain a little hope from a girl with more than she thought and realize you are special and deserve everything.

Thank you for your time.