He was my first best friend. For the purpose of privacy, I’ll call him Red. We would go to each other's houses all the time and play for hours. He was two years older, and always looked after me. Red was like an older brother. I always thought it would stay that way. Then, just like that, we stopped hanging and our friendship ended.

It felt terrible. I considered him a brother, but for some reason it all faded away before I could realize it. I met Red again five year later and he had changed. I was hoping to have a little talk with him and things would naturally go back to how they were. However, when I saw him, I could think of nothing to talk about. It was awkward and weird after all the great time we used to have together.

It was not very long after that I heard the saying “Friends come and go”. It sounded silly and unfair to me. Maybe friends that you don’t spend too much time with, but it didn’t have to be the same with best friends. I decided to never let it happen again. I wanted to find a best friend that would remain my friend forever.

My new best friend was Blue. Blue was a guy I met while I was taking judo classes. From the first moment I talked with him, it was clear he was a funny guy. After judo, our fathers would take us to watch football matches in a restaurant nearby. We ordered drinks, made silly jokes, and would laugh for hours. Sometimes we would have sleepovers, and stay up all night. The games we made up were ridiculous, but we didn’t care. Unfortunately, once again, I could do nothing as I saw it all go away. He moved with his family abroad and I had to say goodbye.

My mother would tell me that this things happened in life. Despite that, it still made no sense to me. Was it that hard to save a friendship? Why did people say it was “powerful”, or “important” if it didn’t even last. It was meant to be bond that you head with few people.

The “Friends come and go” subject was one big loop. I found someone fun to hang out with, but under different circumstances it ended. It kept repeating itself. Slowly, I started to accept it. Yet, it hurt when I thought of all those good times I had had with those people, and how they were far gone. I couldn’t help but wonder if those people remembered them. Did they miss those fun days? Did they even care how things had turned out?

And then there was Green, Green was well…different. He and had absolutely nothing in common, but somehow we became best friends. I guess it was the fact that we both could teach each other different things and kept it interesting. Anyhow, like most others it was time for him to leave. His parents found new jobs and moved away. As he left I felt once again mad. But than he told me:

“Let’s make this last day count.”

I looked at him and smirked.

“Let’s do that!” I replied.

We made the most out of the day. Went to every place where we could have fun. It was the greatest day ever.

Finally, I had realized that I couldn’t force friendship. When it was time to let go, I just had to let go. Will the loop be broken? Who knows? I will accept things as they are, but I will definitely make good memories to remember them with.