I can’t make you care about me. I can’t make you want to read my story. But, I can make you understand a little better why the quiet ones deserve a little more attention than we receive. Every dandelion starts out a pretty deserved plant, but then just as the lawnmower hits it, it dies and blows away. That’s what I feel like. I felt as if I was born a saint baby, just as any other one and then I grew up ugly.

Every time I had wanted to get ahead, I couldn’t I felt as if my Lord had betrayed me or Satan had swallowed me. I was a floating cigarette in a beer bottle; disgusting, little twerp of a creature. Through my eyes I had witnessed the impossible, a change in a child for the worst. My sister Amy was born with Asperger’s syndrome and Schizophrenia. We unforuntely didn’t know until she was at least five.

We were playing quietly into the garden outside.

“Little birdies everywhere.” She said, spinning around in circles. She was a beautiful child of red hair. She had green eyes and freckles. We called her Dotty.

“Dotty, what’s wrong?” I asked concerned. She had abruptly stopped, and was looking at her arm.

“Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!! get them off me!” She screamed. “There are bugs everywhere, their eating me alive.” My mother was trying to calm her down, when she bit my mother. My father picked Dotty up and rushed her to the emergency room. She eventually calmed down and was sent to every child service, welfare help, and camp in the county to make sure she was diagnosed properly. She had two rare conditions.

My grandma’s grandma was psychotic, and it was passed down to my sister. Even though were completely different people I would never judge my sister for her ordeals she cannot control. I love Dotty with everything I have. She is ten now and I am sixteen. I promised her when I got my license I would drive her around.

I know she likes to be outside so I had to promise her. What else could I do, I loved my sister for who she was even though I didn’t know who that was anymore.

“You promised.” Dot said in a baby tone.

“I know I did but I have to go to school now okay.” I said.

“Come one, one time?” She said.

“Fine, one time.” Aggravated I picked her and threw her in the air. She laughed. She weighed so little because she didn’t eat that much.

“Tehehe, thank you Jinna.” She said smiling and running away. I was glad I did that even though I didn’t want to it made her happy inside. I walked to school halfway in the rain when Nemi Janes, NJ my boyfriend picked me up in his car. I climbed in his car smiling. “Thanks for picking me up.” I said.

“Jenna, what happened to you?” He said.

“Whatya mean?” I said.

“Your bag is all ripped.” He said. I explained Dotty my sister must have ripped it, even though I knew my father ripped it, when he flung me across the kitchen counter this morning for spilling my cereal.

“It’s nothing, don’t worry about it”, I said kissing him. I was missing my pencil case, so I asked him to wait for me. I walked back fast, into the house and grabbed the case. Dotty saw me and ran over.

“I put stickers on it Jinna.” She said and she did. Little pony stickers of every size.

“Thankyou.” I said running back to the car. I couldn’t wait to see Nemi again. As I got back to the car I noticed him laughing.

“Pony stickers?” He said smiling. I just kissed him and told him to drive. I couldn’t explain to him why my sister couldn’t go to school, and why how she was different from the rest of the kids her age. I didn’t trust him enough. We had only been dating for a couple months, I hadn’t even introduced him to my family yet. My father was crazy, my mother so meanly over protective over the state of my future and well-being. She worshipped my father’s tactics on punishment. I called him father not dad because my father had died when I was three.

I wish I had gotten to know him before he died. My mother said he was just like me. I cringed at the idea of that. I was a little crazy myself. I was a bi polar child even though I had never been diagnosed. I was told enough I was. Maybe that was the reason my father punished me so much because I deserved it.