First, let me just say that fifth grade girls are mean. Excitement fills the room because everyone is happy about turning the big one-O. The fall weather brings cool air calming the leftover August heat. The year came with a joyful start, seeing old friends and meeting a new teacher. Smiles plastered everybody’s face. But that stopped when the new girl walked in the room. Her name was V. She walked with a sort of shy presence: shoulders hunched and always she seemed to be looking at her feet. Her desk sat beside mine. Her neatly tied, black converses shook with nervousness under her desk. My best friend of two years felt sorry for her, instantly having a connection of feeling how it’s like to be the new girl. She walked up to her desk and introduced herself as A. Time passed and we all became friends, but there wasn’t the same spark A and I’s friendship anymore. She felt all too interested in V. She ignored me to play with her. She learned new ways and sooner or later they became dressing the same. On the playground, they would hang out by the slides and talk the whole time. When I came within hearing distance, shushes would be told so that I couldn’t be a part of their conversation. A and I lost ourselves on this new year. With new friendship comes new change.
It was spring now. The flowers haven’t bloomed yet, still in their tightly clasped buds. There is a light rain on this foggy day. The sky was gray; not as dark as a stormy cloud, but about a silverfish color. The weather instantly brought down my mood. My seat was so close to the window that I could hear the faint pitter patter of rain. The weather outside caused an indoor recess. I eyed the puzzle on the top shelf. Currently lacking in height, I asked A for help. And of course, wherever A goes, V follows. She reached for the puzzle and was going to hand it to me when she pulled it away. My hand grasped empty air. She held the puzzle over my head teasing me. Taunting me. I attempted to jump up to grab it but she only held it up higher, a nasty grin plastered on her face. V laughed. I tried asking nicely which made V laugh even harder and a giggle to escape A’s mouth. I turned away and slowly walked away. I felt something hit the back of my head. I grasped my head and turned around to see what hit me. It was a puzzle. V was on the floor now and A was grasping her stomach.
That was just a glimpse of what they did to me. They called me names like “stupid” or “retarded.” They made fun of my height. During student performances they would take control and made me the background singer. During a skit my class had to do, they made me the devil. From now on then my nickname was “Devil-a” or simply the “Devil.” They pushed me around and hurt my feelings. Whenever I try to tell them off, they would go to the teacher in tears crying about how mean Selam is or how Selam punched somebody. None of it was true. I kept trying and trying to be their friend, but in the end I realized that it didn’t work.
I needed to confront them. I walked towards the small school building, my steps shaky. It was storming. Although it was late April, the clouds cast a dark shadow on the bright green color of the school. I pushed my hair behind my ears as I entered the school.
I took seat in my desk and waited for her arrival. Time passed. Lessons started, but I wasn’t paying attention. I was staring at the empty desk in front of me. Math class flew past me. Then English, Writing, Science—she still wasn’t there. Two slow hours turned to three which turned to four. Lunch was coming soon. And that was when she opened the door.
She walked with a sort of gait—shoulders back, head up, oozing confidence. I tried to shrink lower in my seat. She walked to her desk carelessly sitting down with her feet apart. I ripped off a piece of notebook paper and wrote her a message.
Can we talk after school? –S
I threw the crumbled paper at her desk. Her slouched shoulders straightened. She slowly unfolded it, reading the words carefully. Then she tore it in two and threw it away.
My heart sunk. I didn’t eat that day. I just slowly watched the rain fall down the window pane. I needed to confront her after school. When it was three thirty I ran hurriedly to the front door so she couldn’t escape me. She strolled down the hall, her black converses squeaking on the floor. She seemed in a rush, quickening her steps when she neared the door. She was not going to pass me and leave without us talking. I stood blocking the door so she could see me.
“Hey,” I called. She made eye contact with me. Finally. She stopped in her tracks, crossing her arms and leaning to one leg. All the words seemed to be rushing out.
“Why are you so mean to me? I thought we were friends-no best friends. I was your only friend when you were the new girl and since then our bond has been inseparable. Why do you torture me every day, knowing that it hurts me? Why did you just suddenly shun me when this new year started?” I was crying now.
She raised her eyebrows and opened her mouth to speak. “I don’t want to hang out with any LOSERS like you. You were a dead weight to me anyway. “
I didn’t want to hear any of this. Upset I said, “You know what? I don’t need some sorry excuse from you. I’m done.”
She rolled her eyes and muttered a “whatever.” She shoved her way past me so she could be picked up.
I turned around, facing the door while wiping the tears out of my face. Stepping outside I greeted the cool air. It stopped storming, but there were still gray clouds. I walked home feeling the small sprinkle of water on my cheeks and hands. Opening the large mahogany door of my house, I was greeted silence. Sighing I switched the light on.
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” a chorus of voices said around me.