“Oh man, I am so high right now,” laughs my friend’s friend. He’s at our lunch table, stuffing French fries into his mouth like he hasn’t eaten in days. His skin is flushed red and his eyes have a funny look about him. “That cop over there is looking right at you,” my friend points out, snickering. The boy just laughs and moves tables. “Wanna go out for a smoke?” another girl with boy’s hair at the table asks my friend. “Yeah, just lemme finish eating first.” She stuffs fries into her mouth and gulps down the last of the chocolate milk. “Hannah, don’t!” complains Ashley, another member of the group. “It’s bad for you and I thought you quit!” “Whatever.” Hannah throws her trash away and slumps back into her seat. Several others go outside behind the school. What are they smoking? I wonder. I decide I don’t want to find out.
The next night, I text Hannah, who was my best friend in the world two years ago. Somehow the conversation gets on drugs. The conversation goes something like this:
Hannah: Have you ever done marijuana? Would you?
Me: No. And maybe, just to see what it’s like. Like in college or whatever.
Hannah: When is your birthday?
Me: June! Its way past, haha. Where’s my prezzie?
Hannah: Oh lol never mind. What about Christmas? You could come over and try it.
I think about it. I’m ashamed to say it, but I honestly do consider saying yes. It would be easy, and I wouldn’t get caught. I’m so curious; I want to know what being ‘bad’ feels like. Maybe this would be my chance to get rid of the good little perfect nerd image I so despise. I want to say yes, but I don’t.
Me: No way! My mom would kill me! Plus I need all my brain cells, lol. I might do something stupid.
Hannah: You could spend the night and I would watch you! I wouldn’t do any so you would be fine.
Me: Nah, that’s ok.
Hannah: K.
And that was the end of that. But still, almost six months later, I wonder what would have happened if I had said yes that night. Would I be here to type this story up? What kind of ending would it have? I have vowed never to say yes to drugs. I am allowed to be tempted, that’s ok, but I will never say yes. Not even in college. I consider that day to be my own personal fork in the road; the day I chose to remain who I am.