I didn’t know that Maggie had snapped the photo until I plugged the cherry red USB into my computer after picking it up from Art’s Cameras Plus. When the folder opened up, I was ecstatic. Finally, the memories flooded my head as my mind took me back to the best week of my life in the Boundary Waters of Minnesota.

It was the second night of our youth group trip and I was reading my Bible during quiet time, immersed in the magnificent world around me. The creaky trees towered over me as the wind whistled past my face, my hat violently thrashing in the wind secured scarcely by the thin strap beneath my chin. The birds sang songs amongst each other as the waves fluttered back and forth in their same, unchanging cycle, covering countless unseen mysteries in their vast depths. The peace that God provided us within His delicate creation was mesmerizing.

Silence is deadly: maybe that’s why God made it impossible to escape sound. Even in the remote Minnesota wilderness, sound could not be escaped. Whether it was a loon howling in the night or a barren tree thundering down to the forest floor as it embarked on the way of all things, I greatly appreciated the little details and simplicity that could be seen throughout His creation. The busy forest revealed only a brief stroke of how much detail God had painted into the world—it was the perfect atmosphere to dive into His word and understand three basic questions about life: Where do we come from? Why are we here? Where are we going?

A few months before the canoe trip, I had just completed a nine-month recovery from ACL reconstruction surgery and was excited to return to normal when COVID-19 canceled everything. Suddenly, the lockdowns began, and my hope in this world was shattered. I realized how unpredictable this life is and pursued God with my whole heart, knowing that He is the only thing in life that is stable. A few months later, He gave me a sense of normalcy that I will never take for granted. After a year of hardships, I was finally able to physically challenge myself in the Boundary Waters of Minnesota. 

I had no idea how important this trip would be for me, wedged between two of the hardest times in my life. While I thought that my life would return to normal after so many hardships, God had different plans for me to finish off 2020. For the second time, I tore my ACL in my final soccer game during the state final four months later. Suddenly, I was back into the nightmare I had just gotten out of.

On the way to that final game, the lyrics “I forgot the joy of suffering” struck my soul as the bus traveled to the field that was about to change my life. I recalled my first recovery full of pain, sweat, and tears, and smiled because I realized that it made me pursue God with my whole heart—I wouldn’t take it back for anything! As I embark on another nine-month recovery, I am full of joy because I know that I am an ordinary person with extraordinary scars and still becoming who I am meant to be. It’s amazing that my hope is in the hands that bled for me and that God does all things for the good of those who love Him.

As Paul says in his letter to the Romans, our present suffering isn't worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed within us. It’s so cool that my faith is based on God’s free gift, not my circumstances or works. The fact that this world is imperfect and that God came down voluntarily as a man named Jesus to deliver me from my pain by dying on a cross to give me hope in a perfect world after my death is extraordinary. And I don’t have to do anything but believe in Him? It’s miraculous.

As I go through another nine-month recovery, I look forward to looking back at these troubling times and rejoicing in my hardships. While these past few years have certainly been hard, I am overjoyed because of God’s loving and faithful character. After all, what greater love is there than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends? Regardless of what happens to me in my life, nothing can take away my joy.

That cherry red USB contains more than just pictures. It takes me back to all the laughs, the experiences, and the good times with my friends when I had two healthy knees. But most importantly, that one picture is a reminder of when God pulled my stone heart out of my body. Weeping by the lake as I recalled my sin, struggles, hardships, and insecurities, I remembered that all of those things were wiped away when Jesus died for me at Calvary.