The night started like any other, laying in bed around midnight, texting my favorite people. I get a text from the boy I liked for a few months, the jolt of adrenaline shot through my body when I read his name. He was perfect, blonde hair, blue eyes, and kind. He had everything I wanted. We got lost in conversation that night, we were up til almost three. Talking, about everything that came to our minds. That night after the goodnights were sent, and the few flirty messages after that, I thought to myself, “I never want to lose him.” At that moment, I knew that I had fallen for this amazing boy.

It all started at the beginning of the school year. My friend and his family were moving and decided to have one last party. I went not knowing what to expect. Once I got there I realized, his older brother was having one too. I hung out with some kids from my grade then someone convinced me to play the game spin the bottle. I agreed after seeing this one particular boy sit down in the circle. The game started with kisses on the cheeks, then it progressed. Every time my turn came up I hoped it would land on one specific boy. I have no clue how it happened until after the game, he came up and talked to me. We kept talking and talking throughout the rest of the night. We walked around on a path by the house and we eventually got to the highway, where I realized that this was going somewhere. After we decided to go back, we sat on the swings and kept talking. Eventually, we made it back inside and we laid on a giant bean bag. He asked to see my phone and changed his name. Then,  I took his and changed mine. We kept snapping that night and he eventually asked if I liked anyone. Me being a scared little 13- year old I said “idk” instead of saying how I felt. He said “same…” I asked what he meant and thankfully he said: “I think I might like you a little bit”. I remember the butterflies I got, I couldn’t sleep all night. I just sat there and replayed that amazing night over and over again until I drifted off.

The months went on, we talked every day, we hung out at games, even at church. I would do anything just to see him. I even snuck out of class a few times to go talk with him. But there was one night, that we couldn’t stop talking. We both had tournaments the next morning, but we didn’t care. He opened up to me about everything, and I opened up to him in a way I’ve never opened up to anyone before. It was amazing, this boy I never thought I’d even talk to is now a boy I can’t get off of my mind. That night, I knew, I had fallen in love.

Sadly, all good things must come to an end. The best thing in my life had disappeared. That hit differently. The boy I was so madly in love with, the one who made me feel like everything was okay, was gone. I spent 9 amazing months with an amazing boy, and for that, I am so grateful. Even though it’s been a year, I still love him. Love isn’t something you can just get over. So, when the person you love isn’t there anymore, it hurts.

Young love is a part of growing up. We all fall in love with someone at some point. Don’t let anyone tell you it’s not love if you feel it, it is. Yes, I learned heartbreak sucks but you learn so much more about yourself after. Even though I still love him, and it still hurts, I’m glad he was my first love. I feel lucky because the boy I fell for, who knew me so well, is now my best friend and I’m so thankful for him.