Chapter One

-The First Letter-

Hello. I’m Q&M. That’s not my real name of course, but you don’t need to know my real one either. I had a normal; Let me rephrase that, Perfect life. I was an only child. I was sparsely punished. I had lots of good friends. I was popular. I had nice looks, I was 14, that age where your making mistakes, but no one cares for two reasons. 1, Everyone else was making mistakes, too. And 2, people still thought you were immature. My parents where the gullible type. They cared but just didn’t know. And when they found out, if it was already finished, they wouldn’t care, and if it was in the process of happening, they’d let you finish. I could get away with murder. And to top that, in my parent's eyes, I was the perfect child. I used this once and a while, but never too often. Until all this started.

***

It had been a good day. Everything seemed to be going right. I had gotten a good grade in my least favourite subject, I hadn been late to any classes, and no one had noticed that I didn water the school petunia. Lunch had been good, I gotten through my last two hours without skipping a beat and I was on my way home. I wish I would have just turned around. Noticed I forgotten my ink pen or wanted to check in on the school petunias to make sure they hadn't died or something, anything to stop me from going home that very moment. I approach the mailbox like I always do, grabbing up all the unimportant letters that were advertising something or another. I walked on inside like it was any other day, because at that very moment it was. Looking back I wish I could stop time right there. Savor the last taste of innocence I had before I witnessed the worst thing I could ever imagine. My mom, my only family, was lying face down in a pool of crimson next to the table in the foyer. In that same crimson, written all over the walls were the words: 

Read it

Read it

Read it 

Read it

Read it

Read it 

Read it

With shaking hands, I start to flip through the envelopes in my hand. Electric company, Water company, Supermarket sales....... The end of ***** *******. The truth in those words would only become more and more apparent when the letter inside was revealed.

Dear ***** *******,

You see her, right? Sorry, but I didn’t know what better way there was to get your attention. My name is C.W. and I have a lot of questions for you, but they can wait. First, I have to make sure that you are willing to answer truthfully. Meet me at the tree behind your school at 9:00 sharp.

P.S: Do not be late.

9:00 sharp. That was in... 3 minutes! Okay, now I had admittedly gone to the party on tenth street before heading home, but that wasn’t important. The important thing was that I needed to move. I pull my shoes back on and start bolting. I live about three blocks from the school, so it should only take me two minutes if I run. I run and run so fast and hard that I think I might pass out. But I finally reach the school. I walk around the corner and... Rin, my best friend ever, all tied up and standing on a latter. A nose hangs from the nearest branch, loosely lying on his chest and the back of his neck. He looks at me in a look of terror.`

“Good, your here.” A soft voice says. A second figure, dressed in all black climbs up the latter next to him. The figure is wearing a doctors mask and a ski cap on their head, but tufts of orange hair stick out from under the hat. Their wearing a black hoodie, and I can assume that their a guy because their chest and hips are flat. The only thing other than the orange hair, the only thing that stands out is his blue eyes that were so blue that they looked like the ocean water in the summer. Even though I’m terrified, his eyes make me smile just a bit. “I’m really sorry I had to meet you under these circumstances *****-senpai, but I’m still so happy that I got to meet you! Oh, yeah, by the way, if you say no he dies. I’m really sorry that, but I need to know that you won’t be lying to me. This is really just a precaution. I know you’d never lie to me senpai. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyhoooooo... I don’t need you to do much, just a bit of a... favor per se. See there’s been someone at the school you go to that’s been keeping us from starting the game for real. I just need you to kill him for me, then we can start this game. You may not tell anyone about me or tonight, and you obviously can’t get caught. His name is Kazumi Akiyama and he’ll be at the tenth street party tomorrow.” C.W.gets off the latter and begins to untie Rin. As soon as he’s down, he runs for his life, not that I blame him. C.W. walks up to me. He puts his left hand on my cheek. “I know you’ll be a good girl senpai.” And with that he runs off. I slump down to the ground. Why is this... Oh. This was because of that. Well I didn’t know how he knew, but I didn’t blame him. I’d hate me too if I knew what I did. I get up and walk home. My mom’s still lying in her own dried blood. I smile at her, but I don’t stop. I go to the kitchen and make some steaming hot cup of hot cocoa. I don’t drink it, I just take it up to my room. Now, as C.W. mentioned, I have a few secrets of my own. I pour the hot cocoa all over the top of the floorboard near my bed. The false board melts away under the heat of the cocoa. Three items sit just under the floorboard. A diary, a family heirloom and a complete student roster with a few people’s names crossed out and some circled. I lift all the items from under the floorboard and put them on my bed. I lift the false bottom, and there lies the item I’d been looking for all along. A silver dagger with a golden hilt. I lift it up and examine it. I hadn’t been used since the third grade, so it was a bit dull, but not unuseable. I take out the sharpener from under my bed. I sharpen my knife all night, all the way until the sun starts to come up. I suddenly realize that it’s 5:30, and school starts at 6:00. I rush into the bathroom. My hair sits in knots on my head, so I just throw it into a messy bun. My face is paler than I’ve seen it in a while and there were dark circles under my eyes, but there was nothing much I could do about that. I turn on my heel and leave the room. Today was the day I kill someone. When I arrive at school, I have to stop and smile about how utterly normal people are acting. For them, it’s just another day. I walk into my homeroom to see a substitute. I really couldn’t have cared less about what he said, but I too notes anyway to keep my mind occupied. I do the same for most of my classes, but then I come to 5th hour science. Our lesson is about hydrogen peroxide and fingerprints. Man I have never been more happy to be learning forensics. 

“Okay class, now we all know that hydrogen peroxide is made of two hydrogen atoms and two oygen atoms, but why does it clean blood so well? Hemoglobin,” She turns around and spells on the board “also spelled haemoglobin,”She turns around and spells that too “iron-containing protein in the blood of many animals—in the red blood cells (erythrocytes) of vertebrates—that transports oxygen to the tissues. Hemoglobin forms an unstable, reversible bond with oxygen; in the oxygenated state it is called oxyhemoglobin and is bright red; in the reduced state it is purplish blue. Hemoglobin develops in cells in the bone marrow that become red blood cells. When red cells die, hemoglobin is broken up: iron is salvaged, transported to the bone marrow by proteins called transferrins, and used again in the production of new red blood cells; the remainder of the hemoglobin forms the basis of bilirubin, a chemical that is excreted into the bile and gives the feces their characteristic yellow-brown colour. Each hemoglobin molecule is made up of four heme groups surrounding a globin group, forming a tetrahedral structure. Heme, which accounts for only 4 percent of the weight of the molecule, is composed of a ringlike organic compound known as a porphyrin to which an iron atom is attached. It is the iron atom that binds oxygen as the blood travels between the lungs and the tissues. There are four iron atoms in each molecule of hemoglobin, which accordingly can bind four atoms of oxygen. Globin consists of two linked pairs of polypeptide chains. Hydrogen peroxide is a chemical compound with the formula H2O2. In its pure form, it is a very pale blue,[5] clear liquid, slightly more viscous than water. Hydrogen peroxide is the simplest peroxide (a compound with an oxygen–oxygen single bond). It is used as an oxidizer, bleaching agent, and antiseptic. Because is Hydrogen peroxide so good at bleaching things, it removes all traces of blood ever being there. Anyway, onto the next part of my lesson. A fingerprint is an impression left by the friction ridges of a human finger. The recovery of partial fingerprints from a crime scene is an important method of forensic science. Moisture and grease on a finger result in fingerprints on surfaces such as glass or metal. Deliberate impressions of entire fingerprints can be obtained by ink or other substances transferred from the peaks of friction ridges on the skin to a smooth surface such as paper. Fingerprint records normally contain impressions from the pad on the last joint of fingers and thumbs, though fingerprint cards also typically record portions of lower joint areas of the fingers.Human fingerprints are detailed, nearly unique, difficult to alter, and durable over the life of an individual, making them suitable as long-term markers of human identity. They may be employed by police or other authorities to identify individuals who wish to conceal their identity, or to identify people who are incapacitated or deceased and thus unable to identify themselves, as in the aftermath of a natural disaster. Okay, open your books to page 201 and...” Okay, I admittedly zoned out after that. I cruised through the rest of 5th hour and 6th with nothing but the 10th street party on my mind. As soon as the last bell rings, I leap out of my seat, causing it to screech loudly across the floor. I pay no attention to this, even though the teacher yells for me to come back and push my chair in. I whizz through the halls and arrive at my locker before most of the students even leave their classroom. I hastily stuff my books in my bag and pull out the knife, stuffing it in a pale yellow bag the exact same color as the floor. I rush out to the exit. Just before I get to the metal detector that my school installed last year days after a shooting scare, I pretend to drop my bag. I pick up my bag but leave the yellow bag on the floor just before the table were you put your earrings, watches, metal necklaces, and anything else you might have on you that was made of metal. Before I walk through the metal detector, I indiscreetly kick it to the other end of the table. I smile when the alarm doesn’t go off, and pick up my bag along with a piece of litter. I throw the litter in the bin and start on my way to the tenth street party. When I get there, the only people there are a few of the bicycle riding kids and among them, (I can assume) the host. I go and sit in the corner, looking at the ground with my bag in hand. I wasn’t in the slightest nervous, more happy that C.W. hadn’t shown up yet. I know he’ll be here, if for no other reason than to oversee that I do a good job. I take out his picture that I cut out from the roster. It says he’s tall with brown hair and brown eyes. He was one of the most plain people I’d ever seen. He wasn’t special at all. I space out for a while, two or three minutes at most. I look around. The room is filled with people. I don’t understand how I didn’t realize the music turning on. People are dancing and drinking bitter liquids out of solo cups. I scan the room. I don’t see Akiyama anywhere. I get up and start to make my way across the room of dancing people. My mom always used to say, “Only when things are going great, can things go very wrong.” I think she was right. Red wine all over my clothes, which just so happened to be red. 

“Excuse me!” I say to the figure who’d, when dancing quite wildly, thrown wine over their shoulder. 

“Oh my gosh I am so sorry can I help you?” Says... Akiyama! I try to hide my surprize, and say:

“I-if you could get me a napkin that’d be great.” Akiyama rushes off to where they keep the drinks and grabs like fifty napkins.

“Oh my gosh I think I ruined it. Can I make it up to you?” Oh, Perfect opportunity.

“Well, you could drive me home so that I can change.”

“Oh of course, you live at *******,**** right?”

“Um... yeah.”

“Oh, sorry that probably sounded super creepy…” He scratches the back of his neck sheepishly. “I walk home the same way as you. I only know that by chance I swear!”

“I don’t really mind. Let’s get going.”

“S-sure.” If I weren't in this situation, I’d never let him drive me home. But, I do think I understand why Akiyama was C.W.’s target. Dang, this all just got a little more messed up. I wasn’t just going to break his heart, I was going to take it. I zone out on the way to the car. I can’t believe this is happening. His car was nice, and I could only assume that his parents were loaded. 

“Here we are.” I nod and get in the passenger side. This isn’t happening. This isn’t happening. This can’t be- but the cold dagger in my pocket was proof that this is happening. We arrive.

“Sh-should I come in or stay out-”

“Oh come in please. I’m making you do me a favor. It’s the least I could do.” We walk up to the door. I smile. 

“Please don’t be afraid, for nothing is as it seems.” I swing the door open and drag him inside by his arm. He screams at the state of my mom in the foyer. I take the cold-hilted knife out of my pocket.

“I really don’t mean it, and I’m sorry.” I face him with my long black hair wafting around me like a cape. I allow a single tear fall down my cheek. I smile. “I truly mean it, I swear.” I take to knife and hold it over his chest, not letting the blade peirce him. “I hope you go to heaven.” I drive the knife into his chest. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. 

I pick him up along with my mom and slowly bring them to the attic. I start to realize how sickly ironic it is. My attic has a table and chairs near the window, a picnic blanket on the left, a couch on the right, and other furniture in other places. I put them in the chair near the window. I make sure that their eyes are closed and that their smiling. I wish I could do more for them, but as I close my mother’s hand around an extremely realistic fake rose, I’d like to think she knows I’m doing the best I can. As I leave the attic, I realize that it was pretty likely that I had another note in my mailbox.

Sure enough, there is. It’s addressed to senpai and although I wasn’t too fond of this new nickname, I knew it was for me. I opened it up without the slightest feeling of dread, knowing that there wouldn’t be any type of blackmail or threat in this one.

Dear Senpai,

You did so well! I’m especially glad that you took the time to (I hope) do well to the corpses of your mum and that Kazumi kid. I’d like you to meet me, same place as last time, and tell me all about it.

 Love you senpai-

     C.W.

It would be rude to meet him in a stained shirt, so I go upstairs and change. I look through my dresser, looking for something I think he might like. I find a red tube top and white jacket. I throw them on over a fresh pair of jeans and head out the   door. I feel surprisingly calm, I mean... I just killed a person, shouldn’t I be freaking out? Anyway, I arrive at the tree (which has started to bloom light pink blossom) in no time. This time, C.W. wasn’t dressed up all black. This time he wore a red dress shirt with a black jacket and a tie that wasn’t tied.He still wore a mask to conceal his identity, but it was a white one that made his skin look less pale. He actually looked... Nice. Wait, I wasn’t meant to think that! He was forcing me to kill people. I was meant to be afraid. But... in the span of only a few hours, I feel a bit better, making me feel a bit worse. I was falling down the rabbit hole willingly and the white rabbit wasn’t going to save me this time. And somehow, Alice was falling for the queen and the white rabbit had died long ago. People tried to change but it never worked. Nonsense and madness consumed them. The only difference between them and me was that I could lie to myself and say that I had the feeling to be sane. That I had the better sense to be okay. Ignore the ugly truth and embrace that beautiful lie. I could smile and they couldn’t. I was better, I was. But... I mean... I still just killed someone and in my mind admitted that the one that made me was looking really good. 

“Oh senpai! I’m so glad you’re here! I do love your attention to detail with your mom and that Kazumi kid. What exactly did you do to them?” 

“I... I set them in the chair next to the window. I made them smile... they looked happy, happier than I ever saw them alive.” 

“Good, that is the very purpose of arrangement after death. Although, I do think it will be very difficult to achieve that goal with you senpai.” I only smile at the remark. I want so badly to halt everything and cry, cry and hope that something magically changed, but no. If I was going to get through this alive, I needed to just deal with the punches. I laughed a bit and said,

“Well let’s hope we don’t have to worry about that for a long time.”

“Oh of course not, the sooner that comes, that sooner the game ends! Speaking of this game we are to play, let’s get started, shall we? So, we’re going to play a little game of blackjack, but only for today. It will change every time you see me. If you win, I’ll have to do something for you, anything you want. If I win, I will give you a list of hints to the person you have to kill. It will always be someone at the 10th street party, and I promise that I will never put you in an impossible situation. If you kill the wrong person, or as someone else for help in finding out who it is, you will have to come back you my home with me when I decide our game is done. How does that sound?” For a minute, I am shocked, but I was already deep into this so I guess it wasn’t that crazy.

“That sounds great Kōhai!” C.W. eyes light up like a little kid. His cheeks go up and I can assume he’s smiling under his mask.

“No ones ever called me Kōhai before!” He takes a deep breath and regroups himself. “Alright, let’s play blackjack then!” C.W. takes out a deck of cards and shuffles them mid air. One moment in his right hand, then flying through the air to the left like the cards owned the sky. None of the card fell, not even one, as they dances methodically through the air, thinner than life. We sat in the grass, the breeze wifting at our reality, changing it ever so slightly. The winter that I tended to imagine in my mind changed to spring in that grass, thinking of tomorrow's eve. But no. This wasn’t the time to get all happy-jolly. I had to win this, I had to. My hand was... a queen and an eight. It was risky. I could say hit me, and hope for an ace or a two or three, or I could hope that he’d bust and stand... I-I was going to do this, I was going to do it right. 

“Hit me.”

My words sounded crystal clear, and I bet he could see right through me. But he still gave me another card. A two! I got a two, which meant I had a twenty points. 

“I’ll stand.”

“So will I.” He took another card without even looking at it. He closes his eyes, turned them both over and... A queen, a ten and an ace. He had twenty-one. I Lost. I was going to have to have to kill someone again. This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... This can’t be happening... But it was. I had lost and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. Not a thing. I had to do it, because I value my life, yeah that’s it. I’m not selfish I’m not. I just need to survive so that I could save people later. Yeah that’s it. C.W. hands me a note.
“Good luck.” He walks away, leaving me unable to hide my shock and despair. The note held a picture, a lock of hair, and a vile of spit. Pft... Don’t underestimate a forensic major enlistee. I already knew that I had a dna testing kit at home. This was going to be a piece of cake. Oh my gosh, how could I be thinking this? Killing someone, a human being, was going to be a piece of cake? Well, I mean it was... Ugh, I should just go home and get the dna test started. I walk home and to my surprise there was a box sitting on my doorstep. On the top of the box, a note had been glued on.

Dear senpai,

I don’t want you to get lonely without your mom around, so I got you Hiro!

Love,

C.W.

I open the box and... An orange tabby cat! Okay, this might not sound like a big deal, but I love cats! And Hiro, that was just the cutest name! He spelled it 浩, meaning prosperous, which was super sweet and deep. Beautiful autumn. That’s what that Akiyama kidś name meant. A aburiru, Forlorn April. My mom’s name couldn be more fitting. In the worst possible April, she had died. It made her young again, so to say. I’d like to think that she saw her life flash before her eyes, and all she saw was April. A good April. Every April but today’s. Anyhoo, the cat was such a kind gesture! I take Hiro inside and fill a small bowl with tuna from the back of the canned foods cupboard. (and yes, we did have a specific cupboard for that.) I go up the stairs, just to find another note on my desk. 

Dear senpai,

I’ll be nice this time and let you have your science kit, but next round you’ll have to work a little harder.

Love,

C.W.

Eh, whatever. I’ll worry about that later. For now I can still start getting a dna result on the hair I got. I slipped it into a vile so that I could put it in the spinning machine that was going to do all my work for me. I guess I should consider this a luxury from now on. But this, this was going to be my non-resolve. Next time, I won’t settle for a score of 20. I wouldn’t stop until I got a score of 21, and I wasn’t talking just about black jack. But... somehow I couldn’t be mad at C.W. for it. I don’t think he meant to ruin anything. I just think that he’d never learned anything better than that. It was almost peaceful to be able to think these things without a biased opinion watching my every move, reading my every thought. I... liked the freedom that had come to me, the freedom that had come from killing. I hated to admit it, but it was true. But we were all just ticking time bombs, even me and C.W. It was only a matter of time until we both went exploding into the night sky, ramparts of the same will, nothing more than a shooting star. Nothing, nothing to anyone real.

Chapter 2

-The First Witness-

I couldn’t sleep through the wirr of the machine spinning round and round, so I just stayed up watching the movie in my mind stuck on replay. I smile, they frown, and that’s just the way it was meant to be. I didn’t mean to cause them harm, I mean it. I really wish this wasn’t the way it was meant to be. There was no way this was right, but then why does it feel so right? People who killed people were inherently bad, right? It was common sense. But C.W. didn’t seem bad, he actually seemed nice. But that couldn’t be right, no. I couldn’t be falling for a murderer. Heck, I was falling for someone I knew almost nothing about. This was madness! But... Maybe madness wasn’t that bad. The dictionary made it sound bad, and so did mankind, but maybe people had the wrong definition. Madness seemed to dwell within every person, only coming out at certain times. What if people aren't inherently bad, but inherently mad? Not like it really mattered, look at me. I was blank eyed and non-remorseful after doing something that would surely change my life forever. I bet if you were to look at me, you would think I was made out of glass. With my eyes glossed over as if I was dead but somehow still alive, awake but somehow sleeping. But... Somehow I still couldn’t stop myself from thinking about C.W. There was just something about him that felt familiar, safe. Tch, I say that the man that is making me murder people makes me feel safe. Gosh, what was I doing, Heck what was I thinking. But... Somehow it seemed right. I could help but notice that there was something I wanted or needed that he had. Something I couldn’t live without. But I couldn’t quite place my finger on it. The only thing that I could say for sure, there was something more I needed before I truly felt at ease with what was happening. I stood up and got out of bed. There was nothing I could do to stop replaying the scene of me and Akiyama, so I just went downstairs and watch an actual movie. I turned on some movie about a girl having to move to a new country, blah blah blah, sappy stuff the end. It was the most generic movie in the history of movies. But I felt a lot better afterwards, and I even learned something. If you can’t deal with a problem, deal with the way you feel about it. And right now, I felt like a wanted to die. I went upstairs, thinking that at the very least I could try. To my knowledge, C.W. couldn’t read my mind, but he could see me. I’ll die, I will. I walked up the stairs and, thinking that this was it, bite my thumb and wrote in the wall:

Goodbye

They were lousy last words, but that was okay. They were last word, so they were good enough. I walked up the stairs and took out the last item I truly cared about in my room. A noose. I went to the doorway to the closet, near the window looking out onto the street. When people looked in, they’d see the outline of a broken girl. I ties the rope to the bean tightly holding my breaking door frame up. I got my little wooden stool and stood there looking out at the moon. Nothing could be said there. No one could really think that I was a good person. It was just what it was. I let the chair wobble and just as I’m about to let the chair fall, my window shatter. I’m pulled to the ground quicker than a lightning bolt. I close my eyes, letting disappointment wash over me. When I open them, C.W. is laying on me,  holding my hands down by my head. He’s crying, which is making his mask wet.

“W-why would you senpai... ?” He stops holding my arms down and starts crying on my chest. It was a really good feeling, having someone rely on you so much. I felt like I was holding my own world up for once. He stopped crying after a while, and sat up, but didn’t get off me. He helped me up so that we were kneeling in front of each other. He held his pinky out, prompting me to take hold of it with my pinky. “Promise me that you’ll never do that again.” I took his finger gingerly, suddenly feeling in a calm relaxed mood. He smiled at me and those crystal eyes of his lit up like the night sky. I couldn’t take it anymore. I pulled him closer to me.

“S-senpai...?” I pulled his face closer to mine. He pulled down his mask a little. “What are you-” I ripped off his mask and brought my lips to his. It filled me with this sweet sensation. It took over me, making me feel like I was bleeding out from every pore of my being, but it didn’t hurt. It was good... Really good. rorrim derouloc ylesrevni na hguorht gnikool ekil saw tI. Good and bad all in one. This feeling wasn’t meant to feel so right, but it did. I Let myself get completely submerged in this ever so right-wrong-ish feeling. If I made it out alive, I’d never regret this moment. It was the moment that the one truth I still owned, still could call mine, came crashing down. 腐敗して人を傷つけるのは、他人に腐敗と痛みを引き起こすだけです。I could change that, hold true a new, more pure value. A vow. 私は真実を学び続け、自分自身を保つためにそれを変え続けています。私は他人や自分から何を得る必要があるかに関係なく、自分の価値観に従います。Just a simple truth. I swear it. And that’s that. When we separated, I knew that things had just escalated. I didn’t know if it was a good or bad thing, but it would definitely change the way my life plays out.

“I love you Kōhai.” His eyes lit up just like before. I wanted to save that, to jar it up and keep it on a shelf. But that wasn’t the was it works. I knew were that light came from. It wasn’t a good life, but I knew how it felt. It felt so good. I had no idea why all of this was happening to me, but at this moment, I became sure that this was an absolute good event in my life. C.W. started blushing.

“I-I love you too senpai.” He smiled sheepishly. He pulled his mask back on. “I guess there doesn’t seem like much of a logical reason that you can see for me to still wear this, but as you said, nothing is as it seems.” His cheek bones elevated and I could tell he was smiling. I enjoyed the remark. Having what I said previously referenced was like my life holding itself up, on its own for once. I couldn’t say it was a good feeling, but it was interesting. I couldn’t help but wonder, Was there something I’m missing? I started to feel something, something I’d never felt before. Tristis caritate. A phrase my english teacher used to describe the character Ed in the messenger. Ed was a character that had to take out life staking missions to better the greater good. The only catch is that the last two missions have to do with his family and friends. He had been in love with his best friend for years, but he has to put this aside so that he can help her through her sadness and complete the mission. It was a very good book and described what I felt in that moment perfectly. Tristis caritate. There’s a buzzing noise from  the next room. “And that’s my cue to leave.” C.W. got up and left through the window. I was left with a slight sense of longing, a need for something more. I got up and left to the next room. I checked the ID displayed on the screen of the machine. Oh yeah, this was going to be the easiest elimination of all time. Wait, did I just celebrate to find out I was killing a student? Oh god. But, to be honest, I couldn’t deny the sense of happiness I felt when I saw that name. Sesshomaru Nakamura. A name literally meaning destruction of life, and it summed her up pretty accurately. She was ever quickly self destructing, like someone had brought her up just to detonate her. This would be easy. The next day at school, I didn’t go to class 2-C in the Chūkyū wing. Instead I went to class 2-A in the Tensai wing. The Tensai wing was were all the smart kids went. But not just the smart kids. Tensai wing was specially designed for kids with genius level IQ. There were interactable, completely program customizable diagrams. A library fit for the president and, for kids like Nakamura, a completely soundproof panic room as well as an infirmary equipt with bags upon bags of every type of blood imaginable. Students in this hall have been especially well known for having injuries were the biggest concern was blood loss. Everyone pretended not to know about it, making sure not to make eye contact with any of the kids from that wing. That made things worse. One day, people started to ignore them so much that some kid named Ikari lashed out. Hospitalized the kid with three broken ribs and a cracked skull. Needless to say, they got their own entrence from then on.