January 6:
My mom is forcing me to keep a diary. She said that this what she recommends to some of her patients at work and it might help me out. Yeah right. I am not a little girl who needs to keep a diary about her exhausted life and how much she hates it. She said that she won’t read this but she will check that I wrote in it. This is so annoying, I have no idea what to write.

Im back from complaining to my mom about this stupid piece of s***. She said that I need to write about my problems and about my life. So I am going to try and see if it works, which it won’t. Maybe that is my problem...I need to be less sarcastic. But I mean that is how I am and I can’t change that. So my problems.. Um I struggling in school because school is stupid. Stupid teachers, stupid classmates, stupid place, stupid everything. I like to think of school as hell or prison. Maybe it’s a little better because Jenny and Heather go to my school but other than that it’s probably the same. Why in the world would humans create a place just like hell and make it mandatory to go? So that is my problem: I hate everything about school except my friends. Oh and Kirk. He is pretty cool too. I kind of have a small itsy bitsy crush on him but I would never be able to ever talk to him. Everytime he walks pass me I just stare out with my big eyes and I look like a total freak. I also can never pay attention in any of my classes (which I wouldn’t either way) because this year I was blessed to have him in all of my classes. Jenny and Cora envy me (:

January 10:
WHOOPS! Totally forgot to write in you (; I don’t know if you can tell but I was being sarcastic. I was kind of neglecting to write in this until my mom asked to see what I’ve written so far and she kinda got upset when she say just a little entry in a big book full of pages that I HAVE to write in. So she took my phone away for the day. Joy. She told my dad about how she is forcing me to do this and now he thinks it’s a good idea. Perfect both of my parents hate me and force me to do things I don’t want to do (: I mean keeping a diary isn’t so bad but it isn’t high on my priorities list. Speaking of priorities list this is mine right now:
Follow Kirk around
Stalk Kirk
Get Kirk’s attention
Date Kirk
Love Kirk
Marry Kirk
Have kids with Kirk
Have a happy-ever-after moment and actually be happy for once… with Kirk
So yeah I have been recently more obsessed with Kirk and he is kind of taking up my whole life but I mean no biggy!

January 11:
TODAY IS PROBABLY THE BEST DAY  IN MY LIFE. Kirk talked to me! Ahh. I will always remember the first words he said to me “Did you do the Chemistry homework?” And when I answered I actually sounded and looked normal. Not like a dying whale trying not to get killed. So that’s great. Then after lunch we passed each other in the hallway and he smiled at me. No more like he grinned at me. It was great, it was so so so great. I feel like I am in love even though we have only talked a few words lol. I am starting to like this diary a lot better day by day.

January 12:
Oh Diary you won’t believe it. Kirk invited me to one of his parties this weekend! He says a ton of people are coming and it will be tons of fun. I have heard things about his parties and everyone says that they are really fun. I have been a lot happier lately and my mom asked if anything happened and I told her no, even though that’s a total lie. My life is so much better since last week. Thanks to Kirk (:

I asked mom if I could go to the party and she said yes and that she is starting to like where my life is going. Sadly Heather and Jenny aren’t invited but they will understand. My mother says that I am actually acting like a teenager now… whatever that means.

January 14:
There has been a lot of fighting with me, Jenny, and Heather. They are saying that I have been with Kirk too much. I mean how could they be so selfish they have known that I had a big crush for Kirk and now that it seems that Kirk is interested in getting to know me and talk to me, they think that I am hanging out with him too much? Yeah right, I miss him every time I’m not with him or texting him and I have been missing him a lot. So OBVIOUSLY I am not always with him.

January 16:
Today is Kirk's party! I think he is starting to be into me...I hope he is. What if he ever reads these diary entries? Oh that would be a disaster. I'll get back to you latttta...

You won't be believe it. Me and Kirk kissed! It isn't either of our first kiss but it felt so great. Have you ever been dying to kiss someone and you finally do?! I can only tell you this my dear diary because Jenny and Heather have been excluding me from everything. I'm a littlllllllle drunk because I was served a couple of drinks tonight but I mean I'm functioning perfectly fine! Ahh I feel so relaxed and happy.

January 17:
Kirk hasn't texted me at all and I'm getting worried. Did I do something? Currently missing him like crazy

January 19:
I must have done something. I saw Kirk at school and he had his phone so he was perfectly able to contact me and talk to me. We passed each in the halls, had every class with each other and he didn't ,not once, make eye contact with me. It's like he is doing it on purpose and it hurts. I think of talking to one of his friends but I don't know any of them personally, so that would be weird right?

January 27:
Sorry Diary! I misplaced you and I just now found you. So let me catch you up with my life. So I have been recently starting being friends with this girl named Lana and she has a friend who she introduced me to. His name is Levi. Now instead of ignoring me and excluding me from everything, Heather and Jenny now give me the dead eye every time I am in the same room or the even in the same atmosphere as them. I started to hurt a lot but then I met Levi and Lana and I actually know what true friends are now. But my friendship with Lana and Levi is different with Jenny and Heather and sometimes I miss the girls. But they obviously do NOT miss me.

January 28:
Lana and Levi are good friends with Kirk so when they found out about my situation. They said they would ask him. I’m scared of what he will say to them because I have a feeling that he will act like he doesn’t know me. Heather and Jenny came up to at lunch and asked why I was hanging out with Kirk’s group of friends. I was suprised they actually talked to me. They are so stuck up though, I don’t know how I was friends with either one of them. They are like Regina George from Mean Girls. It’s pretty funny when I think about it.

January 31:
My life is back to normal. It sucks now. I found out that hasn’t talked to me because I wasn’t a good enough kisser. What a total d*****bag. He said that I was hot and cute and all but when he kissed me I was “good enough” for him. I hate myself for liking him. For the past few days, I’ve been really down on myself and Lana and Levi were there to help me. Especially Levi, he kept telling me that I didn’t need Kirk and I was better than him. He is so sweet. Why couldn’t I fall for a guy like Levi. Not like a stupid jock, like Kirk. When I fall for a boy, I fall HARD.

February 1:
Everyone at my school pretty much know about the whole kissing situation so that sucks. I guess Jenny and Heather found out because they tried talking to me and be friends with me again but trust me, My Dear Diary, that won’t happen again. I think now that this has happened my life is better even though it still sucks. Hahaha I make no sense but I am actually a lot happier than I have been for a while.

February 2:
Mom isn’t making me write in a diary anymore after I told her about what was going on and how I was okay. I will miss writing in you but for now I won’t continue. If I ever start to have problems again, I know what to do.

I’ve learn a lot while I was keeping this journal. Who cares about boys. Also I know who are my real, true best friends are. They aren’t Heather and Jenny… they are Lana and Levi. I am so incredibly thankful to have such great friends.