One day the world might as well crash and burn on the asphalt i know the universe is. Sure i consider myself strong, but not strong enough to take a bullet. Bullet. Okay maybe giving everything i could to him was a little stupid but i mean come on. Who can blame me? Him. Just him. Just him and all the other sad excuses for friends i have. Had. Oh my god whats happened to me. I used to be strong. What about now? Venting in story after story that somehow makes my life feel like its not so bad. Sure he dumped me, but what hurts is that even though i expected it. Maybe even hoped for it, three months later I've convinced myself that i love him. and i have come up with the perfect lies to tell when people stare, and start running their mouths like they know my life’s instant replay. Lies, is that what i tell, it doesnt feel like a lie. A sin. It feels like the kind of fib you tell someone thats about to get hurt. Bad. But maybe it is a bold faced lie. Anyways what am i even supposed to say? Certainly not the truth of the matter which is that i love him and if he were to come back my heartbeat should surely stop. Bullet. Maybe thats what i need. A Silver Bullet. No, no im not that despret. I dont want to end life, i want to lI've another. Try again. LI've another chance to be someone not so grounded in the rut humanity really is. Screw Guys. I mean seriously people who needs them? A Silver Bullet. Do i need one? No. No way. i mean even if thats what everyone was screaming at me to do im not going to resort myself to self harming in anyway. Just because Parker chose the end the support and the.... the.... oh god now im crying. And not just any crying. I gave all i could to this, this.... KID. oh why me.

Now i know. A Silver Bullet. Thats what i need.