Do we ever remember our childhood? Some girls say their fathers are their heroes. To me, my father was nowhere near that for me. When I was a little girl back in my country I was about three years old when my father left my mother and our family. Now when we are little we don’t understand much of what’s happing in our lives. As I grew older my mom knew I was old enough to make my own decisions. I don’t think I remember my father’s voice. I don’t flash back to how I ran up to him when he came home. I never anymore remember how he looked at my mother. I don’t remember where he took me or if he ever took me anywhere. I don’t remember half of my childhood I think no one does. I guess it’s because god because god doesn’t want us to remember the life of it. I don’t remember my old house nor do I flash on how I use to walk to school. Our parents only remind us of the good times in our lives but never the bad ones. That’s probably the main reason I don’t remember my father. But I will always remember what my mom said if you love something set it free if it comes back to you it’s yours

Some girls remember their first love as the one that was the most unbelievable one. But I would always look back at where my heart was ruined forever. It’s the one day that will eternally stick in my heart forever. I will never fail to remember how hard was to move to another although he moved on in a few days. I will never in my life forget how much I drowned myself in tear or how rough it was to notice happy couples and thinking that it will at no time be me. I don’t remember who he was but I know he's the ghost who haunts me forever. But yet never hear him nor do I ever see him yet he comes to me as a dream. The guy who haunts me broke, hurt me and shredded me in half. It was difficult for me to smile no matter how much I wanted to but, throughout my years of growing up, I was able to deal with it when someone broke me in half. Yet the one question that says in my heart is where is the one who will cherish me for me I am and won’t let me down? When I first had my heart sheared in the piece I had nowhere to go I was lonely. I never want to forget how the following day I saw him kiss someone else. I can no longer remember his deep voice nor do I flash on the way he held me close when I was afraid. It’s like a kaleidoscope of memories which all comes back but he never does. Sometimes I think how the devil could be pulling you towards someone who looks so much like an angel when he smiles at you? I don’t remember him being mine I remember him being hers. I think the hard part wasn’t losing him it was losing me. All the dreams I ever had about him or the things I planned I start to regret them now I discovered who he truly isn’t who I wanted. But maybe that was the relationship between the two of us it was just a big fantasy that never existed. I was just chasing after me like a nightmare that what to come to end. His still this appearance that hunts me threw all my relationship wherever I end up with I hear him laughing I see him ruining my love for the one I’m with. I never thought that heartbreak could be so strong so powerful that it would stay in my heart forever. It’s like the memory that never dies. He was the one who made me afraid of the relationship, frightened of love he is the reason I can't any longer have faith in another guy. Could actually something last forever? Could something last for a long time? I never want to forget how much it hurts to see someone you fell so deeply for leave or see them with another. Looking back at the pass I could see how much I suffered for him and how much I wanted to change his thoughts about me but it was a waste of my time. All this time I was wasting, hoping he would come around I’ve been giving out chances every time and all he did is let me down. I still remember the look on his face the words that he whispered to me for just us to know he told me he loved me but yet he disappeared. Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you never met thought out my life I only wish to wake one day and know he's no longer chasing after me. But that day never came his nightmare that chases me hurts me and scares me. Although it’s hard to forget him I no longer know who he is or what power he has to make me suffer.