You humans are lucky; truly blessed beings that you aren’t like me- Ajabu Na Tofauti. Even on the outside I’m seen as a strange occurrence. My pretty self over here is dark skinned, with light brown and curly- not kinky- hair, and a toned hourglass figure. The only ones taller than me in school are the toothpick kids, and of course some adults. It seems as if no one has ever seen anyone like me.

Of course no one has, I’m one of a kind.

Anyways, you are lucky because your emotions relatively stay in your body. Of course you have the occasional tear of joy or sorrow, sweating, or yelling your victories to the multiverse. In contrast, consider that one time when I was a young, silly-face-making girlie playing with my friends and food in a restaurant. I laughed so hard I started crying. But I only kept going, until I was on the floor trying to inhale (you can imagine the embarrassment my parents must’ve felt at this point). A few moments later, as I inhaled as hard as I could, my chest exploded! My ribs pivoted as if double doors to my unnaturally large and exposed diaphragm.

That was when I first noticed my strangeness.

Another example is when my mother attempted to make me eat the snack food of the devil...olives. Ugg, don’t even make me think about those mini demon eggs. Anyways, I was so disgusted by their presence to the point of nausea. But not just any normal nausea that’s fixed by distracting yourself. Nah, I was throwing up some green liquid for 5 hours straight. No one knew what that stuff was or how I was able to regurgitate an amount I could never fully consume. At least it wasn’t as bad as olives.

Before we continue, let me just say that if you honestly enjoy eating olives, you must be some kind of makaziyao. Or at least completely tasteless and senseless. But anyways…

In middle school, my long time boy crush came up to speak to me one time. I don’t even remember what he was saying; the sweat covered my face, along with lightheadedness, dizziness, and I probably fainted.  All I know is that, once I regained consciousness, my muscles were no longer tense; I was a melted puddle on the floor. Literally, even my uniform clothes liquified as a result of my extreme muscle contractions (basically the end of my love life).

But that was back then.

After my days of immaturity, I was usually bored. I’m not a fan of looking like a zombie that stalks the fake lives of others. And school work has just become too easy for me. But I try to keep myself entertained. Otherwise, I rest my head on my posing hand and exhale lethargically, causing my body to slump down into a thick sludge.

Can you just imagine how I might be trying to recover from each of these things?

During summer vacation before my senior year, I was hanging out more with my friends, developing my hobbies, and enjoying my unbeknownst excitement for the future. Looking out at the sunset as it stained the pristine sea with its blood while also shining a golden path leading to our great Star, I was at peace. I laid back, exhaled, and smiled at the wonderful handicraft. It was such a relaxing ecstasy that I felt like losing the effect of gravity upon me and transcend. And through the magical transformation of my body into clouds, I almost did just that.

I probably should have allowed myself to fly. Eh, too late now.

Returning to school, I met up with my nerd friend Elik. He came over talking about some interesting Biblical connections and stuff. Once I actually deciphered the big words, I understood the connection. My mind went to the “OMG I get it now!” stage. But, again, unlike you, it’s not so simple. My mind actually traveled throughout space at lightspeed; suggesting to itself that it was one step closer in discovering the mysteries of everything. Elik smacked me out of it, but I don’t play like that. I walked away after I dropped him like I do with my sick bars.

As my search throughout the cosmos has revealed to me, we really are alone.

During winter break, Elik invited me to a gospel music event. People’s smiles melted with joy, the air freshener was the scent of holiness, and the celebration was as if they rediscovered the crucifiction all over again. There was a time when everyone gathered and the band played their songs. All in the moment, everyone cried and praised and jumped and prayed. I was certainly no exception to the overflow. So much so that, as I felt the infinite joy rise within me, my body entirely dispersed. I became free of the mortal body and ascended as a forgiven spirit.

So yeah, that’s pretty much the end of me. There’s no way for me to become physical again and as a spirit there’s only one place I can go. Forgive me if I didn’t mention the outbursts of emotion you may have wanted, some of them get a lil weird, haha. Be thankful your emotions don’t manifest the way mine have. I hope to see you where I am. Goodby-