“Good night”.

I heard my mom yell to me as I shut the door to my bedroom. But was it really a good night. I said to myself as I layed in my canopy bed shutting the curtains that surrounded me.

I usually like being alone but tonight was different. I felt lost, lonely, and distant from not only people but from myself.

“Who are you”.  “Why can't you be better”.  “You're useless”.

Tears stream down my face as my demons control my thoughts. I need help, but i don't want it. I don't want to feel like a burden to those who have problems of their own. As my heart begins to ache my silent cry becomes a lot louder.

A cry that was a cry from being fed up became a cry for help. A cry for some to comfort me without knowing how I've been feeling. But is that even realistic. I fear being pushed aside and told my problems aren't that major or that I'm overreacting.

Everyone deals with their demons differently. I just don't know how to fight mine. This battle is like a never ending battle. A head for head. A battle I can’t fight on my own. I’m overpowered by negative thoughts trying to control my life. As i fall asleep in this gloomy bed of depression.