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Here Comes The Sun
Summer
I am so happy, so carefree. I laugh and love. The sun is bright and positive. It coats my skin with a layer of bronze. All my friends are around me. This time is perfect. There are no deadlines, no stressors, just fun times I will remember forever. Blast up the music and get me some sunscreen! (Can't help having Irish blood!)
Fall
Things are still pretty great. I've made a lot of good friends this school year. I get a little stressed out sometimes, but that's just part of Honors Kid Life. Sometimes I get really tired, but I'm able to motivate myself to get out of bed and go to school. I don't quite need the special bright light yet, but I probably will by November. I hope I don't hit that low like last year. I shudder just thinking about it.
Winter
God. I hate my life. I just want to stay home and sleep. School is sooo hard. Why do I need chemistry? Or geometry? I don't even care about anything anymore. Screw it. I'm so done. I hate everyone and everything. I should just kill myself. I'm fat and ugly and useless and going nowhere. Freaking winter. I don't understand it. I miss the sun.
Spring
Things are so much better now. It's spring, beautiful spring! There are little teeny crocuses. They're so adorable. This is always my favorite season. It's such a lovely relief to get out of winter. I'm so happy. I care a lot more about school, and suddenly it doesn't seem so hard. Winter always puts me in a fog. And now, I am free.
What you see here is the typical year for somebody with SAD, or seasonal affective disorder. Seasonal affective disorder is a mental disorder that makes a person feel depressed during the winter months because of a lack of sunlight. People who have the disease can have normal mental health during the rest of the year, as seen in the summer and spring segments.Technically, it is not a unique mood disorder, but to me it is.
Symptoms of the disorder include wanting to sleep a lot, craving carby foods, depressed feelings, difficulty waking up, and morning sickness. People may also withdraw from social activities and have problems completing tasks. This all leads to depression and pessimistic feelings, seen in the winter segment of the diary.
You may wonder why this happens. Moods can depend on amount of light. For example, often in writing, a gloomy setting such as darkness or a thunderstorm can indicate sadness, while a bright happy setting like a summer day can express good feelings. People who live in areas such as Finland or Alaska are more likely to have the disease due to the shorter days and lower light levels. However, people in California or something are much less likely to have the disorder because of the longer days and higher levels of light.
Treatment options include light therapy and medication. Light therapy is when the person with the disorder sits in front a very bright light (not looking directly into the light, but reading or doing work near it). The vitamin D and brightness of the light makes the body think it's sunny outside. That's what I was talking about in the fall segment of the SAD diary. Medications include anti-depressants and carefully timed melatonin.
The question is...why do I care about this so much? I have it.
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