Everyday kids around the world are exposed to vile things online that will most likely leave them psychologically scarred for life. “Cell phone babysitting” is on the rise, and so is the delay in babies’ development.  It’s not the children’s fault though—far from it. YPulse, a company focused on youth marketing research and insights, has found that about 90% of millennial parents have given their children some type of tech device. The internet gives kids access to the entire world at their fingertips, but they’re left vulnerable and unprotected.

A majority of millennials feel that this is necessary; they just don’t have the time to deal with their own children. Technology “aids” them in a way, but they don’t know what it’s actually doing and teaching their kids. By roaming the internet freely, youth uncover topics they should never know about until later in adulthood, or should never know about at all. An article from 2018 by the American Academy of Pediatrics found that about 1 in 5 youths are exposed to unwanted and  inappropriate material online. That includes violence, sex, and hate speech, which eventually desensitizes kids to these topics—and may even make them crave it. This in turn leads to more aggressive behavior towards family and friends, along with underdeveloped communication skills and sometimes even depression. Which is terrible, but has unfortunately been accepted as “normal” in this day and age. Another article by Pew Research Center states, “39% of parents report using parental controls for blocking, filtering or monitoring.” Only 39% of parents look out for their kids online, which is sad and disappointing. It’s also unsurprising.

Today’s kids are being ignored and neglected by  parents way too much, which is pathetic and dangerous. It seems that parents would rather give their child a screen than actually spend quality time with them, or give them books or other toys to occupy themselves with. They actively participate in letting technology take over their role of parenting, resulting in terrible consequences for their children. An article from Psychology Today shows that, “Less connection—the real kind—means that families aren’t able to build relationships as strong as they could be nor are they able to maintain them as well. As a result, children will feel less familiarity, comfort, trust, security, and, most importantly, love from their parents. There is also less sharing which means that parents know less about what is going on in their children’s lives and, consequently, have less ability to exert influence over them.” Children are being split apart from their family because of a technological wall that’s provided to them by their parents. Bonds are being broken so parents have more time for work, or so they can lengthen their own screen time.

Personally, I have seen way too many children be affected by unsupervised internet usage. Little cousins glued to tablet and phone screens, who become short tempered little divas that scream and cry when they’re not allowed the usual 4-6 hours of technology they almost always get. Kids whose empathy hasn’t developed because their parents would rather watch 90 Day Fiancé instead of just talking to their child. It’s understandable though, when parents say they work all the time and can’t always physically be there—but the least they could do is make time to check on what their kid is doing. For example, I know a boy with a millennial mother who rarely spends time with him because she’s too busy working. He’s an “iPad kid,” and has very extreme mood swings—and somewhat violent tendencies towards himself and others. But because his internet use wasn’t closely monitored, it was later found out that this boy was listening to Hitler speeches, and liking and saving them onto his online library. Eventually cops showed up at his house because he had stated online that he was going to “shoot up an elementary school.” He said that he was “joking” when he said that, but even saying something like that is horrible. This was the outcome of neglect and no parental supervision when online. But the saddest thing is, this boy could be a good kid. There’s rare moments when he’s not using technology—when his mind is free from its digital prison—he’s really a sweet boy who loves his older sibling with all his heart. Even so, this side of him is almost never seen. He can be gentle, kind, funny, and loving—but the grip and dependency technology has on him is slowly eating away at this part of him. Which is awful because at his core  he can truly be a good kid, and all of this could have been avoided if someone looked after him instead of being raised by the internet. The sad thing is, this boy isn’t the only child being negatively affected by technology. I’ve seen this story play out too many times—even to myself. I was young and unsupervised online. You’d search up a cartoon character you like because you want to draw her, and you’d forgotten what the pattern on her dress looked like. But instead, you find highly inappropriate photos of the character that you didn’t understand, and didn’t want to see. Much of my generation, and generations after us, were introduced to so much information we should have never seen because there was no one to protect us online.

Parents should educate themselves about this ongoing technological youth crisis. Modern parental blocks and spyware have become increasingly easy to navigate, and most online devices have an option to limit your screen time. It won’t kill you to take the time to sit with your child and spend time with them, instead of automatically giving them phones or tablets. Situations like what happened to me and to the boy I know are why parenting and online supervision is so important. Without it, childhoods can be ruined.