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The Most Thoroughly Catastrophically Bad Accident
Ingredients
1 moment of Ice
2 tingles of Speed
3 cartons of Teenage Stupidity
4 harvests of Irresponsible Decision Making
3 heaps of Lacking Foresight
2 vials of Muddy Thinking
1 eternity of Damaged Pride
Instructions
Stir 3 cartons of Teenage Stupidity over a heated burner.
Slam 1 moment of Ice and 2 tingles of Speed into your mixture.
Smear 3 heaps of Lacking Foresight and 2 vials of Muddy Thinking into a paste and slather onto 1 eternity of Damaged Pride and let rise for 3 life changing seconds.
After your paste rises, slather your Lacking Foresight paste into a large pan.
Slowly crush your Teenage Stupidity conglomeration on top of your paste and let sit on the side of the road until a police car comes.
Enjoy the Most Thoroughly Catastrophically Bad Accident you’ve ever experienced.
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