Dear Dearest Diary | Teen Ink

Dear Dearest Diary

January 16, 2012
By christina95marie BRONZE, Franklin, Wisconsin
christina95marie BRONZE, Franklin, Wisconsin
4 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Anne: Main Character
Monica: Anne’s best friend
Jason: Anne’s boyfriend
Nicole: Anne’s mom.
Anne: Jason you know how we uhh…well you know what we did…. about 2 months and a half ago?
Jason: *Ignoring Anne* Mhmm yeah.
Anne: You kept your promise right?
(Jason with controller in hand, is focused on the TV)
Anne: Jason! Are you listening to me?! Turn off the game! This is serious!
(Jason turns towards his flustered girlfriend, face red and eyebrows furrowed)
Jason: What. Do. You. Want.
Anne: *looking down* did you use a condom?
Jason: You interrupted my game for this? Why are you asking e this now?
Anne: I didn’t find the wrapper anywhere. Just tell me Jason.
(Anne looking up at Jason’s massive body. Her blue eyes started to water as Jason looked back at the TV with a blank expression.)
Anne: Is this a joke? You promised!
Jason: Don’t worry about it.
(Anne’s petite body didn’t do a number on Jason. All her vicious swings tousled his dirty blond hair and crease his muscle shirt)
Anne: Don’t worry about it?! I haven’t gotten my period since the weekend before!
Jason: *putting the controller down* what are you saying?
(Anne’s resolve slowed with Jason’s attention)
Anne: I’m not sure.
(Jason, panicked, stood up)
Jason: I don’t need to deal with this right now. I’ll text you.
(He walked out the door, not looking behind him as he left)
Anne: He’s going to come back I know he will. He has to!
*calls Monica*
Anne: Can you come over? I just really need to talk to you.
Monica: Where’s Jason? I thought he was coming over for the millionth time.
Anne: Yeah that’s kinda what I have to talk to you about.
Monica: ….well….alright. But you can’t keep ditching me for him then expect me to come over once you don’t have plans anymore. It’s not very fair and honestly it’s getting pretty annoying.
*hangs up*
(Monica walks in the door several minutes later)
Monica: *sighs* Alright what happened? Why are you crying?
Anne: I think I’m pregnant…don’t look at me like that! Look, I was going to tell you but I was scared of what you would think and how you would react.
Monica: Ok I can tell you’re being serious. Who else did you tell? How far along are you? Did you even take a test?!
Anne: Well….just you….and Jason. That’s why I’m crying. He just walked out when I told him. It’s been almost 2 months. And no I didn’t. I don’t even want to think of myself with a big baby making me look fat.
(Monica shakes her head and grabs a glass of water)
Monica: You know, you’re only 16 years old. You can’t handle a baby. You don’t even know how to change a diaper! And about Jason; he isn’t mature enough to handle a child either. He’ll come back around. He’s got nowhere else to go. Tell your mom after we get a test then we can-
(Anne jumps out of her seat)
Anne: What?! Tell my mom? Are you crazy?! You know her just as well as I do! She’ll flip out! She’ll never ever ever forgive me. She’s going to hate me and never let me speak to Jason again!
(Anne sits down as realization hits)
Anne: What am I gonna tell her? How will I possibly bring those works out of my mouth? Oh no. She’s going to be so disappointed. Monica you’ll come with me to tell her right? You’ll have to!
Monica: Sure but don’t you think we should-
Anne: Great. When should we? I’m thinking Sunday so then I won’t have to spend all that much time with her during the weekend. I’ll be at school while she rages about it. Oh ok this is good. It’s Friday so that gives me 2 days to decide how to bring it up. But you can’t really ease something like this into conversation. Did ya know my mom was a teen mom? She always told me ho w she’s going to make sure I’ll be better and I’ll get farther in life. Well surprise!
Monica: Anne stop talking! God nothing’s changed. We should probably get a test just to be sure.
(Anne’s cheeks flushed red as she realized she was rambling and got in the car)
(The girls arrive at the drug store and Anne looked down when the cashier was ringing her up)
Monica: You know, you’re going to have to get used to people looking at you like that. This is just the beginning. People are going to be touching your vag at least twice a month and random strangers are going to want to touch your stomach.
Anne: Thanks for the encouragement. Let’s just go to the bathroom so I can pee on this stick, then you can lecture me all you want.
(6 minutes later)
Anne: Uhh…what does this mean?
Monica: Can I be the godmother Mommy Anne?
Anne: No. There’s no way this is happening. This is faulty. There must be a mistake. I’m only 16! I’m not even tall enough to reach the top shelf of my closet! I can barely take care of myself! How am I supposed to take care of a baby?! I can’t do it. It seems like I won’t even have someone to help me anymore.
Monica: Well don’t kill it! You know you don’t have to take care of it. But like you said- I know your mom just as well as I do, and she won’t be happy with the whole baby thing-obviously-but if you are wanting to abort it, she’ll kill you first. You know damn well that she will do everything in her power to stop you from doing that.
Anne: *looks down and nods* Yeah. I don’t even think that’s right. Why did I even think of that? My mom would go psycho. What am I supposed to do?
Monica: There’s always adoption?
Anne: Ehh. I dunno. I feel like once I push it out, I’ll get attached and be depressed forever. And besides, it was my New Year’s resolution not to regret anything, and I’d regret it for sure.
Monica: But you don’t want to keep it so what other option do you have?
Anne: Yeah yeah I guess you’re right.
(The girls walked home and Anne called Jason)
*Ring Ring*
Jason: What do you want?
Anne: We need to talk. I need to tell you something.
Jason: Look, I’m sorry I walked out before but I’m not ready for a kid so if you’re going to tell me that you’re pregnant, don’t even bother. You should just go and find someone else that will be there for you cause it isn’t going to be me. I’m not about to be a da-
Anne: Jason wait! Listen! I am pregnant but I’m not keeping it. So this means we can still be together right?
Jason: I don’t know Anne; this is all too weird. I don’t think I could be with someone that I knocked up. Sorry.
*Click*
Anne: Jason? Jason please just hear me out. Everything will go back to how it was before all of this? J-J-Jason? Babe? Are you there?
I can’t believe this. I’m alone. I have a baby on the way. My mother is going to hate me. I have to make the hardest decision of my life, and I’m making it by myself. Uhh! This wasn’t supposed to happen! Not now and not like this.
(A couple days later, Anne is pacing the floor while Monica sits on the couch, picking at her nails)
Anne: Mom, I have to tell you something. No no no no no. Mom, can we talk? No, not that…
Monica: Come-on you’ve been doing this for the past hour and a half. Just sit down and relax.
Anne: Ok ok ok. I figured out what I’m going to say.
Monica: Yeah? And what would that be?
Anne: I’m going to say-
Nicole-Oh hey Monica. Haven’t seen you in awhile. What’s the occasion?
Anne: Mom- I’m dying.
(Monica looked at Anne with a confused look)
Monica: *quietly whispers* what kind of plan is this?!
Anne: *whispering* shh just wait.
Nicole: I’m sorry. Repeat yourself please.
Anne: Well…me and Monica went to the doctor and…
Nicole: No. I don’t believe this. I’ll get him on the phone right now. You just probably misunderstood something.
(She goes to pick up the phone but Anne’s hand stops her)
Nicole: Anne what are you doing?
Anne: Mom I’m sorry. I’m not sick or dying or anything like that.
Nicole: Why would you say something like that to me?! You know I have a weak heart! I was scared out of my wits ends. I was just trying to keep cool in front of you so I didn’t scare you. Looks like I should’ve slapped you instead. Explain yourself. Now.
Anne: I figured if I told you something horrible first, you wouldn’t be as upset with the truth because it’s not as bad.
Nicole: And the truth is…?
Anne: Well…ha…ya see it’s a funny story…
Nicole: I’m not laughing.
Anne: Mom, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Guess I’m more like you then I ever thought I would be.
Nicole: What are you trying to say?
Anne: I’m pregnant. It’s Jason’s baby and he wants nothing to do with it. Believe me I didn’t want any of this to happen and I know you probably-
Nicole: Stop. I am very disappointed in you. Just go to your room. Monica please go home and send your family my best regards. I don’t want to hear another word from you Anne.
(Anne walked to her room without another word. Days past and her mother won’t say a word)
Anne: Mom? I know you’ve taught be better, but can you just remember how you felt once you figured out? Please just be there for me and support me. I know this is hard for you, but it’s harder for me.
(Nicole looks, but doesn’t respond)
Anne: I’m not keeping it. I figured someone out there would want him/her. They can probably be better for the baby then I will ever be.
Nicole: I respect your decision. I scheduled a doctor appointment for next week Tuesday and I bought some pills and vitamins you need to take. It isn’t going to taste the best, but you just gotta do it.
(Anne smiles at her mom’s concern)
Anne: Ok I’ll take it. And thanks.
(Weeks later, Anne calls Monica to update her)
Monica: A girl? Really? Oh how exciting! I always envision my first baby being a girl. They just have the cutest clothes!
Anne: Yeah I have a million names picked out but I don’t think I’m allowed to pick the name. That’s going to be up to the adoptive parents. But I talked to the adoption agency today and I told the lady I wanted an open adoption so I’ll still get to see her and stuff.
Monica: Wow you’re lucky.
Anne: Lucky was the last thing that comes to my mind. You were right before- the doctor was all over my vag. Talk about awkward. Guess I’ll have to get used to it.
(Months pasted. Anne gave birth to Callie Jade.)
Anne: I am NEVER going through that again. That was the worst pain I have ever gone through and it’s never going to happen again.
Nicole: Ha. You did very good hunny. I’m proud of you. You did the right thing; giving your baby away I mean. Carl and Janice are great. They said they’ll let you stop by to see Callie at anytime and they’ll send pictures at the end of each month. This is a good thing; just remember that.
Anne: Yeah I know. I feel a lot better than I thought I would.
(The mother and daughter hugged and Anne stayed in touch with her daughter and adoptive parents)



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