Ed Wood. Hollywood will never admit it, but you were the best of us filmmakers. Despite the notoriety you received as the ‘worst filmmaker’ who ever lived, you were just happy to make entertainment! If your movies were truly despicable, then I must be crazy for coming back to watch them again and again. With your infamous works, your vision just never made contact with the viewers–– an error that cost you a career in filmmaking. I write to you because I hope to achieve the same goal you had; I want to become an artist who may not be the best, but at least creates something memorable.

Like you, I am a one-man army of storytelling and movie-making. I have some talent in the business, but I lack the love and enthusiasm for my work that you never let go for yours. My art, stop-motion animation, involves spending hours bent over a table of lego pieces and capturing footage one subtle movement at a time. In that meticulous process, a minute of animation could take a night’s worth of sleep to film. By the end of one recording session, I would be awake up to that hour when venting at my plastic colleagues seemed perfectly fine. When I make a film, I’m you, Ed Wood: an attentive maniac with a need to fill every frame with my vision.

My vision is one of a better world, where cosmopolitan acceptance, resolution to century-old conflicts, and ventures into the unknown aren’t the fiction of a naive mind. I want to present that vision by a means so unique that it couldn’t be ignored. If it takes an entire night to get the scene to present my ideas the way I want it to, then I’ll commit.

When I upload the completed movie on YouTube, I’d imagine that the online community would acknowledge the ambition behind my video, maybe draw inspiration from it, and possibly pass my ideas on. One of my first uploads tackled stereotypes with a satirical message about their alienating effect on ethnic groups; however, the recognition has yet to materialize.

I had hoped that after six videos, my 12 loyal subscribers or other passersby would discuss some of the themes I dedicated nights to present to them. I had hope that someone would see how ideologies could conflict in my abstract skit about a nihilistic office worker; that someone would question how moral criminal vendettas were in my hitman epic; that someone would see through the comedy veil of my satire about the police state.

Unfortunately, valuable comments were sparse; only one kind commenter had bothered to declare, “This is a really interesting topic.” By the seventh, I was starting to doubt my own ability to make a difference with my art, hitting walls when new ideas came to me. For a time, I imposed a hiatus on and lost interest in filmmaking. If you were still alive, I would have rapped on your door just to seek your advice: not on the production process but on the mindset of an artist who never gives up.

Your plots may have been predictable, but your attitude, the ever-lasting enthusiasm and resilience, is the greatest mystery to me. How can an entertainer continue making films after receiving such harsh criticism from the audience? Was it because you were fearless? Likely, you were prone to criticism like any other filmmaker–– myself included. But judging by your sheer persistence to get your creations on the big screen, the words of critics probably did little to deter you. What was it then? Was it because you just loved what you did that much?

Maybe you loved your creations too much and missed the obvious blunders. However, your films resonated with such enthusiasm and euphoria that I could clearly tell how much you loved what you did. They are crafted by your passion and your relentless pursuit for making entertainment! That is the reason why you are the best of us. You loved moviemaking no matter how bad your works in the industry turned out. Most filmmakers would drop off the face of Hollywood if their hard work was shunned and laughed at; but with undiminished or even heightened spirit, you got cracking on your next movie!

With that kind of mindset, I could breathe life into idle ideas on my head and share my vision with audiences everywhere–– all without the crippling fear of criticism! Whether the final product wins Oscars or Golden Raspberries, everyone would know that I loved every second of what I did. Hopefully, in 2015, I will be able to pump out a movie or two and view them with the same pride and love you viewed your own.

I know you will not mind my quips about your critically ridiculed films, for you will always see them as masterpieces anyways.

Best wishes, Philip.