The Runaway

Day 1: It’s tough leaving everything behind. I lay awake in the quiet night. All I can hear around me is the chirp of bugs in a nearby field. The breeze brushes over me. I try to sleep, but the nightmares are too bad. I don’t know why I did it. Now I have nothing. My family is gone. I did it. I don’t know why. The voices in my head got too real. They started quiet in the beginning, but as time went on they got louder and more aggressive. They made me do it. I’m a wanted man, alone with my thoughts. Should I just turn myself in?

Day 2: I miss my kids. I can remember hugging them and kissing them before school and when I got home from work. I can still hear their footsteps thumping as fast as lightning on the wood floors of our classic white picket fence house. I love them so much. I’m so sorry for what I did. I can’t go on living like this. I scrap for food, I’m so hungry. I can’t do it. It feels like an eternity since I got to hold my wife and kids in my arms. The places I stay are awful. I have to keep my cover so I go to abandoned buildings. If they’re locked, I break in. They all have the same musty smell as if I’m in an old concrete basement. And it’s always freezing and night- guess i should’ve thought about blankets.

Day 3: I can’t access more money or they’ll find me. They can track my card. I can’t risk being found. They don’t understand. They don’t know. I don’t want to be locked up for the rest of my life. I can’t be locked up. I just can’t. It wasn’t my fault. I swear. It was the voices. Nobody understands. No one. My mind and body is going crazy. I’m not myself. I can’t get rid of the shaking. My hands are never still. My body can never calm down.It’s getting harder and harder everyday. Can I even pull through this? I need help.