It all started on March 10, 2010. I was beginning to get scared of my relationship. It was getting too serious, and it was time to run away. That was one thing that I had always been good at, running away. Whenever things would get too serious for me, I’d just leave. I would run away as fast as I could and never look back. Things were different this time. That night I went to go see my ex boyfriend, Aaron. I hadn’t talked to him in several months and I missed what we used to have. So, I went to see him. I remember t perfectly. He had refused to talk to me for several months prior and I was finally sick of it. I was in the lobby of the local Jewish Community Center, hanging out with my friends. He walked in and sat down. As he sat down, he looked up, the light was shining behind me and it made it hard for him to see me. With his hand shading his face, he looked towards me, “who is that” he asked. I simply looked down at him and said, “Marisa”. Then, I walked away; I knew what this would do. He reached for me as I turned around and headed towards the stairs. I stopped at the foot of the stairs and began talking to my friends. Suddenly, I felt a tap on my shoulder. Aaron stood behind me, motioning for me to come talked to him.

We talked for about ten minutes. He asked me about my life and my relationship. I told him I was still with Michael and how much I loved him. But, I also told him how I felt trapped and how I felt like Michael didn’t love me anymore. It was a lie, but I knew how to work my way into Aaron’s head. Aaron told me that he still had feelings for me and that if I broke up with Michael, he’d be there. Then, as if we were living in a movie, Aaron reached for my face and pulled me into a kiss. That night, I came home and called Michael, I told him that I couldn’t be with him anymore. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I had done this so many times with so many other guys and it was never this hard. I should’ve realized then that it would be the biggest mistake of my life.

The next week, I had recovered a bit, I went back to go see Aaron. I was expecting him to make me his girlfriend that night. But, my hopes were crushed when he told me that his parents wouldn’t let him date me again. I spent the whole night sulking. Finally, he noticed how upset I was and he told me that we could be together. That same night, around eleven, he called me and told me that it wasn’t possible and he didn’t want to go against his parents. I was crushed, but determined to make him mine. So the next week I tried again. However, he never showed up so my plan fell through. The week after he played me one more time making me his and then two days later telling me that he really couldn’t do it.

Finally, on April 7, 2010. I walked into the Jewish Community Center and saw Aaron waiting for me; he approached me and pulled me into an amazing hug. He was wearing a brilliantly red, plaid shirt. He always looked amazing in plaid. He told me that he wanted to ditch everyone, with me, and go across the street to the park. Being the foolish, love-drunk girl that I was, I agreed to go. We weren’t at the park for more than five minutes before he tried making a move on me. “If we hook up right now, I’ll be your boyfriend for good this time,” he whispered in my ear. With that said, I believed him. However, at the last second I decided to chicken out. Then, Aaron said something I will never forget, “How do I know you won’t cheat on me if you won’t follow through with a simple deal you made”. In that moment it sounded completely logically, but now looking back, I should’ve just said no. So, I believed him and went through with it. Guess what? The next day, he broke up with me again. The only difference was, this time I was fed up and simply said, “I’m gone for good this time”. The day after that I went to go see Michael; I was still in love with him. I should’ve never done anything with either of them. However, I did the same thing with Michael that I did with Aaron. My fifteen-year old mind never thought of the consequences that this could have on my life.

Eventually, Michael found out about what had gone down with Aaron and never forgave me. The moment he found out, he told me to never talk to him again. He told me he hated me and that I was, “Broken beyond repair”. I will never forget those words and I will never forgive myself for what I did. Everyone has a story and this is mine.