1st grade. Everything is nice. Little kids doing their work, talking to their friends about their day and making up stories for attention. Sitting there, I take part in the little conversations that they make laughing happily and making a few jokes every here and there. I was a pretty normal kid although thinking about it now it's kinda sad how insecure I was at such a young age. Going back to when I started first grade, I enter the classroom and all the kids are huddled up in the little red carpet on the floor listening to the teacher tell a story. Everyone was staring and my mother was saying goodbye before she left the school. I find it rather stupid how all my insecurities started, comparing myself with others just because i liked a boy and i thought i wasn't good enough. From that day I started wearing jackets. I wore jackets zipped all the way up to hide my body. It's like a shield that protects myself from everyone else. With the jacket I can hide myself, no matter how hot it was outside I never took it off. Everyone asked why I always had it zipped up. I don't remember what I told them but they usually only asked once and then never asked again. This went on from 1st grade all the way to 4th. I can't go to school without a jacket. It's my comfort, without it I feel so vulnerable. In fact, I can't go anywhere without a jacket. If no jacket, then long sleeves. This made me absolutely despise summer. “Wear some shorts and short sleeves” is what my mom always tells me. I could never. It's so uncomfortable. No shorts and only long sleeves. From there it got a bit better. I still put on the jackets but I atleast didnt zip it all the way up.